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13) Stay far away from these 3 types of people.
🕑 Added 2022-12-30 16:11:49 +0000 UTCYou’re not just the average of the FIVE people you surround yourself with.
It’s way BIGGER than that.
You’re the average of all the people who SURROUND YOU.
So take a look around and make sure you’re in the RIGHT surroundings.
Most people know about typical DANGEROUS people, narcissists, and so on.
But there are dangerous traits much more COMMON.
These traits are in people, yet they THEMSELVES don't even know.
After you read this you will be AWAKEN.
Your self-awareness will INCREASE and you will notice these traits in MANY people.
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#1- Miserable People
This is not just a SAD person as most people think.
They are not sad about themselves it's the sadness about OTHER people.
*MISERABLE definition:
(of a person) wretchedly unhappy or uncomfortable.
You may think it's easy to tell, but usually, it's HIDDEN.
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When someone is HAPPY, a highly miserable person will point out all that could possibly go WRONG in great detail.
They may smile and laugh on the surface, but their insides are FILLED with unresolved insecurities which cause them IRRITATION.
Miserable people won’t OUTRIGHT say they are ENVIOUS of other people’s successes.
What they WILL do, however, is,
put DOWN other people’s achievements and successes by pointing out the NEGATIVES or DOWNPLAYING the news so the other person’s excitement is immediately DEFLATED.
In other words, dampen your confidence.
They tend to never want other people to have the SHINE if they are in the same room.
If someone achieved something, they will be the first to UNDERMINE and say:
- "I could've done that."
- "Why are you so happy?, That's not a big deal."
- "You could've done better."
Instead of seeing the GOOD in people.
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They also always expect the WORST.
They believe Life sucks and all the BAD stuff happens to them, which is the mantra of a miserable person.
And it is not a PHASE they are going through!
That’s just how they have been for years and are making no attempt on working on that aspect of themselves.
They are chronically UNHAPPY, CAN'T and REFUSES to feel joy, and HATES it when others are content.
Always COMPLAINING and getting angry at PETTY things causing them to take out their frustration on others.
I know a 74-year-old man who has been like this, apparently his whole life.
Neither his wife nor daughters enjoy being around him.
What then happens is, he feels incredibly LONELY and tries to take up your space and deplete you of your happiness.
It's best to have BOUNDARIES with people like this.
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#2 - Entitled people
These types of people feel as if they are ENTITLED to your life.
What does that mean?
*ENTITLED definition:
believing oneself to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment.
It is as if you OWE them something.
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These are the people who can't take NO for an answer.
This may be because they are OLDER than you or anything that puts them in a position where they feel SUPERIOR.
Or have been brought up by their parents to be "the chosen one", causing them to act like they are higher than everyone else.
Entitled people are those who didn’t hear the word “no” enough as children.
It is almost IMPOSSIBLE to COMPROMISE with these people.
Whether it’s deciding simple things like where to eat or making life-changing choices, they tend to find a way to have it their way.
Often times ARGUING with everything you say.
They set EXPECTATIONS for other people and expect their personal needs to come BEFORE everyone else's needs.
They EXPECT everyone to be behind their back and call and tend to act AGGRESSIVELY when they don’t.
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There is a DIFFERENCE between feeling entitled and your self-worth.
SELF-WORTH is about respecting yourself and not letting no others INVALIDATE or dismiss you out of hand.
ENTITLEMENT is the feeling that you can do whatever you want without repercussions, and that people owe you certain things without you doing anything to earn or deserve them.
It's also about ignoring other people's boundaries and only thinking about what THEY can do for YOU.
Don't MISTAKE the two.
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3# People who play the victim.
They BLAME everyone else refusing to take any RESPONSIBILITY.
If you go to them for a PROBLEM that they caused, they end up DODGING it by playing the victim.
They do this to make YOU feel GUILTY.
There are reasons why they always play the VICTIM:
- To avoid taking responsibility
- To get your sympathy
- To get attention from others
- To win an argument
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Victims believe that they are at the MERCY of everyone and everything around them.
They ARGUE when you try to tell them the TRUTH and REJECT any reasonable advice you're offering.
They are UNABLE to be in the wrong.
Even if you call them out for something SMALL, they’ll TWIST it.
For example:
- “You told me the wrong date so I was not able to arrive on time” (proven with chat logs) “No! We never talked about that and you just communicated wrong”
Subconsciously believing they are always PERFECT.
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The victim has trouble choosing their battles.
To them, every battle is a war.
They feel as they are UNDER ATTACK all the time and have a HARD time realising that not everything is about them.
Ironically, when there is a chance that they could be caught in an ERROR, they suddenly become PERFECT.
They FAIL to see that they have an issue with literally everyone they come across but yet still think they are NEVER in the wrong.
People who play the victim are loud and INTENSE sharers.
Their stories are LENGTHY and overly EMOTIONAL and purposely tailored to grab the attention and heartstrings of the person they are talking to.
They seem to have a lot of conflicts and are ACTUALLY happy even when getting attention.
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The crucial point is NOT to cut these people off and cause a scene.
Don't even call them out on it.
NEVER show your cards.
It is for you to be AWARE of the defaults in that person and stay away from it IMPACTING you.
It is not also about ANALYSING every person and labeling them.
But if you notice these people in your life you CAN NOT let it impact you.
Remember:
You’re the average of all the people who SURROUND YOU.
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Here's what YOU can do:
*Limit interactions as much as possible while still remaining in touch.
*During interactions, remain mindful that, "I didn't cause it", "I can't control it" and "I can't cure it".
*When they share something negative about their situation, I may say something like, "That's too bad for you" and move the conversation in another direction.
*Ask them open-ended questions to change the negative topic "What are you looking forward to this month?" "What did you like best about....?" etc.
*After interactions, remind yourself of those three Truths ("I didn't cause it" "I can't control it" and "I can't cure it") and make sure not to create resentments that you carry away with you.
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At the end of the day, life teaches you that everyone is responsible for themselves!
And despite other people’s behaviours and choices, YOU are responsible for protecting YOURSELF, your peace, health, energy, and life force.
YOU need to look out for, preserve, and protect, yourself, from certain kinds of people.
Not everyone is worthy of and deserves YOUR energy, space, and time.
Especially, people who abuse YOU, or YOUR space!
@ionicXBT
Comments
During my all life, 2 persons told me that. 1st my parents, 2nd ionic... you are like our father m8 !
Happy people create their own inner worlds. This is key. Thank you all for your valuable comments.
