Laura S. Fox
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Hungry Heart - Book #4 - Ch. 23
🕑 Added 2023-02-19 18:59:01 +0000 UTCChapter One / Chapter Two / Chapter Three / Chapter Four / Chapter Five / Chapter Six / Chapter Seven / Chapter Eight / Chapter Nine / Chapter Ten / Chapter Eleven / Chapter Twelve / Chapter Thirteen / Chapter Fourteen / Chapter Fifteen / Chapter Sixteen / Chapter Seventeen / Chapter Eighteen / Chapter Nineteen / Chapter Twenty / Chapter Twenty-One / Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three – Moments of Peace
Toru placed his head in Duril’s lap and looked up at the branches above. “What did Shearah tell you?”
“What do you mean?” Duril brushed a few strands of hair away from his forehead and gave him a short, tender kiss.
“I overheard what you were telling her.” Toru hesitated for a moment. “More like what you were asking her, about the hermit and all that.”
“I see.” Duril continued to caress him slowly, as if he couldn’t just yet bring himself to breach the matter that appeared to be on everyone’s minds.
“I would never go anywhere without you. Without either of you,” Toru said directly. “But I don’t want to put you in harm’s way, either. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I did that.”
“I know. And I wish that there were some other way than having to go see the hermit. Not only does he appear to be quite the character, but there might be dangers stemming directly from seeing him. I also don’t wish you to be put in harm’s way.”
Toru pondered over his next words. “Maybe I don’t need Nelsikkar to know who I am.”
“What are you saying?”
Duril’s scrutinizing eyes made him squirm in place for a moment. After dragging his friends over half the world and back again, it seemed like such a cowardly thing to say. True heroes didn’t do that, did they? They didn’t say one thing only to take it back the following moment. But, at this point, after finding a brother and discovering so many things about himself and the world, he had to wonder if he wasn’tt wishing for too much. His father and mother were no more; they continued to exist, as he remembered them, and he would forever be grateful for their sacrifice, but what was Nelsikkar without them, anyway?
The place lived in his memory like a distant reminder of a childhood long gone. He had been happy there, but all children were happy as long as they had their parents near and didn’t have to want for food, shelter, or play.
What did it mean to have a home? He had it with him all the time, as where his friends were, his heart was, too.
“Are you trying to tell me that you’re no longer interested in finding the place where you were born?” Duril helped him when the silence between them continued to stretch.
“There might be nothing there. The place must have been destroyed. My parents and all the grownups marched on Scercendusa, right? And the rest of us were sent through the mountains to reach Niverborg. There’s nothing left, I’m sure.”
Duril appeared to consider his words and took his time. “There will always be this longing in your heart, Toru, if you decide to give up on your search for Nelsikkar. But what you wish is the most important thing to me. What makes you happy, makes me happy, as well. I don’t think I’m in the wrong when I say that I’m quite certain that Varg and Claw believe the same.”
“What is that?”
They both raised their heads at the sound of Varg’s voice. He was alone. Claw, without a doubt, was still enjoying being reunited with his dear friends.
Toru straightened up and looked the wolfshifter in the eye. “What would finding Nelsikkar bring me?”
Varg didn’t say anything for some time, just returning his stare with understanding eyes. “I, for one, would like to reach the place that gave you to the world,” he said in a gentle voice. “But, like Duril, it’s not something required for our friendship to continue. We could always use a bit of peace. But don’t forget, Toru, that those dark shards must be spread all over the world still. Since we are meant to roam the face of Eawirith for a while longer, why not do it purposefully, with an end in mind?”
Toru nodded. Varg was, indeed, wise, and his words had found their way to his heart. “Then, we should search for the way to The Scarlet Peaks.”
Varg squeezed his shoulder and smiled at him. “There’s no rush now. How about we enjoy these moments of peace we have been given?”
Toru nodded. Yes, no one said that he needed to rush back into the search for his place of birth and drag his friends along. No, not for a while, at least.
***
Varg couldn’t say he was surprised to hear Toru having second thoughts about his search for Nelsikkar. Finding his brother had given the young tigershifter a taste of home, one with people in it, people who were close to his blood and his heart. By comparison, Nelsikkar had to appear as nothing but a desolate place where there was nothing to find.
However, there was always the pull of destiny to be considered. Just like the spider thread had helped them to come back against forces that believed Niverborg was destined to remain severed from the world. It was the matter of all these invisible forces that was making Varg consider with both his heart and mind that finding Nelsikkar was tantamount to restoring order in the world.
