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TSSITWON Chapter 19: I Don't Want to Die
🕑 Added 2024-09-03 11:30:08 +0000 UTC"Aoki, back to one!" Sakumo shouted with a firm tone that made Aoki's heart race.
Aoki felt frustrated, but he couldn't resist. "Uh, alright," Aoki replied softly, fatigue beginning to creep into his body. He could only obey Sakumo's orders and start over from the beginning.
At first, the mistakes Aoki made were just small errors, but as time went on, exhaustion began to take over his body. After all, Aoki was still a child, and he had very little chakra, far below the standard of a typical ninja. Every time Aoki felt tired, he made more mistakes, and each time that happened, he had to start all over again.
This situation was frustrating. Anger and despair began to creep in, making Aoki feel extremely upset. However, Aoki knew that this was a small test he had to pass if he wanted to survive in this harsh world.
‘Huhh... I have to endure. No pain, no gain,’ Aoki thought, trying to remember wise words to encourage himself. ‘Damn, this hurts so much. I wish I could just stop! But… that’s just an impossible wish. I have to get stronger to keep surviving.’
With growing determination, Aoki continued to swing his sword, even as the pain in his arms and legs intensified.
The insane training Aoki was undergoing made the thought of giving up constantly nag at him. Every time Aoki felt his body could no longer go on, visions of death appeared in his mind—his own death, over and over again.
This nightmare seemed to remind Aoki of the grim fate that awaited him if he showed weakness. It scared him, yet it forced Aoki to push forward.
Aoki knew he couldn't give up. Every time the pain peaked and his body nearly collapsed, that vision of death returned, urging him to endure.
Aoki's whole hand trembled, and the muscles in his calves, thighs, and arms screamed in agony. The afternoon had turned into night, just seconds before the sun completely set. Yet, Aoki still hadn't finished counting his sword swings.
“966…”
“973…”
“986…”
“990…”
“999… 1000.” Finally, Aoki swung the sword one last time, and with all the strength he had left, he immediately released his grip. Aoki's body collapsed to the ground, exhausted.
There was no energy left to stand, not even to sit. Aoki's entire body felt like it was being pierced by a thousand needles, every inch of him screaming in pain. This was the first time Aoki felt such excruciating pain that he wanted to cry.
However, Aoki held back. He wouldn't let his tears fall, not in front of Sakumo. Aoki didn't want to be seen as a weak child or someone with a fragile resolve. So, Aoki suppressed his tears deep inside, biting his lip hard enough to draw blood. But the pain in his lip was nothing compared to the suffering coursing through his body.
Sakumo sat beside Aoki, looking at the young boy lying helplessly on the ground. The sky was dark, with only a little light left from the sun that had set. Sakumo glanced at Aoki, who was gasping for breath.
"You managed to finish this in one day?" Sakumo's voice was calm, yet there was an underlying admiration. "I thought you would need a few days. It seems your determination is stronger than I expected. But tell me, Aoki, why do you want to do this?"
"I... I don't want to die. Not just because I'm afraid of death itself, but more because I'm afraid of dying helpless—unable to do anything. That is my greatest fear," Aoki said, his voice trembling yet filled with determination. "If I lose my hands, then I will fight with my feet. If my legs can't be used, I will bite them with my teeth. And if even that is not enough, I will curse them with all my soul."
