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[REND] B2. 11.3 - A New Roommate

🕑 Added 2025-12-02 13:25:40 +0000 UTC

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Temple (REND)

Whoops, my bad there. I recall that I wavered in this line, wondering if I should make Erind remember the memories of Kelsey or not. I'll stick to Erind remembering them. As for the story with the Adumbrae, I didn't intend for Erind to do some manipulation there. Rather, she's just avoiding telling the truth, which was the Teflon meeting and so on. That's going to be too complicated to explain. What I'd do here is retain the simple story that Erind intended to make them her minions (instead of the Teflon story), adding your reasoning about using the gangsers for the future. Thanks for that!

Temple (REND)

Whoops. You're right. Thanks for the help!

Umbra_Nex

I don't think anyone already said this but "artificial Core, uh, welder" -> wielder (welder is like weld metal)

No Name

"A lie, according to my bullshit detector. She hesitated for a second." -> Rather than needing a bullshit detector, Erind explicitly saw Kelsey kill her parents, didn't she? "I revealed to them that I was an Adumbrae..." -> Weird direction to lie. Doesn't make sense for them to call her boss with this, or for them to show up in force, if Erind was dealing with the PCM for them as a trade. Also, Kelsey admitted to being awake during the return trip with Overdrive, meaning she heard them planning for the future. If Erind plans to make use of Kelsey as a pawn in the underworld later, the truth would be more useful: Erind knows, as an adumbrae, she might have to go into hiding at any time. Preparing an organization to assist at that time among the demographic that cares the least about (nominally) non-hostile adums is just clever. Heck, Erind could spin it to look like she was planning to arrange a support organization for adumbrae she saved. After all, many of them wouldn't be able to have a normal life afterwards; even a missing individual not suspected of adum would raise eyebrows suddenly reappearing.

Temple (REND)

Thanks for the help proofreading! I'll reread this and make the dialogue more in line with the previous chapter. I'll edit it when I have time later. Thanks for pointing that out!

Temple (REND)

They were talking about the start of the story. After the service for those who died during the Adumbrae attack, Deen and Erind were kidnapped by the 2Ms, the purple mohawk guy.

Temple (REND)

Thanks for your support!

ARIMA Maroon

Typos: “Right now?” Kelsey’s case bristled for a moment before flattening into an almost smooth texture. -> “Right now?” Kelsey’s scales bristled for a moment before flattening into an almost smooth texture. (I think you meant scales, because I'm not sure what case is referring to here.) ----- But I wasn’t going to advertise that the Core was the source of the ‘cure’. I’d make everyone believe that everything was exclusively the power of my mannequin form. -> This will work on everyone but Kelsey since Erind told her last chapter the Core was part of what affected her. Although, Erind knows that Kelsey will never get a Core because Dario wouldn't give one willingly to an Adumbrae, so Erind is the best bet that Kelsey has. “Yet, you’re far stronger than me.” -> Kelsey should probably guess that Erind's Core has something to do with it. Otherwise, why else would Erind be stronger so quickly? However, I wasn’t that annoyed by her touch. Perhaps the inhuman scales fooled my inherent disgust at physical contact with other humans. Kelsey also didn’t feel warm like a human. -> Clearly, this means the universe wants ExK and is giving them an excuse to touch each other. I mentioned that the Core did not affect me. Kelsey didn’t buy that, but I was firm in my supposed observation. What was Kelsey going to do? Call me a liar? -> This contradicts what Erind said last chapter. Erind said that "I just tried my best to find you mind somewhere in there and the artificial Core-". Clearly Erind indicated that the Core was capable of doing stuff. Another fucking lie! I viewed some of your memories. Or were those the Adumbrae’s memories? Either way, Kelsey wasn’t truthful to me for some reason. -> Pot meet kettle. It'll be fun to see how this game goes. Next chapter, I think we'll have a Myra POV to switch things up. -> It'll be fun to see Myra keep trying to search for Kelsey and never find her. Thanks for the chapter!

Vaporus

Excellent writing, good stuff!

Critical Bum

Amber got kidnapped!? Lol


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