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6.6

🕑 Added 2023-05-25 12:24:53 +0000 UTC

Comments

Temple (REND)

- Yeah, it'd be good if Domino and Deen would interact. I got some new ideas on this because of your suggestion. Thanks! - I do want to give world building more space this time around, and less fighting. Yeah, it'll be great to see character relationships. I should develop the team better. I was thinking of rushing the cruise to get to Red Island, but maybe we should have more chapters in the cruise to see that characters before going to the Red Island. - thanks for the suggestions! There's no problem with your English

Temple (REND)

- Thanks for the help proofreading! Edited it a bit. - Maybe strand Erind on the island? With her bad sense of direction, Erind might start swimming across the Pacific and end up in Hawaii. XD - It's all too neat and tidy. - Hmmm... that's true, we should have more team interaction. I'll brainstorm on that.

PHBelonia

In general the arc is being very interesting in terms of the main story, anchored by the end of the previous arc, at this point in my view there is no faction that is really "good" or "evil" so I'm curious to know which way Erind will end up going since she has no attachment or loyalty to any group, as for the character's personal arcs I think it would be really cool to see the interactions between Erind and Denn in view of Erind's recent emotions, as well as seeing, from what I understand of Domino's powers, the way Denn would see her. about the arc i personally would like to see an arc maybe focused on world building and character relationships, letting the main story rest a bit, maybe a smaller arc. but just to make it clear, to this day I haven't seen any problems with any of the story arcs or the way they were told, so I'm sure that regardless of the path the story will not disappoint. keep up the great work and sorry for the english, it's not my first language either. 😁

OmniHumanist

Typos: “I heard from Vanessa that you do have, at least, someinsights of the Supplier’s… what did you call it? Designs?” -> “I heard from Vanessa that you do have, at least, some insights of the Supplier’s… what did you call it? Designs?” (Note: In the previous sentence, Big Marcy states "But I have no insight as to the Supplier’s designs.” There seems to be a contradiction here, maybe reword what either Erind or Big Marcy are saying?) “She mentioned that you think my friendsand the Supplier are connected. Care sharing your insights?” -> “She mentioned that you think my friends and the Supplier are connected. Care sharing your insights?” ----- But from my short interaction with Big Marcy, he had contingency plans for that too. -> It'll be interesting to see what these are. “Here is the unexpected part, Ms. Hartwell—each of them faces a small group of super-powered humans. The mother of all coincidences?” -> Or maybe the Professor has spies within the Supplier's ranks. Please share your ideas on how we can make this cruise and the Red Island trip different from the fights of previous Arcs. -> You could probably make this very team-oriented. Have Dario's team work with Red Hood and/or Pino. It could also be some nice development for Dario's group. Thanks for the chapter!


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