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Promo Code For Patrons / Next Drop
Happy Holidays, Freaks!Just wanted to drop a note and say thanks for supporting DV on Patreon! As you probably know, every year I open the DV store and stock it with a mixture of cool DV merchandise and silly weird crap. This year is no different: from 20th anniversary shirts to Strawberry Shartcake...
DV Umbrellas!
Got the umbrella sample in and I think it looks good. It's a go! I'll be working on getting them out to higher tiered patron ($20+ level) soon! Thanks again so much for continuing to support this stupidity :)
Sticker Time!
Updated this post to include instructions on how to message me in the Patreon Mobile App. See below.I finally got the last of the stickers in the mail, so I'm ready to start sending them off to you.I wanted to do something special for more patrons. For those who pledge at least $20 (and I urge y...
March 2024 DV Logo Plushie Pillow For Higher Tier Patrons
Hey Freaks!As promised, here is what $20+ tiered patrons will be receiving in the coming weeks. I think these things are really cool - they came out great and are very soft and plushy.Also, I've been wanting to do something for all of my patrons, no matter the tier they are at. So, in April I...
Thanks Patreons - DV Store Promo Code!
Just wanted to say thank you so much for supporting DV's Patreon! I know it ain't much, but I have a promo code here for you to use if you're thinking about buying some stuff in the DV store.25% off your order - just use promo code 1800ASSHOLE at checkout.(Please dont share this code. it...
I Like Beer! It Good For You! $20+ Tier Freak Stuff Coming Your Way
Thanks so much for continuing to support the show! If you are pledging at the $20+ level (and you've provided your address here on Patreon) be expecting a new delivery in the coming week or two-ish.This pint glass is a contender for the DV store this year. When you get it, let me know if looks g...
DV Store Promo Code(s)
Happy Holidays Freaks!Just for you patrons, I've got a promo code you can use on your next order of fine, quality DV merchandise. https://www.distortedview.com/store2Get 10% off your order of $25+ with promo code PERVERTMARRIAGE at checkout.That's not all! If you happen to also be a Sideshow...
DV Physical Perk Coming Your Way
Healthy and plentiful semen production relies on a well-hydrated body. Your creepy uncle Tim cares about you and wants you to have thick creamy loads, thats why he's sending Patrons at the $20 level one of these insulated bottles. They are emblazoned with a multi-color DV logo, to let the world ...
Cougar Piss - Finished
My fun exercise in making dumb animations is finally done. I took old DV audio from a fake commercial for "Cougar Piss" cologne and made an animated commercial for it.
Patron Podcast 01/29 - The Dead Dog Diaries
Hey Patrons!As I mentioned on the show, I wanted to share with you my thoughts and experiences with DEAD DOGS. It's a real uplifting half-hour of power. I liked: it's only 27 minutes. Still, I hope you enjoy what seems to be just a therapy session for me as I work some shit out.
Cougar Piss
Afternoon freaks!I'm still messing around with that animation software I mentioned yesterday. To practice, I've taken an old DV audio commercial for the male cologne COUGAR PISS and put some animation to it. It's about a 3rd of the way done.All of the character in the cartoon were first ...
Here's Something Too Awful To Share With The World
One of the most requested things that patrons have told me they would like to see is more behind-the-scenes stuff. I plan on sharing audio/video of how I record the show in the future, but today I wanted to show you something different that is truly awful. It's also something that say got me exc...
Help With New DV Project + Hear It First + Store Promo Code!
Hey Patrons!Listeners have been asking for a new "DV Primer" - a special episode that helps introduce new listeners to the podcast and the magical world of Distorted View. I did one of these primers many, many years ago but its times for a new, updated version.On the show, I plan to explain ...
Stickers And Masks
Hello patrons!I sent out free stickers to some of the higher tier patrons earlier this year, and I'm sending masks out this weekend (for $20+ patrons, check the previous post I made a little earlier tonight).As promised, I can finally offer the stickers and masks to all of you fine freaks. It to...
First Dibs On DV Masks
Well, this stupid pandemic isn't going away. As a matter of fact, 22 states are reporting an increase in cases. It's time to cash in on this bitch. As always, you Patrons are getting the goods first.Here's the deal. If you are at the $20 or higher patron level, you will get one of these ...