The shards buried inside Toru’s shoulders couldn’t be overlooked, either. Even if Toru wished to give up on his adventuring to trade it for a happy, settled life, it was most probably beyond his power to make that choice just yet.
As the story he remembered from his childhood said, there were powerful beings capable of pulling at the thread of destiny as they saw fit, but that also meant that destiny couldn’t be ignored. When Duril stood and told them he wanted to search for some herbs to help Willow with the meal preparation, he remained alone with Toru.
Without even looking, he knew that the young tiger had a lot of things on his mind, and he wanted to ask them all. “Was I too harsh just now, telling you what I thought?”
“No, not at all,” Toru assured him. “I’m sure that you only want the best for me. Duril is quick to agree to whatever I ask,” he added with a snicker. “But you always set me right. You’re wise.”
“That is quite high praise, kitty,” Varg joked. “I’m happy to be of help. As for your worries that the hermit might put us all through impossible trials and tribulations on a whim, you must remember who we all are. We’re not just people who happened to be by your side in your quest to save the entire world. I like to believe that we’ve proven our mettle over and over.”
Toru nodded solemnly. “You are all very brave. And you all have endured everything by my side, the wrath of the merchants in Shroudharbor, and the merciless desert on our way through The Great Barren. And you’ve always helped me. I just want to be sure that I’m not asking for too much, when I should be happy with less.”
“I believe it’s more than finding happiness, this quest of yours to find the place where you were born. I can’t exactly tell you how my mind reached such an understanding, but all things happen for a reason, or else we wouldn’t have either sense, nor order. Hekastfet wanted to bring chaos to the world, and you stopped him. And there are many who wish to help you and do so. Such as the Sakka in Scercendusa, or even the simple people of Shroudharbor.”
“You’re right about everything,” Toru said with aplomb. “I would let everyone down if I just decided to settle down here or elsewhere and enjoy good food and my friends’ love day after day.”
Varg decided that it would be a good moment to tease Toru. “That might make you grow bored with us.”
“Never,” came the determined reply.
Varg laughed and pulled Toru into a tight hug. “You are destined for many great things, Toru. Your story is still being written. I stole a glance at Duril’s heavy tome, and I immediately noticed that there are still many blank pages to be filled. That is something to think about, is it not?”
“Yes,” Toru agreed and returned the hug. “I just wish it were possible to grab that nasty hermit by his beard and shake him until he can’t think of hurting anyone just because it’s in his power to do so.”
“We’ve faced far greater dangers in our path up to this very moment. I somehow doubt that a mere hermit, who must be an old man with his nose buried in books, can really be such a threat to us.”
Toru laughed. “Well, if these magical creatures didn’t use their tricky powers, I would take them down so easily.”
“Are you ready to join us?” Claw called for them from afar. “The food is ready.”
“I think we should go,” Varg suggested, but Toru was already on his feet, as usual, not the kind to ignore a call to join a happy party around a table.
***
There was a destiny for him out there to fulfill. Toru thought about it as Willow made sure to fill his plate and forced him into accepting the juiciest piece of the huge steak he had grilled over the fire for a while, making its fantastic smell spread everywhere.
They all treated him like he was a hero, and that was yet another reason why he couldn’t give up on his quest. With all those shards spread throughout the world, there was still evil to be vanquished. That was what he was supposed to do. Before, when he had been on his own, he would have dismissed such demands from others as nothing having to do with him. But now, he was linked with all these good people through threads that he couldn’t see, yet knew all the same they were there, unbreakable.
He wasn’t supposed to roam after their satisfying meal, but there was an ardent wish brewing inside his heart that he couldn’t simply ignore. He gently removed his arm from under Duril and began walking toward the heart of the forest, the place where that well of no return was located. Was it still there? Could he see through it to the other part of the world, where his brother lived, along with the rest of the white tigers? He wouldn’t do something as unthoughtful as going through the well again and make his friends worry. Still, he was curious if he could catch a glimpse of Niverborg if he only looked into the well.
He was soon there, in the same place, but this time, no one tried to stand in his path like they had the first time. The forest was unmoving, the shadows of the evening making the trees look larger and sleepier.
Winter was not a season for The Quiet Woods, Beast had explained to him. A long Fall followed the abundance of summer, but only to allow the grass and trees and all the undergrowth to rejuvenate. During that time, they still enjoyed the fruits of the forest, even if not in the same amounts.
He crushed a few fallen leaves that had had the time to dry up under his feet. There was indeed a reason to call this place The Quiet Woods, as the deep silence that embraced everything like a warm blanket made the occasional visitor feel as if they were protected and could fall asleep at any moment.
