simonegiertz
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My friend Mohammad
🕑 Added 2023-06-05 17:34:49 +0000 UTCWant to see one of the most embarrassing photos ever taken of me? Buckle up your eyeballs and cue the self-deprecating drum roll.
The competition is tough, but no, it's not this one:
Or any of these:
Or any freeze frame from when I was in that Chinese sitcom.
The photo that I'm more embarrassed about than all the ones above, is this one:
Why? Let me tell you the backstory.
Six Swedish students painting a door in Nairobi - the backstory
It's 2008 and I have just finished a year as an exchange student in China. I'm fresh off the airplane, sitting on my bed in my childhood home, trying to process what my parents had just told me. While I was out traveling, they had gotten a divorce*, and our house was up for sale. They hadn't wanted to tell me, because they were worried that it would ruin my year in China.
Like a giant piece of shit clogging a toilet, the news completely obstructed my tear ducts. So I sat there, dry-eyed and disoriented, in what was about to be my former bedroom. And I made a plan: I was going to move to Kenya. I didn't want to be home for the divorce, and there was a Swedish boarding school in Nairobi open for enrollment.
*The divorce was a really good decision! They're both so much happier now and both have amazing new partners. I'm actually heading to my dad's wedding in Italy this weekend, and my mom is getting married this autumn.
Fast forward through awkward boarding school life, constant sunburns, falling in and out of love with every classmate, learning Kiswahili, and then one day loading up in a chartered bus to "go help build a rural school."
For two hours, thirty Swedish students took hundreds of photos while moving dirt around in wheelbarrow and painting doors and window frames. When we had finished helping, we went back to our walled boarding school campus, and jumped in the pool to cool off.
It's a small, lived example of something that I see a lot of on YouTube today. It's everything from filming giving unsheltered people sandwiches, to family vloggers making exploitative content about their adopted children. Or say, six Swedish students painting a school door in Nairobi. It's being helpful purely for content, and it begs to ask who is actually helping whom.
All of this is to say that I've avoided making any type of content where I'm positioned as "helping" someone in a vulnerable position, and whenever I've been approached by charities to collaborate, I've almost always said no. As much as I want to wield my internet powers for good, I'm terrified of perpetuating harmful narratives and of portraying myself as the hero in somebody else's story.
(Moreover, I think charities often help uphold the very systems that make the people they help vulnerable in the first place, and it can be more of a cul-de-sac than a path to significantly changing systems and lives. I'm more of a fan of work focused on recognizing the interdependence of people and building power rather than polishing up the short end of the stick, but that's a story for a different day.)
Ok, time to climb down from my high horse, standing on a soapbox, on a hill I'm not sure that I want to die on. Enter Mohammad.
A couple of weeks ago I got an email from the UNHCR, telling me about a Syrian carpenter who lives in a refugee camp in Jordan. His name is Mohammad, and he has spent the last couple of years building toys for all the kids who live there.
Did I maybe want to go there and build something with him? I said yes. The premise just felt so different from all the other things I had gotten pitched. It wasn't one person helping the other, or being a tourist in the pain of somebody else's life. Just a meeting between two people with similar interests and very different stories.
So I packed my bag and flew to Jordan, and spent 30 sweaty minutes in an interrogation room trying to explain why I was trying to bring so many weird contraptions into the country.
The body position of "dear border patrol agent, I promise my intentions are pure"
One of the things I brought was this sign that I made as a gift for Mohammad. It says "Mohammad's toy shop" in Arabic.
I can't tell you much about the shoot, but what I can say is that meeting Mohammad was absolutely nothing like I expected it to be. I laughed, I cried, I was angry, I was happy, I couldn't wait to leave and I was so sad when I did.
Mohammad referred to me as his daughter at the end of our time together, which would have been more special if he didn't have 28 children already. But I have so much genuine love and respect for that stubborn old man. I'm so grateful that I got to meet him, and I'm working on ways to keep being in his life even after leaving Jordan.
The video will be out on June 20th, for World Refugee Day. Can't wait for you to meet my new friend.
XOXO
Simone
Comments
Annabel Blake
Simone! I wasn't sure where else to type this but I've just watched your last video- it's stunning, and I'm so glad you made it. I've been a Patreon sub for....I think maybe ~4 years? You bought a book of mine I made [Diary of an astronaut] and whey hey I've been through the troughs of physical product manufacturing/marketing- keep sharing, keep it up, love your work ❤️
Josh is HockingTheShop
I just signed up because of your most recent YouTube video. I love being able to support artists I love directly. I was shocked to find out I wasn't already a patron! Keep on doing what you're doing!
Kian Ryan
Yes. This. Perfect. Thank you. Look forward to the video.
Jim S
Fascinating and really well-written post -- can't wait for the video -- thanks!
RedFlames
Dearest Simone, are you one of those curious people who think it's called a "wheel barrel" or is that just a little typo that snuck in? It's called a wheelbarrow and I'm always amazed when people think it's a "barrel" 😯 ...Oh and this not-painting-a-door in Jordan sounds really cool :)
Jason H
I see people that "help" others, where the real intention is only to make themselves feel more important, as if to show the world "Hey, look at what I did!" The people that usually need the help don't want to be a charity case, but they accept because they are really in desperate need. I grew up before everyone had a camera in their pocket, and social media didn't really exist. If you show someone compassion and empathy, it was because it felt like the right thing to do. It's one of the main reasons I was a volunteer on our Fire and EMS dept. You don't get paid, you don't get famous, and no one takes usually takes pictures. You do it because people need help, and you're in a position to do that.
Clair High
I can't wait to hear more about him.
Dom
We'll add this to the list of reasons why I deeply admire you, and look forward I suspect to adding Mohammad to the prestigious "people I admire" list
Luca Cavaletto
The premise of this video sounds amazing! Can't wait to see it, and thanks for reminding me of the Chinese sitcom, I still need to do the yearly rewatch of that video. Sorry not sorry.
Paul Counts
Poking fun of yourself *and* substantial self-awareness? Would you adopt me?
Stephen Hager
It seems like there's a fine line to tread between being virtuous and being exploitative in the social media age. I think the best antidote is establishing a genuine connection with the person you're helping. It sounds like you did just that. I'm looking forward to seeing the collaboration!
Simone Giertz
It's just tricky because the line is so blurry between helping and fake helping. And me abstaining from being helpful because "it's not in the right way" also just feels wrong.
Guy Mason
It shows strength to stand up to fake helping that hurts more than helps in the end. Good job!
ERIC JENKINS
I guess that makes Mohammad and I brothers. I adopted you the first time I saw a Simone video. Thanks.
Adam Wishneusky
You get it ❤️
Taylor Pridgen
I understand how the image of doing good can get in the way of the good. And it's all to prevalent today. But ultimately your intention is always good, and I have no doubt that your intention has driven you to help people in less obvious ways. Almost like a kindness vigilante.
