DFFPodcast posts
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UPDATE ON ABANDON HOPE AND MORE
Hello everyone!It is I, your friendly neighborhood TJ, here to provide you with an update on the latest Abandon Hope, which I first teased a little over a month ago. This delay has been extremely unprofessional on my part, but I’m sure that you understand that a huge part of the reason for the hol...
Possible Futures: Part 2 = DFF
Coming in with that early Friday episode for those in different time zones.Here's the joke for today:"What does a Borg-Again Christian say?Rᴇsɪsᴛᴀɴᴄᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ sᴇʀᴍᴏɴɪᴢɪɴɢ ɪs ғᴜᴛɪʟᴇ."
GREASE TRAP: (mostly) EDUCATION EDITION
I used to have two kidneys. Then I grew up.Nᴏᴡ I ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴀᴅᴜʟᴛ ᴋɴᴇᴇs.
FLASH FRIED: 18 MAR 2020
A farmer counted 48 cows on his property.But when he rounded them up, he had 50.Audio attached.
THE GREASE TRAP: 16 MAR 2020
What do you call a door when it's not a door?Aᴊᴀʀ.
DFF Vs The Democratic Debate
Tune in tonight to watch us cover the first 1-on-1 debate between Sen. Sanders and V.P. Joe Biden.Watch it Here ☾ https://bit.ly/2vooT25 ☽
Disgusting History = DFF
WHO THE FUCK FARTED.
The Grease Trap: BIDEN EDITION
"What do we want?""A cure for dementia!""When do we want it?""Want what?"
Jiggly Butts
A TJ livestream
FLASH FRIED: 11 Mar 2020
Why won't ants get the coronavirus?They have ᴀɴᴛʏ-ʙᴏᴅɪᴇs.ᴬᵘᵈᶦᵒ ᵃᵗᵗᵃᶜʰᵉᵈ.
THE GREASE TRAP: 09 MAR 2020
My favorite word is "drool."Iᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʀᴏʟʟs ᴏғғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏɴɢᴜᴇ.
SNAKE EMOJI: Take 2
In the shadow of TJ, there is Paul. In the shadow of Paul, there is Scotty. In the shadow of Scotty, there is.....SNAKE! Join Scotty and Taylor for another rambling diversion from reality.
Joke Thieves
Here's my joke for this evening:Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place, man? There's such balance in nature.Goddamn, I'm brilliant. I should make a living in stand-up!
GREASE TRAP: 06 Mar 2020
What is Harry Potter's favorite method of getting down a hill?Walking... ᴊᴋ, ʀᴏʟʟɪɴɢ.
SUPER TUESDAY - A Special Flash Fried
We streamed it live for everyone, but the archived copy is yours and yours alone, dear patrons. The plebs will have to settle for a mere preview. REVEL IN YOUR SUPERIORITY!
Early Access - The New Definition of Racism
Tell me what you think, bitches.
Grease Trap: 02 Mar 2020
Why is 6 afraid of 7?Because 7 is a ʀᴇɢɪsᴛᴇʀᴇᴅ 6 ᴏғғᴇɴᴅᴇʀ.Audio coming soon.
Unintentional Creepiness and the Uncanny Valley = DFF
Audio attached. Sophia made sure of it.
THE GREASE TRAP: 28 Feb 2020
Audio attached.*SCREECHING HALT*WOAH HOLD THE FUCK ON. Who let the 5 dollar patrons in here? This succulent dish is for the ELITE $10 patrons. PATREON!!!!
Flash Fried: 27 Feb 2020
Still working on video in the new studio, but we still have a Flash Fried for you!
Flash Fried and Show Update
Tonight's Flash Fried is postponed until tomorrow.
THE GREASE TRAP: 24 FEB 2020
I bought the world's worst thesaurus today. Not only was it terrible, but it was also ᵗᵉʳʳᶦᵇˡᵉ.Audio attached.
Scotty vs Paul: The Battle for TJ’s Shadow
It's the battle for 2nd place!Audio attached.
The Grease Trap: 21 Feb 2020
A plateau is the highest form of ғʟᴀᴛᴛᴇʀʏ.Audio attached.
Abandon Hope Suggestions Thread
You know what to do.
Flash Fried: 19 Feb 2020
Audio attached for ya
The Grease Trap: 17 Feb 2020
What's the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?My pizza jokes can't be topped!Audio attached.
MARLON BRANDO: King of the Trolls
AUDIO VERSION AVAILABLE BELOWWWWW
tHE gREASE tRAP
AUDIO VERSION BELOW
THE ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION VIDEO
I'm not sure if I will release this one publicly or not. I may want to refine my arguments a bit more before taking this to a mass audience. But I suppose that all depends on what you guys think. So here it is in all of it's ranty glory. Your opinions are highly welcome.Audio attached.
