Omnixius
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Read this in full or it will frighten you.
🕑 Added 2021-04-12 22:11:08 +0000 UTCHello readers, I have been struggling to find a way to write this that didn't sound like the world was collapsing. So let me start this way. I am currently fine, in fact I feel better than I have felt in nearly a week. This is due to a bevy of pain killers that my doctor finally gave me a prescription for.
The short story is I have been in slowly increasing pain that reached mind numbing three days ago. My neck has swollen up at the base of the shoulder blade. This has caused two major problems. One, I can' t use my right arm well, and holding that arm in the writing position for longer than five minutes becomes unbearable.
Now unfortunately I don't have medical insurance. The story would take a long time to tell but suffice to say, I rolled the dice and cancelled it as I have NEVER once in my life needed it. A month later the wife was in the hospital on deaths door. This caused a cascade of financial problems for me, and lead to my writing these stories. They were an outlet for my pain and loneliness.
As we struggled through the mess that became our life money became even tighter. I made the gamble that lightning would never strike twice and didn't renew my healthcare, and now I desperately need it.
My neck swelled along the base over a month ago, but it was just a noticeable bump, and over the next few days it subsided. Over the next month it started a pattern of reoccuring with each new flare up being larger and more painful than the previous one. I broke down and went to a doctor and paid out of pocket and she wanted a lot of tests done. Cat scan. ultrasound, blood work, maybe even a biopsy. The problem of course is nobody wants to pay for it. As I like to work six to seven days a week for eight to twelve hours a day I have manged to work myself out of the free coverage range.
I have spent the last two weeks spending most of my writing time on the phone with hospital financial counselors trying to find some way to cover me. In the meantime the problem as only grown. The last couple of days have seen it swell so badly it is causing headaches, earaches, and searing pain in my shoulder. I can't effectively use my right arm anymore and the only comfortable position is flat on my back with a hot water bottle on the swollen area.
I nearly went to the emergency room today after my second sleepless night. My doctor finally broke down and gave me a prescription for something that took away the pain, and I found a hospital that is willing to give me an emergency medical scholarship and pay for the testing and treatment.
Now, I am writing this because wow those pain meds WORK! Oh I feel so much better. I also wanted to explain why I have been struggling to meet deadlines and keep up.
My doctor has sent in all the requests for the tests and I am waiting for the hospital to call and tell me when. Then we will finally have some idea of what I am dying off.
Now, I am told there is a very good chance this is one of two things. A simple boil in a very painful and awkward place. It would appear getting them on your neck, especially along the shoulder blade is common. And they cause the kind of pain and swelling we are seeing. It can also be a cyst on either my lymph nodes, or thyroid gland. Both if which are easy to take care of.
less likely but still on the table is this is an injury. I had a ladder collapse underneath me dropping me about twenty five feet to land on the ladder itself. The fist swelling appeared roughly three days after the incident so it is possible this is some kind of residual injury.
However, they have prepared me for the possibility that it is Thyroid cancer, and if so it is likely I am already too far gone. Now, this is the last and most unlikely option because my doctor has pointed out that it subsides and cools off which a cancer wouldn't do. I also lack other symptoms I should be demonstrating by now. Of course all of the above conditions should have other symptoms that I am not demonstrating.
Anyway, I wanted to communicate my issue. I have hinted at a medical problem in several posts but not elaborated on it because I honestly didn't know enough to talk about it.
In the next few days the tests will be done and I will finally know more. But until then my writing will be heavily interrupted. It is also possible and very likely I will spend some time in the hospital.
I believe this to be nothing more than an inconvenience made more complicated because of my financial problems. I have such good news to tell you in relation to those, but that will wait for another post. In short, I will get chapters up when and where I can, but no longer be on a schedule. Right now I am focused on writing the battle of Calathen now that I can finally work pain free for more than a few minutes.
This of course was frustrating me. This is a climactic moment of the last six books and I was writing it in bits and pieces as the pain kept driving away. This is not the time to write a fragmented broken chapter, it is the time to shine and show true glory. I will do my best under the circumstances and be open to rewriting it if I miss the mark.
Thank you for reading this. Sorry for the news.
Comments
Focus on your health, and write when you can. Type with your other hand if possible. If it is injury or strain related it might be a good idea to rest the connected limb when you can. Be careful with the pain meds, they can be very easily become habitual. You don't want to go down that road if you can help it. I would like you to write, but its better to have less now for more in the future. Take care of yourself first. You have my support no matter what. If your financial stuff is taking a toll, consider setting up a donation system/page. It might not save the world for you, but if it can help a little it might be worth it. Best wishes from Norway.
Thank you. Honestly I think this is either an injury or the boil. Both of those would explain why it keeps fading away and coming back. I have just let it get out of hand because of the medical insurance thing, but that hurdle is over now. Soon things should be back to normal. I swear I could write a story about my life and it would read like a tragedy. Still I have so many things to be thankful for, and I have learned that some of the best things in my life came out of these moments. who knows what wonderful thing will be born from this moment of struggle.
Sam4005
I dont have a lot to say but, take the time you need and take care of yourself, i trust youll write a good story, whatever the time needed for.
