Author Artemis
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Lily — Beloved of the Gods Chapter 09 - Lily's First Customer Feedback is Intense!
🕑 Added 2025-11-07 18:46:14 +0000 UTCIt was sooooo good!
“Mmmmmm!”
The bun perfectly encapsulated the burst of savory flavors of the ground beef patty, the cheese, the ketchup, and the little bit of pickle!
It was a symphony of flavor! An orchestra of optimal nutrition!
Carbs, protein, fats… Unknown to the people of Appalashia, but perfectly balanced for human nutrition. If anything, it was a little protein heavy…
And then there was the french fries!
Hazel couldn’t help but keep saying “Mmm, mmm!” as she ate her Lilyburger, and she took a sip of delicious, cold lemonade to clear her palate.
It was perfectly balanced sweet and sour.
And the french fry…
Hazel had never eaten anything like it!
It was salty, and there was a satisfying crunch, just a hint of crunch, before she broke through the outer fried shell and to the pillowy cooked potato underneath!
Her father chuckled as he watched Hazel eat.
He had had a Lilyburger set yesterday, just to try it.
Sure, it was good, but his love for his wife had won out over his tastebuds.
He was a man… of habit!
He loved his wife’s cooking!
New things were alright, but he’d always choose his wife’s cooking first!
He had been truly disappointed that he had forgotten his lunch today.
Hazel scarfed down her food at high speed. It was too good!
The nutritionally dense food was just what her growing teenage body needed!
She finished off her last bite of Lilyburger, and her last french fries, and finished off the cup of lemonade. Then she placed her elbows on the table, laced her fingers in front of her eyes, and glared down at the metal plate.
It was intense! It was like she was contemplating Third Impact!
Tim laughed quietly and stood up, taking his cup and filling it with water quickly while there was no line.
Teens sure could be dramatic!
When he came back, Lily was still glaring at the plate.
Tim sat down and sipped his water, now slightly lemonade flavor.
“So, you liked the Lilyburger set, huh?”
“Dad…”
“Hmm?”
“How… how did that little girl become a chef?!”
She looked up at him!
She had an intense look in her eye!
Tim…
Took another sip of his water!
The thunk of the cup striking the table resounded as he set it down gently!
Hazel was hanging on his every word and movement!
The attention was quite flattering, but Tim…
He didn’t really know!
He was dragging this out!
“Hrmm…” he hummed. “I don’t really know. Two days ago she just showed up with that cart, and started selling Lilyburgers.”
“Who taught her how to make them?!”
They both looked over at the cart where the girl was selling the final Lilyburger set, to the dismay of the handful of miners who had gotten into line late.
She just apologized and said she would be back again the next day, then started cleaning up.
Lily and her Dad couldn’t see the two ghosts of the WcDonald brothers talking to her about efficiency and trying to sell twenty-five sets the next day.
“Maybe her mother? I used to hear from Bill all the time that his wife was the best cook in the whole village. Why, we used to get into quite the shouting matches, he and I, over whose wife’s cooking was better. I was right, of course, but I must say, I might have been too harsh with that scallywag. If nothing else, the Lilyburgers and french fries are incredibly creative…”
Hazel gave her father that look all daughters give their fathers when they start blathering on about something tangential instead of dealing with the matter at hand—which typically is whatever their teenage son or daughter cares about more at the moment.
“Dad, focus. Do you know where she got that cart? It’s like a mini, mobile kitchen…”
“Kitchen? I shouldn’t think so. There’s no oven, no stove. Just the griddle and oil fryer. Look, there’s not even a sink: Bill’s daughter just uses the sink next to the supervisor’s shack.”
“No, Dad, that’s definitely a kitchen. It has the soul of a kitchen! A kitchen is a place… where chefs make food! Even a campfire can be a kitchen!”
“Right, right, whatever you say, dear…”
“Don’t use that line on me!”
The whistle to go back to work blew, and Tim stood up and stretched.
“Well, time to go back to work. Thanks again for bringing me my lunch. Tell your mother it was delicious!”
“Uh huh,” Hazel responded, completely not listening.
She was focused on the kitchen! On the cart!
She stood up abruptly.
“I’m going to go talk to that little girl!”
“Alright, just don’t bother her too much while she’s working. Her Dad’s laid up with an injury, and I heard his wife had to quit her job to take care of him. They might be struggling.”
All the miners were worried about Bill and his family.
But they never came asking for help, so the miners figured it couldn’t be too bad.
That Bill… He was too prideful to ask for help, a lot of the time.
He just quietly tried to do everything himself, and eventually, it had caught up with him.
Injured on the job…
In some kind of fantasy or futuristic world, maybe he could have gotten some kind of compensation for workers, or welfare payment while he recovered.
But this world wasn’t so kind.
This world wasn’t so developed.
The best people could do was be careful, pray to the Gods, and help each other out.
Tim thought… and he decided!
He was going to help out!
Yes, help out.
He was going to get his wife to make some food to bring over to that scallywag Bill and his family!
Heheheh… He’d make Bill acknowledge his wife’s cooking!
With not entirely pure emotions, Tim planned some charity work and community support for the near future!
His Piety Points…
Rose, just a little bit!
It just barely counted!
Up in heaven, even the God and Goddess of Marriage sighed with exasperation!
“Not everything has to be a competition, Tim…” they said.
Hazel stood up as well, carrying the metal plate over to Lily’s cart.
Her heart was awash with emotions! Stormy, even! Chaotic!
The food had been truly creative and delicious!
The cart was also creative! She’d never have come up with the idea, herself.
She could admit that much. She knew that to be a great chef, one had to be rational and objective.
But, she still had critiques!
The menu was limited!
Extremely limited!
A real restaurant had an expanded menu!
