dupe
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fresh meat, page 89
🕑 Added 2021-02-19 02:02:16 +0000 UTCEDIT: no extra panels i guess, i'm getting hit with a wicked headache today.
this page is a little longer than usual to avoid an awkward cut... i will have to jostle the panels a lot to center them once the page is fully colored and flattened.
rough one to comment on, because i feel like a lot of comments are simply spoilers at this point. i don't exactly try to aim for shocking endings anymore or keep people guessing, but i suppose it feels like the principle of not spoiling it. i don't feel this was my strongest scene, but i don't feel it was my weakest, either. the weakest points to me are the emotional consistency of the characters -- they make sense to me, but i feel they could have been rendered cleaner with a "second draft" phase, like most of the comic.
this scene was initially going to have a couple more panels at the end, showing a more definitive, private reaction from kim indicating that a large portion of the session was intentional in some way, and that she was cautiously confident with how the session went, albeit a bit confused.
instead, the biggest indicators that not everything kim said in this session were not entirely barefaced were fink pointing out some contradictions (in my head, i feel like it's easy for him to write these off as bpd splitting), but, more pressingly, the fact that she visibly cares about what he is writing down and his reaction (or lack thereof) to what she says despite the fact that she said it doesn't matter.
the last 2 panels are a throwback to the last shot of the first evaluation, but it's flipped, and she leaves with fink instead of staying behind as he leaves.
fink inquires about a reason to live instead of probing for rationalization for death because suicide risk usually considers not only a desire to die, but a lack of will to live. a moderate will to die can be less concerning to a professional if a high will to live is present as well.
i had kim mention her dad instead of her mom first because i feel like he is more of an asshole, and he would probably come to mind first. additionally, if she had mentioned her mom first, it would probably read more to the viewer that her mom is the main perpetrator of misery in kim's life because she was the one who picked up the phone earlier in the comic.
whether she actually genuinely believes she wanted a break and feels the poor home life is a part of why she is miserable or just said that as part of a bit is really up in the air. i do feel it was more solidly ambiguous with the last couple of panels that got cut. who knows, maybe i will find the willpower to add those last panels tomorrow.
