QuiteTheSlacker
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[The Distinguished Mr. Rose] Chapter 12: I Will Be Special
🕑 Added 2025-03-05 18:19:43 +0000 UTCThe young Jack hobbled along as the two carefully embarked on their solitary journey. Sweat dripped down his brow, and his face was permanently fixed into a scowl. It looked like the man would collapse at any moment, yet nonetheless he persevered and followed after Lucius.
Jack was hopeful, at first. He claimed that leveling up could possibly reset his physical state, similarly to what happened to Mister Bernardi during the orientation, but alas his efforts were in vain. Only his status points rose; his arm remained unchanged.
On and on they wandered, yet their companions were nowhere to be seen. Lucius had a mental clock he always made sure to keep running, counting every second in his head, and by this point many hours had come to pass. If it was early morning when Lucius was first sucked into this game, then it would now be late into the evening. There was no way to know if the day cycle was the same in this foreign realm, but whether it be bright or dark, all humans needed to sleep eventually.
Jack tried to fight it. Even when his eyelids began to droop, and his head swung back and forth in a daze, he gritted his teeth and pushed on. The man had stayed alert and on edge for nearly half a day straight. It was not just physical wounds that burdened him, but also ailments of the mind. He was slowly crumbling from the inside.
“Mister Thames, would you like to take a break?” Lucius asked. “You really do not seem well.”
Jack replied with a wobbly tone. “No, it’s fine. I can handle it. Let’s just keep moving forward. We have to find Marco and Mili… we have to…”
The man was hanging by a thread. Yet, there was an obsession in his bloodshot eyes: crazed, manic, bordering on sheer insanity. To Jack, it was as if his entire world would collapse if he did not find the others, and perhaps that was true. He depended on their company more than he himself knew.
Jack was almost ready. All he needed was a little push.
“Mister Thames,” Lucius said, crouching down until the two were at eye level. “This cannot continue.”
Jack hesitated and fiddled with his cast. “What do you mean?”
“You can hardly even take a step. If you push yourself any further, then I’m afraid you will reunite with the others as a corpse. You know this more than anyone else.”
The young man turned away, unwilling to look Lucius in the face. “I just didn’t want to be a burden.”
“Is one’s worth solely based on how much they contribute?”
He didn’t answer.
“I am, frankly, a bit upset,” Lucius continued. “Did you think me a scoundrel callous enough to be irritated by such matters? If that is how you saw me, then I really must wonder if there is something wrong with the way I present myself.”
“No, of course not!” Jack said. “You’re a great guy, Lucius. Honestly, you’re so flawless that I can’t help but feel a bit self-conscious at times. You’re always so calm and dignified, and you look after us so naturally that I don’t even notice it at times—like patting my back when I feel sick or dusting off my clothes when I get dirty. You’re sociable and can make someone feel welcome with just a few words. You’re gentle, and kind, and understanding even when the person you’re talking to is a complete ass. And when I realized that I was that ass, that I’m the one dragging you down, I just feel so… useless.”
Jack sighed and leaned on the wall. He looked down at his shredded arm, and his bloody clothes, and to his hand that could not stop trembling no matter how hard he tried.
Lucius listened to him, moving not a step until Jack had let out all he wanted to say. When he was finally done, the gentleman promptly hoisted him onto his back.
“W-What are you—”
“You are mistaken about something, Mister Thames,” Lucius said, carrying Jack along despite the latter’s protest. “Why would you ever think that you were dragging me down?”
Jack stuttered in surprise. “I mean… aren’t I? If I wasn’t here, you would’ve been able to search for the others a lot faster. Heck, if you went solo you probably could’ve found the exit all on your own.”
Jack went on, burying himself further and further in his own self-deprecation, but before all that doom and gloom, Lucius only chuckled. “That is precisely what I mean. You speak as if reuniting with our fellows is my main objective, and while I do worry for their safety, the one I am most concerned about is you, Mister Thames.”
“Me?” he asked. “But why would you…”
“Why would I not?” Lucius replied. “Rather than fuss over those I cannot see, I would rather prioritize the well-being of my friend within reach.”
“Friend?” Jack’s eyes went wide.
“Yes, Mister Thames. I consider you my friend. Do you not think the same?”
“N-No, I… wait, I mean yes. Yes, I do. I really do.”
Lucius smiled. “Then all is well. A friend does not need a reason to care for another. No matter how frail or injured you become, I will always be there to lend a helping hand.”
For a moment, not a word was spoken between the two. Lucius could see Jack searching for something to say, but the man was too choked up, holding back tears he desperately wished to hide. It was a wonder how such simple words could touch him so - Jack must have lived a very lonely life.
“Now, why don’t we find a spot to rest?” Lucius said. “Perhaps your luck can find us another treasure room. It would be safer than mingling about in the hall.”
Jack chuckled. “Can’t give you any promises, but I’ll try my best.”
After a little roaming, the two of them found an ideal shelter for the (metaphorical) night. The room was similar to the ones they had come across before, but sadly there were no flowers. Oh, and in the place of an equipable item was instead a potion that permanently raised a chosen stat by two. Jack wanted to save it, because of course he did, but Lucius pressured him into increasing his endurance. Whether it would actually aid in his recovery was yet to be seen, but that was what experiments were for. Better he tried it now than regret down the road.
Jack sank to the floor in relief. He looked much less tense now, less on guard. It was the perfect time for a heart-to-heart talk. Fortunately, Lucius didn’t need to do anything; Jack took the initiative all on his own.