In the restaurants Hazel had heard about—she had never been to a real restaurant before—there was an entire menu of drinks!
Multiple kinds of beers, ales, wines, juices, and so on!
Granted, serving alcohol to miners on their lunch break was a really bad idea… But there was room for more variety!
From what Hazel had seen, each Lilyburger was exactly the same: meat on a bun, with ketchup and a pickle, and the customer’s choice of whether or not to add cheese.
This could hardly be called a restaurant with only one entree!
And delicious as the fries were, there was only one serving size!
Hazel had eaten every last fry herself, but she had felt like it was maybe a bit too much. Normally, she would have eaten less. And a lot of the miners around could probably have eaten more.
Portion sizes!
Hazel was full of ideas.
She thought they were good ideas!
She was a young woman full of good ideas who wanted to change the world immediately!
The God of Middle Managers up in heaven did the Scream pose!
And so, Hazel came up to the cart, and…
“H-here’s the plate back.”
She returned her plate!
“Oh, thanks! Gods bless!” Lily said before she turned around and realized Hazel wasn’t one of the miners. “Oh!”
This was unexpected.
Someone who wasn’t a miner was here?
Lily tried to remember, but she’d been so busy it was all she could do to sell her burgers and fries and write down each sale in the ledger.
“Uh, uhm…” Hazel said, suddenly unsure how to begin. There was too much on her mind!
Ideas for improving Lily’s restaurant. Questions about the cart, and the menu, and how Lily became a chef… it all whirled around in the her mind like a hurricane.
“Uh…”
“Did you like the Lilyburger?” Lily asked.
Indeed, Mr. Ghost Mac had advised her just now to get customer feedback!
“Customer feedback is really important! That’s how you know how to serve your customers better, and make more sales in the future!”
“That’s right,” Mr. Ghost Rich added, “even just listening to the feedback makes customers happy, because they like to be heard. Listening to customer feedback, and doing so actively, is a big part of customer service!”
Lily, once again, realized that business could be really complicated!
Her father just dug up metal out of the ground.
From what he said, it sounded really simple!
Why did business have to be so complicated?
Still, she was making more money doing this than she had doing chores.
Maybe… that had something to do with it…
But first, she had to focus on the customer’s feedback!
The pretty older girl who had brought back the plate… started talking really fast!
“The buns and the beef patty were really good, but I think the slice of pickle was just a little too small compared to the overall size of the sandwich. It would have been better, perhaps, to have two slightly smaller slices, or one bigger slice. Also, I noticed that all the Lilyburgers come with pickles already on them, what do you do about customers who don’t like the pickle—”
“They can just take the pickle off themselves,” Mac grumbled.
Hazel continued, “—and while ketchup is a good choice what about other kinds of condiments? Mayonnaise might be good, or barbecue sauce, or steak sauce. And there are other things you could add to the sandwich as well. My Mom and I like lettuce on our sandwiches and I think it would go really well with the burger, because it would create a fresher mouthfeel and brighten up the flavors and create an interesting mix of textures with each bite…”
On and on she went!
“And why do you only sell lemonade? There are other kinds of drinks you could be selling, I really think it’s a big part of a restaurant—” Again, Hazel had never been to a restaurant in her life. “—to have multiple drink options, and multiple entree options, and to customize each dish to the customer’s palate! In fact, I didn’t see you cook any food at all the entire lunch break!”
Lily’s head was spinning!
The miners usually just said her food was yummy!
And then when she ran out, they’d ask her to make more the next day!
This was a lot for an eight year old to take in all at once!
The ghosts of the WcDonald brothers, however…
Were smiling and nodding!
“Ah, this girl gets it!” they said.
Eventually, a few minutes later, Hazel finished her epic critique of Lily’s Burgers and Fries!
“Overall I’d give your restaurant here four stars, because the creativity is really quite something, but you should really have more options: more entrees, more drinks, and more customization for each customer.”
Four out of five stars!
The God of Cuisine up in heaven folded his arms and nodded. “That’s a fair review,” he complimented Hazel.
Everyone else booed!
“What are you talking about?! She didn’t give Lily any points for cuteness!”
“Nor did she note Lily’s Piety!”
“How is Lily supposed to cook up steaks for each individual miner before their lunch break ends?”
“She wants to change too many things all at once!” the God of Middle Managers cried.
Back down in the mortal realm, Lily’s head was spinning, but she focused!
She got a hold of herself.
Customer service!
She smiled brightly up at the older girl. “Thanks so much for the feedback! Lily will take that all into consideration! I hope you’ll come back again!”
Hazel perked up.
“I can… come back again?”
“Yeah!” Lily answered with a smile.
“Isn’t this restaurant just for the miners?”
“Hmmm… Not really,” Lily said. She looked up into the empty air next to her for a moment, then turned back to Hazel. “This is just where there was a good market gap.”
Hazel didn’t know what market gap meant!
Neither did Lily, for the most part!
“But, to be honest… it’s maybe too much. I can’t make enough food to serve all the hungry mister miners every day…”
The ghosts had been urging Lily to make more food in the mornings, but she could only wake up so early, and there was only so much time. She could only carry so much ingredients in her little arms, and only make so many Lilyburgers before lunchtime. And she certainly couldn’t cook more while she was busy selling them to the hungry miners.
The cat who had been napping nearby perked up. “Yeah, she doesn’t even have time to make me my own french fries!”
Hazel glanced at the talking cat, then looked at the cart. It really was ingenious. It was super specialized, with just what was needed to make Lilyburgers and french fries, and nothing else.
“How did you come up with this idea, anyway? The cart, and the recipes. I’ve never heard of french fries before…”
“Oh!” Lily said. “The God of Death sent ghosts to tell me the recipe!”