Watch Me Record An Episode Of DV (in 9 minutes)
Today sucked! My allergies were KILLING ME. I looked/felt miserable but I tried not to let it affect the show. You be the judge!Freaks always ask to see me recording parts of the show, so I thought I'd do something for you Patrons.I turned on my cam and recorded today's whole DV experience. ...
Let's Call The Party Line And Test My Voice Changer
Hey Freaks!I got a new toy in the mail today (NO, not something from Adam&Eve) - A voice changer! This might be useful when I call those gross party lines and want to sound like a girl.I'm going to test my new feminine voice and see how convincing it sounds - by luring men in to verbally sex me ...
Sticker Pack #1
Hey Freaks!A lot of you have asked for stickers over the years, and we've done a few here and there, but never a complete sticker pack. So, let's do one!Patrons who are pledging $10 a month or more can get these all for free. Thank you so much for your generosity and support over the years. ...
Patron Podcast: 02/17/20
Back here with another personal podcast. Today, I share with you two journal entries from 2002 to give you an idea of where I was at that particular time in my life. It was kind of depressing.Not sure how interesting this is, so only listen if you really really really care about the mundane daily mu...
The Most Useless Application Of AI / Neural Nets
Back in the early 2000's I started making dumb videos for my website. In order to keep the file sizes to a minimum, the resolution of these things were like 320x240. To give you an idea of what videos look like today, a typical television/monitor resolution is 3840 x 2160. What I'm basically...
Patron Podcast: 12/16/19
Hey Freaks!Sorry it's been awhile! I've been spending the last month or so working on the DV store and merchandise (get 10% off with promo code HOWDAREYOU) but I have returned today with a new personal podcast.I talk a little bit about Christmas and the love life of my teenage nieces, but th...
Current Patreon Voicemail Line
Hey Freaks!I've had a few new members ask where to find the voicemail number. Here it is!(646) 820-7741Occasionally this number will change, but I will give you a big heads up when it does. Until then, use this number and I look forward to playing your calls on the show.-T
My Top Three Favorite Japanese Game Show Games
Here's a little bonus video for Patrons this month. I may end up posting this on the Sideshow or making it public for all in the future, but for now its just for you! Consider it an early access video. I was just messing around today, learning Final Cut Pro and decided to make a video featuring ...
Bleached Dolls And My Offensive Tweet History
Just sort of shooting the shit today. I talk about how awful children take care of their favorite toys, and I track down some of my offensive tweets that will probably ruin any future career I might have.Attached a screenshot from the furry podcast setup I mentioned
Personal Podcast 3- My Mom's Bush
It's been too long! I'm back with another podcast answering a few questions about me, my show, and inexplicably, my mom's vagina.Thank you all for sticking with and continuing to support this Patreon account. More new, weird, and wonderful things are on the way.Here is the bathroom mold ...
DV Thank You Boxes Are Finally Shipping Out
Hey Freaks!Sorry that it has been so long since the last update. I want you know how much I appreciate your continued support on Patreon and really do plan on posting more exclusive content in the following weeks. I fully expect to post the next "personal" podcast in the next few days.One of...
Patreon Podcast #2 : Comedy Influences
I share with you guys some of the shows that I think shaped what I think is funny.
Untitled Patreon Podcast Episode 1
Hey Freaks!Here's the episode of the patron-only podcast! Let me know what you want to hear in upcoming episodes. Also, I'm looking for suggestions for a name of the podcast. I expect to do 1-2 of these a month.You can add this Patreon-only podcast feed to your favorite podcast app. In the u...
The Hubris Of Inexperience
The abomination above is the first comedy video I ever made as an adult. Actually, that's not entirely true, as it gets worse: this is the DVD-style commentary we made of the first comedy video I ever made. We really thought highly of ourselves, I guess.A little bit of history: before I started ...
Rat Sex Artwork Auctioned Off On PBS
Hey freaks! This video will eventually be public and I'll share it on Facebook and Youtube, but I thought you guys deserve to have access to it before anyone else.Thanks to ruralgaming in the discord for sharing the original video!
