TOONZIES
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Jackass Parody Script *rough draft*
🕑 Added 2019-04-15 15:13:21 +0000 UTCNow this one is interesting and may be long idk yet! but ehres the rough draft script!
Welcome To Head Ass!
*Shows myron*
Myron: Hi im myron and welcome to head ass!
*car tries to hit myron just eats it*
myron: Yall feel something?
*Jackass music plays for the intro*
*Shows alexidria on a slingshot*
Alexis: Hi im alexidria and this is "Shark bait woo ha ha"
juicy: You ready?
*Alexidria gets comfortable*
Alexis: READY!
*Juciy pulls the slingshot and launches alexidria across the river over some
horny sharks dressed as ricardo*
*Alexidria screaming fuck and ouch and why you horny shit like dat*
juciy: Well damn she bout to get raped.
*cuts to next stunt*
*shows myron in the studio*
myron: Hi im myron and this is the "Lil Nas"
*Myron records his country song and it hits the top of the country charts*
*shows kkk staring at there computer*
kkk: do my eyes decieve me?? wait! IS THIS A NIGGER!?!
*cuts off to next stunt*
*Shows dre outside*
dre: wassup ya'll im dre and this is "Brave Black Man*
*dre walks up to random white cop*
dre: Hey man how your doing?
*cop looks at him punches himself then shoots dre*
dre: YO WHAT THE FUCK!!
*Shows pandora & Aleixdria*
Pandora: Hi im pandora.
alexis: *Sighs* and im Alexidria..
pandora: And this is "Hide N Go Piss..."
alexidria: Lets get this one over with..
rocky: Ight R kelly your ready?
rkelly: IM FIGHTING FOR MY FUCKIN LIFE!!
*rocky starts counting down from 10 and pandora & alexis run and hide*
alexis: AH FUCK!!
*they finish counting r kelly starts looking for them*
*shows pandora hiding behind a tree rkelly pops up*
rkelly: I love all the women!
*rkelly pisses on pandora*
pandora: YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*shows alexis hiding*
Alexis: i swear to God imma kill TOONZIES for coming up with this!
*r kelly finds her*
rkelly: I love all the women!
*rkelly pisses on alexis*
alexis: FUCK MY LIFE!!!
*Shows myron and rocky evreryone laughing*
Juicy: Now that was funny!
*Juicy gets pissed blasted too*
*cuts to next stunt*
*Shows myron and rocky*
myron: Hey wassup im myron and this is "Pure torture"
*Myron turns on jump force loading screen and they stare at it and start randomly puking.*
rocky: I CANT TAKE THE PRESSURE!
*rocky jumps out the window*
*Cuts to next scene*
*Shows rocky in alexidrias house*
rocky: hi my name is rocky.. and this is "Morning Alarm"
*Shows tea cup sleeping near a wall*
*rocky kicks him to the wall and teacup gets mad and all swole and attacks rocky*
myron: SHIT RUN RUN RUN!!!!!
*Cuts to the next stunt*
*shows Juicy wewe on a laptop*
Juicy: Hi I’m juicy wewe and this is "Internet Troll"
*juicy goes on random youtube comments and commented "Nigger"
*Shows a angry group of black man*
juicy: Now i gotta wait til they reply!
*Shows a bunch of black guys behind him*
juicy: Ah shit nuggets.
*cuts to next stunt*
*shows rocky myron and daniel*
rocky: hi im rocky and this "The Jeuss Game"
daniel: You ready to die for our sins nigga??
rocky: No..
myron: Ight get the cross!
*Daniel and javon pull put the cross and lays rocky on the cross and nails him*
rocky: BRUH BRUH CHILL CHILL!!!
myron: HOLD STILL NIGGA!!!
rocky: WAIT WAIT WAIT IM NOT READY!!
*Myron nails rockys hands and feet to the cross and rocky is screaming*
myron: HOLD HIM STILL!!! HOLD HIM STILL!!!
*They stand the cross up with rocky on it, Rocky is panting*
Daniel: We out of thorn crowns so we got this crown from burger king.
rocky: There were done! now get me down from here!
myron: Nope not yet! its time to crucify!!
*myron pulls out a spear and stabs rocky and its just silent*
Daniel: Damn whats taking him so long? isnt he suppose to come back alive?
myron: I think thats what happens in the bible.
alexis: Idk bruh that bible shit is so confusing.
*cuts to next scene*
*Shows Dahimr and Zero*
Zero: What yall know about these popeyes biscuits?
*Zero puts the biscuit on the ground*
*Zero and dahmir take off there pants*
Zero: Hi im zero!
dahmir: *Sigh* and im dahmir..
zero: And this is "Soggy Biscuit"
dahmir: Lets get this over with..
*Zero and dahmir start jerking off on the biscuit*
*zero making gay grunting noises*
dahmir: BRUH MOAN IN YOUR HEAD!!
zero: OHH! OH GRANDMA!!
*zero nuts on te biscuits*
Zero: BET IM SAFE!!!
alexis: DAMN NIGGA JUST NUT ALREADY! DAMN!!!
dahmir: BRUH IM TRYING I CANT DO IT WHEN PPL ARE WATCHING!!
zero: Your not jerking off right! here i gotchu!
*Zero grabs dahmirs dick and starts aggressively jerking it*
dahmir: BRUH STOP THIS IS GAY THIS IS GAY!!! LET GO OF ME YOU HOMO!!!
Zero: HOLD STILL LET ME FINISH!!
*everyone is laughing*
*dahmir nuts*
rocky: Ight dahmir you nutted last! you gotta eat the biscuit!
dahmir: ..And if i dont?
*teacup pops up*
teacup: YOU GET DIS WORK NIGGA!!
dahmir: CHILL CHILL CHILL!! OK ILL EAT IT!!!
*dahmir picks up the biscuit and stares and it*
*dahmir sniffs it and he pukes*
*everyone starts laughing*
Zero: Eat up bro!
dahmir: I dont wanna do it!!
alexis: Here ill add some seasoning to it so itll taste better!
*alexis sprinkles seasoning on the biscuit*
*dahmir takes a bite and pukes everywhere*
*everyone dies laughing*
zero: Look at the camera bro and smile!!
*Dahmir pukes*
zero: Idk why your complaing nigga its just a biscuit!
*zero picks up the biscuit and eats it*
zero: Mmm! Not bad! salty! The texture is moist! Seasoning on point! WHY YOU BITCHING FOR?!!
*dahmir pukes again*
*Cuts to next scene*
*SHows billy in a shopping cart*
Dre: Hi my name is Dre and this is "Extreme Frogger"
juicy: 3 2 1! GO!!
dre: A YUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
*Dre rolls down a steep hill into on going traffic and gets fucked up badly*
juicy: Whelp that ended up badly. Like expected.
juicy: Dont try this at home.
The end.
