Omnixius
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🕑 Added 2022-09-16 01:32:27 +0000 UTCAyawa paced irritably as Lilly looked on in surprise. She didn't understand why the woman was so upset about Thayle's egg, which made Ayawa angrier. Again, it went back to her belief that humans and dragons shouldn't mix because it was a path to a second destruction. They had met in a clearing on a nearby hill outside the camp where Ayawa had a small fire going, already smoking with the sweet plant.
“Ayawa, you are being unfair,” Lilly insisted. “Gersius and Thayle are human. They only had an egg because of the binding. It's sharing a soul with us that is causing the change.”
“Humans don't lay eggs,” Ayawa countered. “We have to face the fact that they are more dragon than human now.”
“So?” Lilly asked innocently. “Isn’t that a good thing?”
Ayawa went to say something but bit back her words before Lilly could hear them. It made Lilly angry that Ayawa still felt this way, even after all the time she spent teaching her. The woman had a kind heart and was happy for Gersius to finally marry, but she still couldn't put her prejudices aside. She was terrified that men mixing with dragons was a sign that the world was about to fall again, and this time there would be no coming back.
“I don’t understand why you feel this way,” Lilly insisted. “Balisha and the other divines support it.”
“They supported it the last time as well,” Ayawa said. “And look what happened.”
“That was because Solesta went insane over it,” Lilly corrected. “She isn’t here to cause a problem this time.”
“And yet dragons are once again divided and killing one another in her name,” Ayawa pointed out.
Lilly had no defense for that remark and had to admit that Solesta's curse reached beyond her destruction to cause a second dragon war. However, this one was nothing like the first, probably because so few dragons remained after that terrible war. It was another reminder to Lilly that she had to find a way to free the dragons, no matter what the cost. She decided to change the subject and ask why she was opposed to Sarah teaching Tavis control over the flames. This only made things worse as Ayawa withdrew, telling Lilly that it was none of her business. Lilly tried to reason with her, pointing out that she was here to teach, so why not let Sarah?
“Because you have no idea what it has cost him,” Ayawa snapped and looked around to make sure no one was near enough to hear.
“Nobody will hear us,” Lilly insisted as she folded her arms. “Tell me what it cost him.”
Ayawa paused to take a deep breath and seemed to calm as she struggled to center herself. She looked to the sky that was beginning to streak with the reds of sunset.
“He was a different man when I met him,” Ayawa began. “He was running from something that haunted his dreams so badly he tried to drown it out with women and wine. How we met isn't important, but he and I quickly grew close. I eventually asked him why he was so haunted, and he confided in me what he had done. His power was hard to control, and he had lost that control where it cost him everything.” She paused to collect her thoughts and then continued with her story. A younger Tavis had gone to visit his sister and her family, including two young children. A group of Mingfe's people attacked him in the village where they lived. They hunt the fire weavers and kill them where ever they are found. Tavis was forced to use his power to defend himself, but he was badly outnumbered.”
“So, how did he survive?” Lilly asked as Ayawa looked down.
“He pushed his power too far and lost control,” Ayawa replied with a voice that dripped with pain. “His marks saved him before he burned, but not before he turned everything around him to ash. His sister and her family died to his flames, and he still hears their screams in his dreams.”
“Oh,” Lilly said in surprise. She couldn't imagine how bad she would feel if she accidentally killed one of her family. Ayawa admitted that she couldn't appreciate his pain until she witnessed him do it again. Her people were chasing them, and they were tired from running. They had sheltered in a barn for a rainy night and thought they were safe. However, her people managed to track them and cornered them inside. In the ensuing battle, Ayawa was dragged out, while Tavis tried to fight without resorting to his power. He went mad when it became clear they were going to kill him and take Ayawa back. Ayawa witnessed from a safe distance what happens when Tavis loses control as the barn exploded in a ball of fire, and he stepped out. She described a man standing in a ball of flames that got larger and larger with every stop. He cackled with a form of madness as he set his gaze on her and began to walk her way. The fire consumed everything in his path, even the arrows her people desperately tried to kill him with. Ayawa managed to kick herself free and run as Tavis burned the remaining four tribespeople to ash, killing their horses in the process. Unfortunately, in his madness, he also set fire to the main house, nearly killing everyone inside before the ash mark finally brought an end to the display.
