Anon42
patreon
Weekly Update - 6-19-2021 (More Edovex H-scene updates, another (good!) status update)
🕑 Added 2021-06-19 23:49:58 +0000 UTCHey everyone. This week was a mixture of both great, and ehh. The bad news, which I'll get out of the way first, is that the work side of things was the 'ehh' part; I didn't get as much writing as I wanted done, BUT I did have the most productive day I've had in over a month, so it wasn't a complete loss! I managed to take a script from about 50% to finished in a single day, which may not sound like much, but it feels like a lot right now, so I'm trying to stay positive.
Orex is also still banging out animations for me to implement once I'm fully back in action. This week he finished up a few things; a clothed version of Alicia's masturbation animation, a "death" transition into said scene for when Alicia runs out of HP in gameplay, and an update to the regular (non-BE) Edovex H-scene. For that H-scene update, in addition to the obvious anatomy and shading improvements, Orexius went out of his way to update the animation from 4 to 6 frames total, so it's a huge improvement over the old scene! Due to the NSFW nature of it, I'll be posting a preview of it after this in a Patron-only post, but if you aren't a patron, you can find it on the other places I post updates too.
So, now for the GOOD news! I posted last week that it sounded like it would be 1-2 weeks before I could see a behavioral doctor to talk about my mental health, and that seemed to be the case more and more, because they didn't end up calling me back. They said that might happen and if they didn't I should call them back, so I was planning on doing that (and was putting it off because phone anxiety, bleh), but I got a call from them for a separate topic entirely regarding my physical health, and while I was already wrapped up in a phone call I asked them about scheduling an appointment with a behavioral doc.
Apparently, she was the correct person to ask about it, because she managed to get me scheduled for a telehealth call with someone just two days later. That call has already come and gone, and I have officially been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and ADD - all of which I already pretty much knew I had, but, it's still a weird feeling to be officially diagnosed. Still, getting some confirmation is nice, and it's a good reminder that I'm not just lazy or insane, since my brain likes to try and convince me I am all the time.
So now that I've been officially diagnosed, a few things are happening. First, the doctor I spoke to is going to look into therapists and get me a list. I'll be meeting with her again in about a month, so I'll likely be starting weekly therapy in late July/early August. I also have an appointment scheduled for July 1st with someone who handles medications/prescriptions, and that's when I'll be getting medication to help counter all of this in the short-term, while the therapy helps to address the root of the problem. All this is to say, things are really looking up right now! I still have a bit of waiting to do (and by extension, I still have to ask for all of your patience for just a little while longer), but the ball has started rolling now, at long last.
I still haven't quite internalized that all of this is happening. I've been dealing with mental health issues for so long, it's just become a "normal" part of my life, something that never really went away even on the best of days. Heck, even now in the process of getting help, the ~24 hours leading up to all of these appointments always fills me with crippling anxiety and I can barely bring myself to do anything. It's such a big part of my existence that I can't imagine a life where I don't have all of these issues.. and yet, because of all of you, I can actually afford to take the steps necessary to make it happen. It's going to be a long road to fixing myself completely, but getting started is always the hardest part, so things can only get better from here. I don't know if I'll ever be able to truly thank you guys enough for this, and all the other things you've done for us, but as soon as I'm able, I'm gonna do my damn best to try!
Comments
Alex Patock
As someone who shares those problems, I really hope they can get you the right help. I recommend approaching your medicine management slowly. If the psychiatrist tries to throw too many medicines at you at once then I recommend asking them to only do one medicine at a time. I don't want to sound like I don't trust them, but some psychiatrists have been known to prescribe a few too many medicines at once. I've been safe from them myself, but a relative of mine wasn't. It's also going to take a while for everything to actually start feeling different. Most of the medicines I take weren't really obvious in the differences they made. Just be patient, it could take a few days to a couple weeks. During that time do lots of self-reflection and keep track of your mental state. Another big thing, don't lie or hide anything from your therapist or your psychiatrist. For them to properly help you they need to know everything about you. For example I have insomnia, but I don't take a sleep aid like melatonin because that's not the cause. I actually take Seroquel which is an anti-psychotic because anxiety is what keeps me awake at night. If I had just told my psychiatrist that I had insomnia and didn't open up to her about the fact that I can't sleep because of negative thoughts then I probably would have just been given some standard sleep aids and nothing would have changed. So yeah honesty is insanely important. Every detail matters. Sorry for the long message, I just felt that some advice from someone in a similar position might be helpful to you.
RevolverJ
That's the spirit!
