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TGIF: Cults n Christmas
🕑 Added 2023-12-22 19:52:42 +0000 UTCHello and happy Friday, patrons! I hope you’re doing as best you can today. It’s been another whacky week in the Helbig/Morgan household, but we’re holding up okay! I washed my hair for the first time in over a week this morning! That normally relaxing activity has become a bit of an emotional roller coaster. We lost some good hairs on the wet battlefield this morning, but we also eliminated some general stank that was rising in the ranks, so we’ll consider it a win.
So far surgery recovery has been going well. My left breast is swollen and bruised, like it got itself in a bar fight a few nights ago, but it’s nothing some ice, painkillers, and a surgical bra can’t fix. The best part is that the pain is localized to one area, and not dancing into every corner of my body like it did in chemo recovery. This is waaaay more manageable. So, major huzzah! *gently raises arms a few inches in celebration*
I even started and finished an entire book in the last two days. I know, who am I?! Thank you to those of you that recommended Cultish by Amanda Montell a few weeks back, it was excellent! You already know I’m fascinated by all things cults, so this was a real treat. She dives into the way cultish groups wield and manipulate language to attract, persuade, and trap those that are seeking something outside of themselves. She mentions it’s not always “dumb” people that find themselves in cultish groups, but people who are seeking something. Connection, purpose, money, change, community, etc. And these language tactics are present in a wide spectrum of groups from religious groups like Heaven’s Gate to Soulcycle diehards to Christian MLMs to the woo woo self proclaimed spiritual healers filling your IG feed with some spritely bullshit about how the quantum field will readjust your self imagined framework and prefixed patriarchal ideologies. And we like to think we’re smarter or more clever than someone who would find themselves in a vulnerable position within one of these groups, but the lure of belonging can sneak up on a person. Even the concept of creating a patreon hub could spiral into a cultish category if not managed appropriately (we try to manage appropriately!).
I think the way we find ourselves both more connected and disconnected than ever creates a unique susceptibility to cultish enterprises. Desire for improved relationships, to others, our bodies, our finances, our God, overrides our instincts about the integrity of the institution/person facilitating those relationships. Of course, it immediately makes you scan through your own life and see if you’ve accidentally associated yourself with any of these endeavors. And I guess the closest I come is inadvertently participating in the early “cult” of Youtube. Depending on whether you view it that way. And that’s where my fascination runs rampant. When, if at all, does a creator/audience relationship cross over into a cultish community? I’m not entirely sure, but wild to think about. And that’s what I did all day yesterday. 🙃
Anyway it was an incredibly interesting read on the way we consciously and unconsciously find ourselves experiencing fanaticism. And Amanda has such a way with words (because she’s a language scholar!) that explains it so much better than I can. Definitely recommend if you need something to read over the holidays.
Speaking of holidays, Christmas is Monday!? I loved Mamrie’s post about Christmas breakfast. It was delicious on multiple levels. And funny because Chinese food was/is my mom’s go-to holiday meal for the fam and it never disappointed. Elliott was just wondering the other day if we should look into getting a honey baked ham for us for the holiday. And that’s about as far as we got with that idea. But that seems like a fun activity to get into over the weekend, what should our Christmas feast consist of? O0ooo0oooOOOoo0o! Thanks for the inspo, Mames! Elliott and I haven’t made many holiday traditions over the years since our holidays are usually spent huffing ourselves through an exhausting (and sweet) east coast tour de family. But this year we get to do whatever we want! Time to have some fun! Cut to us eating Chinese food and watching Home Alone.
Speaking of movie watching, we got tickets to see Wonka this afternoon so I'm gonna go get ready. I haven't left the house since Tuesday so it's about time ol Elliott takes his singular swollen left lump lady out for some fresh air! Honestly, I'm not even super interested in seeing this movie, I'm just looking forward to the snacks. I hope you all enjoy your holiday weekends as best you can. It's a wild weekend for all kinds of feelings so sending out lots of support. And thanks, as always, for being here (on this nice patreon that is not a cult!) 💚G
Comments
John Paulsen
Oh, by the way, in this Saturday’s Times or Post they have an article about “Remarkably Bright Creatures “ and Shelby Van Pelt.
John Paulsen
The topic of parasocial relationships is fascinating. Might be a great idea to find a social/psychological book examining the phenomena for Bar Flies. I don’t have any suggestions, but with your recent course work and graduate degree, maybe we can find one. Just a thought. So glad you’re upbeat, positive and doing well.
I love that you say "breast" and not any other term 🤣 so professional of you.
John Paulsen
In regards to cults; I agree that the most salient observation is that it’s about belonging. With social media saturating everything, we developed parasocial relationships on line. Much like those in the Bar Flies book group, we develop a very concrete relationship mediated electronically. As an older, 75, retired Superior Court bench officer , I find it fascinating. Oh, and by the way, Grace your are kicking ass and I love it. Kudos to you (oh, and Marie as well ).