“Then what happened?” Lily asked, fully engaged in the story.
“He screamed in intense pain as all that heat was condensed into the mark, branding him like a hot iron,” Ayawa said. “I have never seen anything so horrific in my life as to witness people and animals burned alive. What's worse is he remembers it all vividly afterward, and those screams come to him some nights.”
“You don't think he should learn control?” Lilly pressed.
“I think he should give up the fire altogether,” Ayawa insisted. “It has brought him nothing but painful memories and haunted dreams. Besides, that night he used the last of his marks. If he loses control again, it will be for the last time.”
“So, it's alright for me to teach you because it comes with no inherent risk, but Sarah must know how to teach Tavis without him being at risk,” Lilly pleaded.
“I said no!” Ayawa shouted. “I want to leave all that behind us and go on with our lives. He will be better off without it. That night I made him promise me he would never call on the flame again. He has done his best to honor that pledge, but sometimes he has no choice.”
Lilly didn't want to push her anymore, so she decided to change the subject. She asked if Ayawa had been practicing the inner focus technique. Ayawa claimed she had but didn't know what she was supposed to see. There was no shape or form in the light, fog, or anything in between. Thus there was nothing to focus on and pull at. Lilly was sure that there had to be something if her people really could change forms. They practiced again with Lilly closing her eyes and describing what she saw by starting the transformation but not completing it.
For over an hour, Ayawa practiced as Lilly enjoyed the scent of that smoke. When the stars were bright, she called an end to the session and reminded her to try the dream tonight. Lilly returned to the camp and her loved ones, taking a moment to check on the egg before retiring to their private space. Once alone, she made love to Thayle, then Sarah, and finally Gersius, satiating her hunger for their affection.
Sarah stayed awake and went out to watch over the camp while Thayle and Gersius slept. Lilly closed her eyes and focused on the hall in the temple of Eastgate, trying her hardest to slip into the dream. She used the slow breathing technique, listening to each breath as it slowed while seeing the little room she made love to Gersius in.
She blinked and looked around to see she was in the room. She had managed to enter the dream intentionally for the second time, and her excitement caused it to blur. She quickly got control of herself and walked to the door, throwing it open to the familiar hall outside. The tables were there this time, and they were set with fruit and little cakes. Lilly remembered how the priestesses would bring them food daily and how often she ate just because it was there.
She walked to the railing and held her hand out to the rays of sunlight that filtered down through the canyon. If not for this natural crack, they would never have been able to escape. She looked at herself to see she was wearing the old farmer's dress, but oddly she was barefoot. The shoes had never fit, but why wasn't she wearing the lovely boots Gersius had bought her?
“Lilly?” came Ayawa's voice, and Lilly turned excitedly to see the woman standing in the hall in her animal skins.
“You did it!” Lilly cried. “We are in the dream!”
“This is the dream?” Ayawa questioned and looked around as her form started to fade.
“Ayawa!” Lilly called and ran to grab hold of her. Instead, her hand passed through the woman like she was an illusion, so Lilly called out, begging her to focus.
“Lilly, I can’t see you anymore,” Ayawa replied, her voice sounding like an echo from a great distance. She took a few steps as her hair and outfit changed, her mind constantly flitting from idea to idea.
“Ayawa, you have to focus on one thought,” Lilly insisted, but it was too late. The woman faded from sight and was gone leaving Lilly alone in the dream. She was frustrated that Ayawa was unable to hold the connection, but at least they had briefly made the link. Her moment of disquiet ended quickly when she decided to exercise her control. She hadn't walked intentionally in the dream alone before, and Sarah wasn't here to maintain her. She closed her eyes and focused on another place, opening them to look upon her egg. She knelt before the egg, running a hand over the surface while marveling that it existed here.
