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[REND] B2. 8.3 - The Gangsters and the Sister

🕑 Added 2025-11-14 12:59:46 +0000 UTC

Comments

Temple (REND)

Good point. I'll edit that part because it didn't convey what I wanted. It's more that Erind was annoyed that the Adumbrae didn't follow the script. Erind doesn't really care about the seeding and the reflection stuff like that. They are very important, but it's not what Erind wanted out of the conversation. The info might prove useful in the future, of course. I'll change it. Thanks!

Temple (REND)

Thanks for the encouraging words!

No Name

Hmm... you know, if you are trying to portray Erind as smart, "I didn’t get anything from her, but she surely did get a lot of information from me." isn't really a good perspective to go with for Erind here. The adumbrae is talking in a cryptic manner, but it (provided it is not explicitly aiming to decieve and conceal, which would be risky depending on what Erind could potentially know ahead of time) is volunteering critical information on how adumbrae "seeding" and their connection with the human realm actually works. This is information which could turn perception of the physical world and adumbrae upside down if correct... It is exactly the kind of information Erind needs, given freely, so having Erind completely fail to notice doesn't exactly work towards an image of her as particularly smart...

민설

Miles better than the original man, you have really improved, this might be in my opinion, your best chapter yet.

Temple (REND)

That's some of it, yes. And we'll see some more of Kelsey's motivations in the next chapter.

Temple (REND)

Yep, and this is a learning opportunity for Erind. This'll be part of her character development, given that she won't really change her personality and other aspects. She might be too petty and spiteful to learn her lesson though, lol.

Temple (REND)

- Erind already failed the dialogue options though. - I wanted to have smart characters in the story, but they're tough to write lol. - Erind could've tried with that excuse, but it's still a problem that Erind brought up the name Kelsey first. We're not sure, but Adumbrae addressing each other probably won't lead with that. - Erind just being petty. And it's also funny that it does seem outwardly that Erind is trying to save Kelsey. - Maybe Dario's org did try to help Kelsey before? - Lol, ExK incoming - Kelsey flashback yeah, probably the Core merged with an Adumbrae doing something? Or maybe Kelsey herself reaching out? We'll find out in the future. - Thanks for the help proofreading and sharing your thoughts!

Temple (REND)

Mothercore is thirdwheeling haha

Temple (REND)

Probably not in the jjk sense. Given that the worlds can reset, it's probably in that sense that Adumbrae sees it like this.

Temple (REND)

Thanks for your support!

Critical Bum

I think Erind suffers from the same mistake she sees in other people. She doesn't assume someone would manipulate her because she's used to being the one manipulating others. It's why the tower cop managed to trick her into falling for his trap. It's alot like light yagami losing to L in their initial confrontation.

Critical Bum

I'm trying to reread and see if I can understand Kelsey's perspective. It seems that after noticing Erind's odd scent she was trying to figure out who was in control mentally. Mentioning Kelsey's name made it obvious she knew her human identity, and that her human identity was tied to the reason she wanted to talk. When Erind went with the anti PCM proposal, it contradicted the fact that Erind wanted to talk to Kelsey the human. Kelsey started asking circular questions to pressure Erind into dropping her lies. Kelsey's main question is "what is Erind?", so when Erind puts up another face to try and manipulate with she pushes the conversation in the direction of Myra and the artificial cores. Then the her telekinesis thing happens.

ARIMA Maroon

Typos: She knew she was in danger, yet she thought it fine that I, another Adumbrae, could get close to her. -> She knew she was in danger, yet she thought it was fine that I, another Adumbrae, could get close to her. But you didn’t drag conceding defeat, which keeps our game… a game. -> But you didn’t drag out conceding defeat, which keeps our game… a game. ----- This was like the dating simulator that one of my annoying younger cousins made me play. He asked me for help because I supposedly knew how to talk to girls. But I had no intentions of dating girls, so I sucked at the game, picking the wrong things to say. In contrast, it appeared that I was winning the game with Adumbrae Kelsey. -> Is this an admission that Erind is planning on dating Kelsey lol? I knew Adumbrae could eat each other, so Kelsey might be wary of that. Or were Adumbrae just introverts, not wanting friends? -> Maybe this Adumbrae will like the other way of eating, you know like in ExD. “You knew I was human since I mentioned Kelsey.” I was pissed off at my mistake and cautious of this smart Adumbrae. But I was also happy for the rare opportunity to use Rule #8—Once a face is torn, don't insist on wearing it again. -> Nice to see Kelsey's Adumbrae as smart. I could come up with a bunch of excuses to try to tape this face back together, like I got the information about Kelsey from the PCM scientists, or maybe my men hacked a database or whatnot, but that was against Rule #8. -> To be fair, this excuse could have worked if Erind never admitted to making a mistake. Erind could have said that she got the info from a PCM database instead of admitting that None of the PCM called her Kelsey. Kelsey has no way of verifying this. She could maybe assert that she never told her name to the PCM, but Erind could counter that the PCM has the technological capabilities to identify her. I don’t care. -> I like how for a conventional MC this would be taken as they are trying all their hardest to save Kelsey, but for Erind she just wants to annoy Kelsey the Adumbrae. “Dario and the Professor might kill me. The PCM is searching for me. And… you… Why are you here?” -> Kelsey knows who the Professor is, interesting. As I stepped back, I felt the invisible thing push aside my shotgun and continue to my chest. -> Kelsey's already touching Erind's chest. It looks like Erind truly made the correct choices for the dating Kelsey route. It will be interesting to see how Kelsey reacts to Erind being both an Adumbrae and a Corebring. And then Kelsey can put together that is how Erind got rid of the machine since she was part Corebring. A burst of memories not my own flooded my mind. -> Kelsey flashback? Also why did Erind get memories here? Can Kelsey transfer them? Both of them had layers of plans going on in their heads. Not to mention evolving assumptions about each other. This is far from Death Note levels of confrontation, but I did what I can -> I think you did pretty well! Thanks for the chapter!

Marquess

Well that certainly went well lol. The points Kelsey(?) brings up are interesting, though. If adumbrae are as connected to 'their' individual as it seems, what is the Mothercore doing?

Critical Bum

This went as badly as I thought, but new info on the core seems great. And the Adumbrea view themselves as the original. Reminds me of cursed spirits from jjk, but I'm curious to see if Adumbrea really did come first.

Vaporus

Excellent writing, good stuff!


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