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[GUtW]—❈—07:: Ramen and an annoying Sensei
🕑 Added 2023-04-25 21:27:58 +0000 UTCHow the hell did I end up here? I wonder, staring at the steaming bowl of ramen before me.
“Eat up,” Teuchi Ichiraku, the eponymous owner of “Ramen Ichiraku”, Naruto’s favourite place in the whole wide world, says with a close-eyed smile.
“Thanks for the meal, gramps,” Naruto says, digging into his with gusto.
No, seriously, I ask myself again, how the hell did I end up here?
When I’d suggested that we get lunch, I’ll admit that I hadn’t had a specific location in mind. Even so, that doesn’t mean that I’d wanted to come to a ramen stand.
I don’t eat ramen; it’s not very nutritious and I can never cook the damn thing right. I don’t really even like the taste. Yet somehow, Naruto has convinced me to come here.
I observe the boy who’s currently slurping up brothy noodles faster than a vacuum (to the visible disgust of Sakura on my other side) and quietly reevaluate my opinion of him.
Clearly, Naruto can be rather persuasive when he wants to be.
“Well, what are you two waiting for?” Ichiraku asks Sakura and I, seeing as we’re not eating. “Go on, it’s better when it’s hot.”
Right, because everyone knows that a change in temperature makes all the difference, I think but don’t say.
At least the dish smells appealing, and I suppose it’s reasonable to assume that Ichiraku can make ramen much better than I can, considering he’s still in business after all these years.
Picking up my chopsticks, I take a bite.
Huh. Not bad.
A far cry from the ambrosia Naruto heralds it as, but that’s only to be expected.
As though he can tell that my opinion of his food is complimentary, or at least not negative, Ichiraku’s smile grows brighter.
“So, you’re Naruto’s teammates, huh?” Ayame, the daughter of the owner, asks as we eat.
She already knows this, as Naruto had introduced both Sakura and I when we first arrived, but I suppose this is the making of small talk that most people really enjoy to do.
I don’t really get it. At all. And while people think that it’s because of the trauma from what... what Itachi did to me, it isn’t. I’ve simply never been one for small talk.
Though I will admit that I became a lot more averse to talking in general after it.
Despite how much I’m sure any reminder of her new status as Naruto’s teammate must rankle Sakura, she just can’t help but try to be polite to the older, civilian girl.
“Um, yes, we are,” Sakura says. “Team Seven.”
“Ah,” Ayame sighs and shakes her head in an overly dramatic manner. “To think little Naruto is now a ninja of The Leaf,” she says.
Tell me about it. They’ll accept anyone these days.
“That’s right,” Naruto says with a wide grin, “I’m a ninja now, so you can’t keep calling me ‘little’ anymore. In fact, from now on you should call me big brother.”
Ayame almost spits blood.
“Big brother, huh?” she asks.
In a ‘flash’ (that simply reminds me of how physically pathetic civilians are) Ayame locks Naruto in a headlock and begins to rub her knuckle against his head.
“How’s this, big brother?” she asks as Naruto ‘struggles’ futilely, pleading for mercy.
Sakura giggles at their antics, but I simply stare.
Caleb’s memories had informed me that Naruto is close with the Ichiraku family, but actually seeing it is a whole other thing.
For as far back as I’m aware, practically everyone within proximity of Naruto either ignores him, avoids him, dislikes him, despises him, or doesn’t give two shits about him.
Seeing people who actually enjoyspending time with the boy is... bizarre.
In the story it was because they didn’t care that he was a jinchūriki, but here, I’m not so sure. Mostly because I find it highly unlikely that Naruto is, in fact, a jinchūriki.
Having a super-powerful rage demon with extremely poisonous chakra sealed inside a baby may seem like a reasonable, or even, cool idea in a cartoon for teenage civilian boys, but in real life, that kind of thing is simply idiotic.
And besides, I’ve used my sharingan on Naruto dozens of times, and not once have I ever seen so much as a trace of something as noticeable as The Nine Tails.
Moreover, even in the rather unlikely event that Naruto is The Nine-Tailed Beast’s container, how retarded would The Hokage need to be to announce it to the village entire?
I cut off the thought there.
Ever since getting these memories, thinking about The Hokage has come with a spider web of emotions that I feel ill-prepared to navigate.
Tuning back in to the goings-on around me, I find that Ayame is now asking Sakura for embarrassing stories about her ‘big brother’.
Stories that the kunoichi gladly supplies in bulk, to her teammate’s great consternation.
Naruto really should have known what he was signing himself up for when he brought Sakura here.
We stay at Ramen Ichiraku long past when our meal ends.