“I can’t wait for you to meet your sibling,” Lilly whispered. “I know you will miss me, but always remember that I love you.” She laid her head on the egg and let her tears fall as her heart ached. She lingered for a long moment trying to bond with the egg but eventually parted to walk through the cave. She knew this space well because she had made it, taking a small cave and carving it into a much larger one. This was always going to feel like it was her home, but something new stirred inside. She walked to the lip and stood beside the waterfall to look over the valley.
“This is my home now,” she said, referring to the entire valley. “Gersius will build our house, and we will finally be at peace.” She focused her thoughts, and in a blink, she was on the ground, walking across a carpet of green grass and wildflowers. The stream veered off to her left and went around a low hill vanishing from sight until Lilly crested the top. She wavered for a moment as she couldn't believe she was here alone. That nearly pulled her out, but with a renewed focus that she accepted this as real, it all solidified again.
Over the hills she went, walking to the place where the house should be. She wondered if she would ever see it built or would her time end long before then. As she crested the next hill, Lilly paused in wonder to see the house was there, but not the same. The shape was a little off, and the stone wall in the front garden was missing. The windows were not in the same places, and the roof was too low, but it was here for some reason.
She hurried down the hill and ran for the door, throwing it wide to see if Sarah and the others were inside. She called out as she searched the kitchen and backyard, but nothing stirred. She noted that the rooms were not exactly right, with altered or missing furniture or out-of-place things. Lilly found it all fascinating and wandered into the back hall, pausing for only a moment when she heard weeping.
Lilly crept down the hall that separated their bedrooms, drawing closer to the sound. She finally arrived at a shut door and listened from the outside. This was Rose's room, and inside, somebody was crying. Lilly lifted the handle with a nervous hand and slowly opened the door. She leaned to the side to peer through the crack and saw something she never dreamed could be.
Rose sat on the bed with her face in her hands, crying like a little girl. Lilly was stunned to see her and jumped back from the door, unable to figure out what to do. She wished they had come here with Sarah now so that the two could talk, but Rose was free now and under no compulsion to listen.
Lilly didn't know the right thing to do in this situation, so she carefully closed the door and took a deep breath. Then, with a nervous hand, she knocked on the door and heard the crying stop, followed by a broken voice demanding to know who was there.
“It's me, Lilly,” she replied from the hall. “I didn't mean to intrude on you. I came to visit my egg and saw the house, so I investigated. I will go away and leave you alone if you wish, but if you want somebody to talk to.”
“What did you do to me?” Rose asked. “Why do I hurt inside?”
Lilly cupped a hand over her mouth as she remembered speaking those very words to Thayle on an empty road long ago. She tried to think of what to say next, but she wasn't as good at this as Thayle was.
“Maybe you should ask your mother that,” Lilly suggested.
“No!” Rose shouted. “I don’t want to see her.”
“Are you sure?” Lilly pressed. “We can meet here whenever you want to spend some time at the house.”
“I said no!” Rose shouted, so Lilly let the matter drop.
“Rose, I am not as good at explaining this as Thayle or Gersius is, but I can tell you what they told me when I asked the same question,” Lilly said as she leaned against the wall to remember that day. “I told Thayle that I didn't understand and that I was hurting inside. She told me that feeling was a pain associated with love. I just didn't understand how to manage it because I had never been able to feel it before.”
“This suffering is love?” Rose called.
“No,” Lilly said as she grew frustrated. “Love feels a bunch of different ways. Sometimes it fills you with a happiness you can’t imagine until you experience it. But love always comes with pain, and the pain is very common when you first start feeling it.”
“I don't want to feel it,” Rose shouted, and Lilly heard her feet on the floor. The door burst open, and Rose went right up to Lilly's face. “Why did you do this to me?”