The well was in the same place and nothing seemed out of the ordinary. The moss had grown through the rocks more than he remembered, and there was a stillness about it that only meant that the well was now part of the forest. Could it be that it had lost its significance as a portal to a different part of the world?
Toru moved closer and looked in. The water’s surface was unmoving. A leaf fell and made the smooth mirror tremble for a moment, no longer. And then, it was calm again. He felt tempted to reach in and disturb the clear surface with his fingers.
“Has longing brought you here?”
He snapped his head up and stared at Shearah. “Lighty,” he exclaimed. “Why are you sneaking up on me like this?”
“I wanted to talk to you alone, because Duril and the others worry about the next leg of your journey.”
Toru nodded. “I will have to see the nasty hermit, whether I like it or not.”
Shearah nodded and then placed herself on the edge of the well. She appeared to be so light. If she suddenly soared like a leaf taken away by the wind he wouldn’t be surprised at all.
“I was wondering if I could see my brother if I looked into the well.”
Shearah’s laughter was bright like silver bells. “As powerful as you may be, Toru, that is not how the well works.”
“You’ve checked it yourself, then?”
She nodded. “I was curious, of course. But now, it’s nothing but a normal well. You can feel its bottom if you go into it.”
“I’ll take your word for it,” Toru said. “How will I find Niverborg, then?”
Shearah put her small hand on his shoulder. “I’m talking to my brethren, spirits of the wind, all of the time. They now know where it is. There’s no longer the need for a secret passage to get where you want to be.”
“So, where is it?” Toru asked.
Shearah pointed to the east. “It is a long journey to get there, but if you walk for weeks, following the eastern path, you will find it. I will help Duril put Niverborg on a map. Since your travels take you all over the world, you need one.”
Toru nodded. “You said you wanted to talk to me alone. What about?”
Shearah pointed at his shoulder. “I asked the other spirits of the wind what they know of such things, and I have yet to hear from some of them. But there appear to be others, indeed.”
“Are they many?”
“A few, so far.”
“Do I have to chase them down, or will I stumble upon them on my way?”
“The shards that are no longer dormant are causing problems for the people living close to them.”
“Like in the marshes. Or in Niverborg. You know, there, the shard was inside a mythical creature. I defeated it, but it was only thanks to the shard already in my shoulder that I could soar into the sky and strangle it.”
Shearah followed him with her huge luminous eyes. She seemed very interested in his account of the adventures he had been through. “How so?” she asked.
“I sprouted a pair of black wings from my shoulders,” Toru explained. “I don’t know exactly how it happened, but I wished for a way to reach Drahlung and they appeared. That is quite strange, and I know that the others fear that this dark power I happen to yield may become a danger later.”
“They might not be wrong about that,” Shearah said. “The evil you defeated obviously is trying to win through other means.”
“But it helped me defeat Drahlung. I’m talking about the shard in my shoulder, the one I got after we returned the moon back to the sky.”
“Yes, which makes me wonder,” Shearah said in a low voice. “Why would it help you? I have an answer, but I don’t know if it will be to your liking.”
“Go ahead anyway,” Toru said. He was now curious about what she meant to say.
“I think the shards feel a pull toward one another. They long to become a whole. That is why the shard you had in your shoulder offered you the help you needed when you needed it.”
Toru pondered this for a while. “But that means that I should stay clear of all the places where shards appear.”
“At the cost of letting them poison the world?” Shearah asked.
Ah, he didn’t like it when things became so complicated. His shoulders sagged. “Why does it have to be so difficult? If I start collecting them from all over the place, that means that I’m only helping Hekastfet become whole again. And if I defeat him once more, who’s to say that he won’t turn into dozens of pieces again?” He scratched his head. “That can only mean that I need to defeat him again, but in a different way.”
Shearah nodded. “I think so, as well.”
“But I don’t know what that means.”
“Not yet. But you are on your way to see Te’cla. Of what you told me that the oracle that talked to Claw and Varg said, I understand that he steals knowledge, and that’s the only thing that has any importance to him. It is possible that he also has the knowledge of how to defeat Hekastfet. Seeing how this name wasn’t even known to us here, as is probably the case with many other places in the world, who’s to say that he hasn’t also stolen the knowledge of the proper means to defeat this evil forever?”
“I can see how that could be true. In the end, I still have to go and see the hermit. Whether he knows where Nelsikkar is or not, it doesn’t even matter. I must talk to him to ask him how it is possible to rid the world of Hekastfet once and for all.”
“That has been on my mind, too. I wish I could give you something to help you in your quest, Toru, but it was only Duril I was allowed to give the gift of being able to talk to the wind.”