It’s the middle of the day, business is slow, and with both father and daughter available, there’s always someone to bring up some new topic for Sakura and Naruto to discuss while the other serves the customers.
In the end, almost an hour passes before I put an end to it, deciding that I’ve wasted enough time sitting here.
Honestly, a big part of why I even allowed it to go on this long is because of how much Sakura has warmed up to Naruto in that time.
Apparently, with Ayame and Teuchi serving as buffers for her, Sakura finds Naruto significantly more tolerable.
She even laughed at a few of his jokes. Laughed!
Nevertheless, I’ve got training to do; it’s not like Itachi will suddenly drop dead all by himself...
Unless that part of the story is right and he is si—
I cut off the thought.
“Let’s meet tomorrow,” I tell my teammates after paying for the meal. “Seven AM. The Uchiha Compound.”
Sakura nods, and Naruto doesn’t disagree or question my authority, so I assume he agrees too.
The others say goodbye to Teuchi and Ayame, thanking them for the meal I paid for, then as we leave, Naruto says; “Hey, Sakura, want to come with me to—”
I stop him right there.
“Naruto, she just spent an hour with you and your friends,” I say. “Take the win.”
He looks mutinous at first, but then he seems to actually think about it, putting that criminally underused brain of his to work.
“Fine,” he pouts, then says; “See you tomorrow, Sakura,” before running off, that horrid orange jumpsuit of his shining like a beacon in the afternoon sun.
Sakura sighs in relief. “Thank you, Sasuke,” she says. “I really don’t know why he still bothers, I’m never going to go out with him.”
Of course not. You’d rather bug my life, I think as I begin to walk.
Sakura follows me.
“So, um, Sasuke,” she begins, and I stop and give her a look.
Say the words. I dareyou.
Sakura pauses.
“Um,” she hesitates, then swallows. “See you tomorrow,” she says finally before quickly walking away.
Good girl. I nod, then I head home to the place that hasn’t felt like home for a long time.
—❈—
The Uchiha Compound is a large, fenced in plot of land with dozens of houses and lots of empty space.
It isn’t the largest clan compound in The Leaf, or even one of them, but it was more than big enough for the almost one-hundred people who used to live in it, and much too big for the one boy who resides here now.
I had told myself, when I made the decision to do so, that living here was a good idea; that it would keep my hate fresh...
It has kept my hate fresh.
I walk into the building that used to house my family. It’s empty. Quiet. Like the rest of this place.
I take off my sandals.
A blast of killing intent hits me as I step through the door.
Instantly on guard, I activate my sharingan and—
Are you fucking kidding me!?
“‘Sup,” Kakashi Hatake, my jōnin-sensei, says in greeting.
I scowl. “What are you doing here? Don’t you have a cute neighbour to help to get away with murder?” I ask, letting him know that I understood his stupid joke back on The Academy rooftop.
Kakashi tilts his head at me in perfect confusion, then his lone visible eye widens suddenly as he gasps dramatically, even clapping his cheeks for extra effect.
Caleb’s memories call it The Home Alone face.
“That’s why her boyfriend has been missing,” he cries out.
Okay, I don’t have the time for this nonsense.
“What do you want, Kakashi?” I ask bluntly.
The jōnin sighs. “You’re no fun,” he says, the mask over his lips bending in a way that heavily suggests that he’s pouting.
I resist the urge to growl.
Kakashi chuckles. “I just wanted to tell you good job with your team today,” he says. “Even if your attempting to manipulate them is rather short-sighted.”
I blink at the man.
He was watching.
“Why don’t you try actually getting along with them?” Kakashi continues. “It’s a lot harder, but trust me, it’s better for everyone in the long run.”
Noticing that he’s waiting for a response, I give the only one that I know is available to me; I nod.
And I mean it too. This is him asking nicely. That won’t last forever.
“Good, good,” Kakashi says. “We wouldn’t want to—” the jōnin’s eye suddenly widens like he spots something strange behind me. “What the hell is that!?” He points.
My sharingan, still active, picks up every available clue from my environment and informs me of a truth that I was already aware of; Kakashi Hatake is full of shit.
I stare at the jōnin, utterly unamused. “The fact that you think that you can play that stupid prank on me, especially when I have the sharingan active, says more about you than—” something hits me on the back of the head.
What the fuck!?
I turn around, seeking what hit me, only to find nothing.
Behind me, Kakashi giggles, and I spin in a rage to... find no one.
I look around.
My sharingan is still active; I can see every speck of dust, every colour, predict the shifting of the wind, but I can’t find Kakashi Hatake.
What the fuck?