Lilly saw the broken expression and red eyes of a woman who had been crying for hours. She did the only thing she could think to do and wrapped Rose in a hug and held on tightly.
“I did it because I love you,” Lilly whispered. “And you are starting to feel the love in return.”
“NO!” Rose insisted and pulled out of her arms. “You must take this away from me.”
Lilly didn't know how to tell her she couldn't. This was a pain she would have to grow to understand. Lilly tried to explain how she had no control over Rose's feelings but was honest about a final point.
“Rose, you have been given a rare touch of freedom, but I don’t think it will last,” Lilly insisted.
“What do you mean it won’t last?” Rose demanded.
“I mean, you are not shielded by Balisha anymore. Sooner or later, the curse will drive this from you, and you will stop feeling it,” Lilly explained.
“Good,” Rose spat. “Because this is a terrible thing.”
“No,” Lilly said softly and held out a hand to touch her but thought better when she recoiled. “Rose, I said the same thing. It hurts in a way we dragons can't understand, but if you endure it long enough, you grow and become something better. I know this will be hard to believe but if you persevere with this, one day you will look back on this moment as a blessing.”
The look on Rose’s face told Lilly that she didn’t believe a word of it. Lilly didn’t know what to say or do to help the tormented dragon with her pain. Thayle had always been at Lilly’s side when the pains came, guiding her back to the light. Now that Lilly thought about it, those pains had come while she was unbound like Rose was. Was being unbound when the cracks started to form the reason it hurt so much?
“What do I do?” Rose demanded.
“I wish you would talk to your mother,” Lilly pleaded and saw the anger cloud the woman's face. “But if not her, maybe you could talk to Thayle. She knew exactly how to help me through my pain. She took care of me when it was too much to bear.”
“I don’t need the rodent’s advice,” Rose hissed.
“Now, you wait just a minute,” Lilly insisted as she grew angry. “I just told you that Thayle knew how to help me when I was in the same place you are now. You need to understand that Thayle is trained in dealing with matters of the heart and love. Ulustrah blesses her with an insight into the kind of pain you're feeling now. If anyone will be able to help you, she will, and I know she would if I asked her.”
“Fine, bring her here,” Rose relented. “I will let her try.”
Lilly felt excited that Rose was willing to talk but then remembered she didn’t exactly know how to control the dream. How was she supposed to find Thayle and bring her here?
“What are you waiting for?” Rose asked.
“I….” Lilly started, then sighed. “I don't know how.”
“What do you mean you don’t know how?” Rose growled.
“I mean, I don't know how!” Lilly shouted. “My mother tried to teach me, but I never practiced or learned how to do it.”
“But you dragged me about like you had a rope around my neck,” Rose countered.
“I had Sarah to anchor me here,” Lilly replied. “She did all the work of making the dream stable. I just let my heart lead me, and things happened. I don't truly understand how or why.”
“You don’t know how to use the dream?” Rose asked. “Then how are you here now?”
“I am practicing doing it by myself,” Lilly said. “This is one of my longest intentional dream walks.”
“You honestly don’t have the skill to dream walk?” Rose said as she started to smile. “I am surprised you haven’t had it beaten into your head by now. My mother made us practice it constantly. She insisted we know how to exercise all the things she called the rights of our blood. I was so sick of her constant demands that I was glad when I finally left. She once refused to let me eat a meal until I demonstrated my control of weave.”
Lilly found it funny to hear Rose say such things about Sarah and wished her mother had been diligent in teaching Lilly these things. Lilly knew a little of the weave and everything else but lacked any true discipline. Sarah had obviously expended a great deal more effort in teaching her brood, even if Rose was angry at her for it.
“I think your mother did the right thing,” Lilly said. “I wish my mother had spent more time teaching me. I didn’t even know our history or that a war had been fought in the past.”
“What did your mother teach you then?” Rose asked in surprise.