“He deserves it, because he’s very smart,” Toru said. “I don’t have a use for such gifts, as I was made to be strong and use my claws and fangs.”
“There’s more to you than just that, and don’t you forget it. There’s another thing I want to tell you, and then I will let you enjoy your well-deserved reprieve.”
“Go ahead,” Toru encouraged her.
“Don’t let go of your friends. Even when false voices whisper to you that you must march into the open arms of danger on your own, don’t pay them any mind. They don’t want what’s good for you. Stay true to your heart.”
“But Te’cla wants to hurt them, or at least that is what I believe,” Toru explained. “How can I allow him to do that?”
“All your friends,” Shearah said in a tone that brooked no contradiction, “are stronger than you think. Even though you may feel like you are the one who must always protect them, just remember all the times during which they helped you, too. Don’t let a mean hermit strip you of what you most love and need.”
Toru didn’t quite know what to think about Shearah’s words. If he could help it, why not protect his friends from the dangers that threatened them? Did she mean that he was supposed to let them confront a nasty hermit and his whims?
“I can only imagine what is going through your head, Toru. You believe that I’m telling you that you must ignore your friends’ safety and let the hermit have his way. But that is not what I’m telling you. I put together what you all told me about what you learned. The hermit might want to try you in different ways. Threatening your friends is one way of doing that. But is he truly as powerful as he is believed to be? As a stealer of knowledge, he might be able to influence what people think of his powers. He might want to isolate you or have you spread between your duties to tire you out.”
“Is he an enemy, like Hekastfet?” Toru asked. “Why would he want to do that to me?”
“Because he may just be a hungry creature. One hungry for knowledge, and if he believes that you are in possession of something he wants, he will try his best to feed his hunger.”
“He could just ask me, you know? Whatever he wants to know, I’ll tell him. Only that he might be very disappointed because I don’t know a lot of things. I don’t even know the letters well, and Duril is doing his best to teach me. I don’t see how the hermit would think that I’m the one with some great knowledge to hide.”
Shearah laughed again. “As boastful as some people might think you are, Toru, at the same time, you show great humility. That is also a trait of a true hero.”
“I’m just telling the truth,” he insisted, puzzled by her words.
“You are the one who defeated Hekastfet.”
“I had everyone by my side, helping,” Toru pointed out.
“Yes, that is true. But you see, Toru, a hermit has little or any idea what friendship means. After all, he disavowed the entire world to be alone and peruse all the knowledge he has been collecting for hundreds of years now. What could someone like that know about sharing the good and the bad with someone else?”
Toru stared at Shearah with wide eyes. “Lighty, you are very wise, too. Just like Varg, and Duril, and Claw. So, he’s a mean, lonely old man, isn’t he?”
“That’s one way of looking at things, of course. But it doesn’t mean that you must pity him,” she warned. “After all, it was he who chose this way of life. Be aware of his shrewdness, Toru. He will try to take something from you, something he cannot understand, and that’s a dangerous thing. And don’t think of me as too wise. I’m telling you all these things because I’ve asked the other wind spirits that have passed through here about such a man, living on top of The Scarlet Peaks.”
“Do they know the way there?”
“Yes. And they told me it, too. I will tell Duril how you can reach the foot of the mountain. As how you can climb there and reach the summit, that is not something I can help you an awful lot with. The spirits of the wind that I’ve spoken to tell me that they didn’t see any creatures getting that high. Even they had to sneak a peek to glimpse the old hermit, hidden there, in his little cave.”
“It doesn’t matter. We will get there. I will find the way to defeat Hekastfet from him. And then, I will search the world for all the shards and destroy them one by one.” As soon as he said that, he felt his shoulder jerking suddenly. He touched it and held it, squeezing tightly.
Shearah looked at him curiously. “What’s happening?”
“Nothing,” he said. “I guess the shards weren’t happy to learn what I plan to do to them. But it’s enough that when I think of them, of how they must behave, and they appear to listen. It’s not as simple as that, but I can’t explain it,” he added.
“I can imagine,” Shearah said, nodding in understanding. “Hekastfet must not have understood how powerful you truly are when confronting you the first time. As he bides his time for a second confrontation with you, it is not hard to fathom that he fears you now.”
“As he should,” Toru said with determination. “So, I really can’t use the well to look through and see my brother?” He leaned over the edge and looked in with searching eyes.
“I’m afraid not. But you will see your brother again.”
Toru was sure of it. Once he had found people to love, he wasn’t keen on letting them disappear.
