lauraperlongo

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lauraperlongo posts

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damn been a long week just tie me up or whatever

late night version of this is so chaotic 😂 yeah so this we..

late night version of this is so chaotic 😂 yeah so this week we ignoring news events entirely and just going straight to complaining about the usuals…illness, allergies and lopsided boobs. Oh and book ur summer air b&bs. Also fractions. Practice math. Live a little why not. No intentional n...

sorry for the late DM 👐

hyped for Mother’s Day ngl

weekday vibe

🍬🍬🍬

call me zaddy

today we’re watering plants and talking about… post-vacatio..

today we’re watering plants and talking about… post-vacation blues allergies hoe shit undiscussed… my stolen ebike battery why sun dried tomatoes ruin everything the Virginia judicial system microplastics the new emojis have a great week everybody! 🫣🫶

wholesome breakfast 😌

What a day to be alive 🌱 I hope you’re out falling in love ..

What a day to be alive 🌱 I hope you’re out falling in love somewhere 😊

our neighbor gave us a piano but i quit piano when i was 8 s..

our neighbor gave us a piano but i quit piano when i was 8 soooooo here we are? 😂

film >

ok i hear youUuu. Haha MORE CONTENT COMING 🦮 I wanna to do..

ok i hear youUuu. Haha MORE CONTENT COMING 🦮 I wanna to do a new weekly series tho, u right u right. The weekly belly progressions were fun. Let’s do a busy mom version of that? Pajama short plant watering content? We down with it? too real? 🙈 do we like that? low key. Asmr. livestream? ...

ok everyone … with a heavy heart the time has come to bid ad..

ok everyone … with a heavy heart the time has come to bid adeiu to my Only Fans. I’ve had a great time getting to know everyone and will cherish the memories we’ve made together forever. Thank you for being here to support and encourage me during such a delicate time in my life. You’ve helpe...

#Heardle #30 🔊🟩⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ 😛

baby obviously prefers the right 😂 you?

photographer had to reschedule but I already did my cat eye...

photographer had to reschedule but I already did my cat eye. It’s cool tho I’m fine she’s fine… 😭😭😭

omg HI it’s been a real mr.toad’s wild ride kinda couple wee..

omg HI it’s been a real mr.toad’s wild ride kinda couple weeks but I’m hereeee. Updates: baby sleeping through night ✔️ spring in New York has sprung ✔️ I’m back writing for stuff that isn’t social media related ✔️✔️💀😂 I almost feel alive again ✔️✔️✔️�...

cocktail sauce or nah? Also, do you hate when someone pree..

cocktail sauce or nah? Also, do you hate when someone preemptively lemons the whole tray? I hate it. Keep your juice on your own oyster (unless instructed otherwise, of course)

tryna stay in tbh

some days b like that

⛪️

8 weeks!!! jk jk jk can u imagine? Nahhh just 4 1/2 months ..

8 weeks!!! jk jk jk can u imagine? Nahhh just 4 1/2 months postpartum with a moment to oogle and compare. 5 days, 3 weeks and 4 1/2 months in the side by side def show the slow shift back down to “normal” or whatever that means. Strangely not a ton of change since 3 weeks pp except i lost my ...

me n u working out late night, what’s ur first move?

wellll I’m back in the snow and cold. And i must say…HAPPILY..

wellll I’m back in the snow and cold. And i must say…HAPPILY. This is the only photo of me that exists from our weeklong trip bc, as many of you know, parenting (and what a cliche to admit it) is really a no days off, no time to pose situation. I think I “relaxed” for about 36 minutes tota...

stocked up for the snow storm

here she is again, mom-after-dark confessionals It’s been ..

here she is again, mom-after-dark confessionals It’s been nearly impossible to hold it together lately. Started a laundry list of the things bogging me down but then the list itself started bogging me down and I WANT OUTTA THE BOG. Long story short, moms (esp moms with 90% of the parenting load)...