“She taught me about humans,” Lilly replied with a shrug. “She taught me to read and write in their language, and even the blend of old draconic and human.”
“Your mother taught you how to write in human?” Rose asked.
“She read me some of their books,” Lilly added. “But she always told me to stay away from them. She said never to eat their animals or fly where they could see me. She said if I made humans aware of my presence, they would come in great numbers to slay me.”
“Well, at least she was wise enough to warn you about that,” Rose agreed.
“She tried to teach me the other things, but I never listened,” Lilly protested. “I didn't grow up in a temple where I was shielded from the curse. My mind was always on food and gold and how to get more of both. You had the advantage of a clear mind open to learning and understanding.”
“It isn’t a curse!” Rose spat.
“Yes, it is!” Lilly shouted back. “Look at what we just said. You have a much better understanding because you were free to learn. I was under Solesta's influence, and I don't even know how to enter the dream properly. That so-called blessing is turning us into wild animals, and dragons will forget the dream even exists in a few generations.”
“That will never happen,” Rose countered. “I taught it to my brood.”
“Did they learn it like you did? Or did they learn it like I did?” Lilly demanded.
Rose looked stunned for a moment then a look of horror crossed her face. She turned away from Lilly and walked a few steps down the hall, shaking her head.
“No, my brood did not wish to learn,” Rose admitted and looked down. “They probably have less ability than you.”
“Tell me again that Solesta’s dying words are protecting us,” Lilly insisted. “Tell me how we dragons will be blessed when we have forgotten the rights of our blood and probably even our language.”
“Enough!” Rose shouted and turned back. “I am sick of this argument. Things will be better when the order is restored.”
“You can’t possibly believe that,” Lilly countered.
“I do, and I will no longer talk about it!” Rose shouted and vanished from the dream along with the house she had created.
Lilly turned to see the valley, green and empty as it should have been. She looked back to the spot Rose had been standing in a moment ago and began to smile. If Rose had come back here, that meant she had a strong emotional connection to the place. In some way, they had reached her, and her mind was plagued with doubts. Out of desperation, she had come back here, to where it all began to figure it out.
Lilly closed her eyes and woke in bed, still nestled to the warm chest of her husband. Thayle was at her back with an arm around her waist. She was snugly pressed between them, sharing a quiet form of love. She absent-mindedly ran a finger over one of Gersius's many scars while peeking at his dream. Her eyes widened as she saw him standing on a hill with a child on either side. One was a girl with long blue hair and the other a boy with scruffy dark hair. Gersius was telling them about the divines and how they had protected them. She was about to break the connection when she heard a voice call out, and Sarah entered the scene carrying a baby in her arms. Lilly couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl, but the child had a thin frock of red hair.
Lilly jerked away, unable to believe what she had seen. Three children and no mention of Lilly being away. She began to wonder if Sarah's vow to protect her might come true. Could her fanatic love for Lilly undo that which was fated? Lilly started to tear up as she began to believe that she had been wrong about the previous dreams. Maybe she would be there to see her daughter and all their other children grow up. Maybe the future had changed and a new path set.
She lay her head back on his chest as tears of happiness wet her eyes. She looked forward to telling them about Rose and the dream about their children. With a soft hum, she closed her eyes and nestled her cheek into his shoulder. She could feel Sarah in the bind, flying high over the camp, keeping watch through the night. She swelled with happiness for the night's events, and she blissfully fell asleep for the first time in many days. This time the dream was just a dream, and Lilly stood beside Sarah, smiling at the baby in her arms.
Comments
Sam4005
She should accept that travis need control for day he shall need to use his fire. The only other solution is to give up everything and hide in a cave. Ty for chapy
Posting early because I might not be home tomorrow until very late. This chapter was a surprise even to me. I knew Lilly and Rose were going to meet again but I had planned it another way. As I worked out what to do here, I saw an opportunity, and jumped on it.