***
Duril waited until Toru came back, as well as for a few moments more. A weary sigh left Toru’s mouth, and that made him believe that it would be a good idea to ask what was wrong instead of just pretending to be asleep. They had all fallen asleep around the extinguished fire, but the two of them had slept the closest, as Toru liked warmth the most.
He reached for his lover’s shoulder and touched it gently. “Where have you been?” he whispered.
“I talked to Shearah. She told me many interesting things, about the hermit, and the shards, and other things.”
Duril wrapped his arm around Toru’s. “Do you want to tell me more about it?”
It looked like Toru was no longer sleepy, and since he was also awake, they moved away together slowly, making sure not to disturb the others.
Once they were out of earshot, they sat together on a fallen trunk. Toru began talking first. “She told me something that will be quite difficult for me to do.”
“What is that? Did she want you to keep it a secret from us?”
Toru shook his head. “No, but she wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be influenced in my decisions by looking at you all and thinking that I could never allow you to be hurt in one way or another.”
“I see. Now, can you please tell me what this difficult thing you’re talking about is?” He waited patiently, while watching Toru and the various emotions playing on his face.
“You know, about the hermit and those trials he might want to put you through,” Toru began. “Shearah thinks I shouldn’t worry about you. She says that you are all strong and you also helped me so many times before while we were fighting evil everywhere.”
“We did our best to help you. We will always do the same, no matter what is asked of us. And if going through those trials is what the hermit needs so that he advises you on how to find your birthplace--”
“It’s more than that. The hermit is not only there to answer my questions about Nelsikkar. No, I will have to see him because there’s no other choice.”
Duril was surprised by how harsh Toru sounded. There was something serious going on, and he wanted nothing else but to become a part of it so that he could begin helping in any way he could.
“You see,” Toru started and touched his shoulder briefly, the one with the shards, “Hekastfet is trying to play with my mind. These shards that are part of him are searching for one another, which means that they will only help me so that they could become, once more, part of the same whole. You know, when you felt the dark power rising while I was fighting Drahlung, you weren’t wrong to fear it. Because it only helped me defeat that ugly lizard since it wanted to become reunited with a second shard.”
“I see,” Duril said slowly. That made perfect sense now. He cast his eyes down and began pondering over how things now looked in this new light. “But these shards are spread everywhere, I can only assume that they are embittering the nights and days of those who live close to them. The lady of the marshes tried something as bold as stealing the moon. Drahlung was part of what kept Niverborg severed from the world and slowly dying. He even tried to destroy the entire place.”
“Yes. Shearah told me the same thing. And that means that I can’t just forget about the shards so that they don’t become Hekastfet again. He’s pure evil. But just letting him become whole again is not something I should do either. That leaves me with the hermit and his knowledge of what I might have to do to defeat Hekastfet.”
“Does she think that the hermit knows about it?”
Toru nodded. “She can’t be certain, of course, but Te’cla has been stealing knowledge for a long time now. Who’s to say that he doesn’t also know how to defeat Hekastfet again? Maybe even before I defeat and gather all the shards.”
“It is quite a dangerous path,” Duril murmured. “I wish I knew what to tell you, Toru. I’m inclined to believe that everything Shearah told you is true. I assume that she consulted other wind spirits to learn of all this.”
“Yes. She knows the way to The Scarlet Peaks, and she’s going to help you make a map. She also told me that she knows how I will be able to get to Niverborg again. That map you’ll make with her will show us that, as well.”
Duril rubbed Toru’s shoulder in sympathy. “In other words, we will have to confront this hermit and his tricks if we want to find the answer to the most important question of all.”
“And what question might that be?” Varg towered over them suddenly, taking them by surprise.
“You have a way of sneaking up on people today,” Duril said with a laugh.
“This time, I also brought Claw with me,” Varg said. “You two snuck out, and we thought we would catch you fooling around.”
“Instead of that, however,” Claw added, “we found you deep in serious talk. Is it something you can share with us, or a secret just between the two of you?”
Toru shook his head energetically. “No, we don’t have secrets like that.”
“Indeed, we don’t,” Duril joined him.
“Save for those times when you hide the tastiest morsels to feed Toru later,” Claw said and laughed.
“Yes, save for those,” Duril admitted. “Toru, tell them what you told me. They need to know.”
He watched in silence as Toru began explaining to their other two companions about what he had learned from Shearah. Varg’s and Claw’s faces turned serious as they understood what Toru was talking about.
“At least we know we weren’t fools to fear the dark power we felt rising in the forest at Niverborg,” Claw said. “That hermit should have the answers. But if he doesn’t, we will still find them. Even if it means we need to travel to the end of the world.”
TBC