“It’s, um, weird how nice you are to someone like me. I never understood why you chose to make the first move. Y’know, back when we first met.”
“Oh? I thought I made my reasoning clear,” Lucius said. “I saw in you something unique, Mister Thames. When everyone else was confused, you alone remained calm. Confident.”
Jack lowered his head in embarrassment. “Hah, yeah I guess so. Confident… I’d say it was more delusion than anything else. Only reason I was able to stay calm was because I tricked myself into thinking I became a webnovel protagonist or something. God, it’s awkward to even think about it…”
“Webnovels? I recall you mentioning such a thing before. To be honest, I don’t remember much despite your very enthusiastic lectures.”
“Probably for the better. They're not the… well, let’s say most thought-provoking of stories.” Jack tried to be witty, but there was a hint of shame in his voice. “LitRPG, Progression, Xianxia and System Apocalypse… it’s all junk food. Power fantasies. Wish fulfillment. The protagonist obtains cheat-like powers and gets to trample on everything they don’t like. The entire world is pretty much made for them. They go on adventures, make friends, and live this perfect life while occasionally confronting some b-list villain or monster. But it’s okay because they’ll always win in the end.”
“That sounds quite formulaic,” Lucius said. “Without meaningful conflict or struggle, how will the character grow as a person?”
To that, Jack only laughed. “Not much, usually. No, it’s all about getting stronger. That’s the goal. Kill the big bad, get a power up, and then kill the next big bad. Sometimes there’ll be the occasional commentary on stuff, but rarely you’ll ever see the protagonist face any real consequences. You have to turn your brain off if you want the best reading experience.”
“If they are as you say, then why read these types of stories?”
“Because they’re fun.” Jack turned away from Lucius and stared at the corner. His cheeks were bright red. “Despite all its faults, the stories are still fun to read. They’re meant for you to self-insert yourself into the world and forget about all the crappy things happening in reality. Because real life sucks. It’s depressing, and exhausting, and sometimes you just want to escape it all and pretend for even just a little bit that you’re somewhere far happier than where you are now.”
“Are you truly satisfied with living in such a manner?”
Lucius’s words struck Jack right where it hurt. He recoiled and scrunched his face, but instead of being upset, Jack just looked tired. Tired and defeated, as if he had already asked himself that question many, many times.
“No. Not really,” he said. “Escapism is exactly that: running away from your problems. Nothing will change by doing it. You’re not moving forward or making any progress with your life. You’re just… stuck right where you’ve always been.”
Jack clenched his fist, hard. “It’s easy to make excuses. I mean, is it really that bad? I was the weird kid in school. I spent everyday by myself, no dreams or goals or passions I could turn into something actually useful, and I stayed that way even during college. I majored in business because I thought that making money and being in the corporate world would finally make me worth something. Make people actually want to be around me. Turns out, being a data analyst and working under some nepo-hire, out-of-touch boss was even more soul sucking than school. I was fucking miserable.”
“Language, Mister Thames.”
Jack coughed. “Sorry. Anyways, my life sucked. What could I possibly do now? Nothing, so I coped by reading webnovels. I imagined myself getting some generic op ability and slaughtering everyone I hated in my office. It was the only way I could be somewhat happy throughout the day, but the more I read, the more I realized just how pathetic I was. I mocked these fictional characters for being stupid, losing agency, or being anything less than perfect, because any type of ‘failure’ would break my immersion. It took me out of the story and brought me back to the real world where, instead of a hero or a god, I was just some anti-social reject. Alone. Unable to change. You’ve probably never felt this way, Lucius, but for me… the worst feeling in the world is being powerless.”
Jack was correct. Lucius had never once felt that anything was beyond his control. If a person or obstacle prevented him from indulging in his desires, then he learned the skills necessary to get rid of it. It didn’t matter what it was. He always found a way.
That didn’t mean he could not understand the plights of folk like the timid Mister Thames. But some people were more naturally inclined to stand above others. It was a matter of mindset, attitude, and confidence. One’s demeanor needed not be the same as their innate disposition; sadly, there were those too buried in their own self-pity to understand that.
“That’s why I was so excited when I first saw the status screen,” Jack continued. “It felt like I was being rewarded for all the garbage I had to go through. Here it was, a chance to finally become something else than a guy in his mid-twenties rotting his life away, and the first step in my plan was to be the cool and confident leader of the group. But, well, you know how that turned out. The orientation didn’t even start yet before I humiliated myself.”
“You did no such thing, Mister Thames,” Lucius blatantly lied.
“But I did. You’re too nice to get upset over things like that, Lucius, but Marco and Mili definitely looked at me like I was a bug back then. You managed to help me patch things up, but ever since I’ve had this… fear. I’m scared of disappointing them, and I don’t want our party to split up because of something I caused. You’re all really good people. Marco was intimidating at first, but he’s a warm guy. Mili’s a bit too hyper for me sometimes, but she has this charm that draws people to her. And, well, I think I’ve already said plenty about you, Lucius. If you weren’t here, I probably wouldn’t have ever snapped out of it.”
Jack yawned and slowly started to sink onto the ground. His fatigue had finally become too much, and he let out one last mumble before closing his eyes.
“I know I’m a loser, but even someone like me can change. One day, I will… I will…”
Jack didn’t get to finish. That was just fine. Lucius already knew what he was going to say.
“Sweet dreams, Mister Thames,” he said. “Do not worry. I will make sure you become more special than anyone else.”
