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16) First step to changing your life.
🕑 Added 2023-01-18 20:13:24 +0000 UTCYes you CAN change.
Stop thinking, “I was born this way,” or worse: “It’s just the way it is.”
Your personality and life are FLUID.
YOU can change.
But it WON'T happen on its own.
Let go of who you are so YOU can become who you might be.
“Most people have two lives: the lives we live and the lives we are CAPABLE of living.”
Change always takes TIME, a few months of DEDICATION can change who you are and how you live.
Why not do something right PROPERLY for the first time in your life?
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Start with a *Life Audit*
To change your life, you first need to get clear on what your life looks like RIGHT NOW.
This will help you find out what EXACTLY you NEED to and WANT to change.
Look at the different areas of your life and determine which of those you’re (un)satisfied with:
- Health (mental & physical)
- Finances & Wealth
- Career
- Relationships (friends, family & romantic)
- Personal Fulfillment/Growth/Creativity/Spirituality
Expand these areas depending on what feels important to you, but this distinction is a great place to start.
Now, rate each of these areas on a scale of 1–5 with total HONESTY.
1= I’m unsatisfied. (This area needs change.)
5= I’m completely satisfied. (There’s nothing I want to change about this area of my life.)
Based on this rating, create a plan on how to move FORWARD with SOLUTIONS by asking yourself these questions:
- Do I need new skills to improve the poorly rated areas of my life?
- Which resources/support do I need to make those improvements?
- How can I get started?
- What’s one tiny change I can make immediately?
- Which daily shifts do I need to make in order to create lasting change?
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The NEXT step is creating a big-picture VISON of your future.
This is CRUCIAL because it’ll hold you ACCOUNTABLE by reminding you of the life you want to CREATE for yourself.
Instead of setting specific goals, you ask yourself how you want to FEEL:
- What kind of person do I want to be?
- How do I want to feel (emotionally and physically) when I get up each morning?
- How do I want to feel shortly before falling asleep?
- How do I want to spend the majority of my time?
- How do I want to make big decisions in my life? Based on fear and scarcity or based on abundance and joy?
- What are some experiences I want to make in the next 3, 5, or 10 years?
No matter WHAT you want to achieve, the starting point is always a picture in your mind.
IF YOU CAN SEE IT IN YOUR MIND THEN YOU ARE MORE THAN CAPABLE OF HAVING IT IN PERSON.
You do not bake a cake or draw art without having a clear image of it in your mind.
Don't only answer these questions in your head but INSTEAD create a VISION BOARD full of images that represent your IDEAL LIFE.
Your vision board isn’t driven by numbers or specific metrics.
Instead, it’s about your LONG TERM DREAMS and the broad overview of the life you want to CREATE for yourself.
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Now, bring it TOGETHER.
Combine your LIFE AUDIT and your VISION to develop a maximum of 3–5 GOALS you want to work on for the next 3 months.
These goals will help you IMPROVE the areas of your life you’ve determined as most UNSATISDYING in the first step of the process.
Those goals should be:
- specific
- achievable
- and a little challenging so you really need to stay focused
Don't overwhelm yourself with huge goals, FOCUS on starting small and staying consistent.
“Changes that seem SMALL and unimportant at first will COMPOUND into remarkable results if you’re willing to STICK with them for years.”
Set TWO DIFFERENT different types of goals:
Result goals are final results you want to create. E.g. losing 20 pounds.
Habit goals are about building habits that’ll ultimately help you feel a certain way or implement specific changes in your life. E.g., by working out daily, you might feel stronger and more confident.
Most result goals are ACHIEVED through habit goals.
E.g. to lose 20 pounds, you want to stick to a healthy diet, work out regularly, etc.
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Make sure you actually *DO* what you say you’ll do.
Imagine where you would be or who you would be right now, if you did the things you said you would do?
Now the question is: How can you ensure to make time for your habits/goals?
Ideally, you’ll have a specific answer to that question and define EXACTLY how you’ll stick to your good intentions.
- Will you do it first thing in the morning?
- How will you prepare and stay consistent?
- Do you want to work with an accountability partner?
- Do you need a coach or trainer to support you? (I am here to help)
- Do you need any other external resources like courses, books, etc.?
Keep in mind that only YOU are in the DRIVER'S seat of YOUR life.
It’s YOUR responsibility to make sure you actually show up for yourself and DO what you said you’ll do.
Consistency is the unsexiest yet surest way to move forward with anything in life.
So many people have IDEAS and GOALS but lack actionable plans and discipline.
IDEAS and GOALS goals won’t lead you anywhere.
They might motivate you for a few days, but that’s it.
After a while, motivation will fade away, and you’ll face the same OLD problems. (Check out post 3)
“You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do.”
Less talking and more ACTION. Let the success talk for you.
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You need to fix your MIND before you can fix your life.
You’ve heard this HUNDREDS of times, the problem is, it REALLY does.
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing — that’s why we recommend it DAILY.”
You must be determined, focused, and inspired.
If you lack the INSPIRATION to get started, you’ll likely GIVE UP before you can see your DESIRED results.
- How will you ensure you stay INSPIRED to actually make a change?
- What will you do if you DON'T feel inspired?
- How will you ensure you *STILL* keep going?
Whenever you “don’t feel like doing the work,” remind yourself that everything in life is a TRADE-OFF.
Your daily choices dictate the life you lead.
Every single day, you decide whether you stick to your good intentions or not. If you do, you move a step FORWARD. If not, you stay stuck, or worse: you move BACKWARD.
Every day, you choose whether you show up with integrity, courage, OR if you let the outside world dictate how you feel.
Now you’re aware of this basic principle, sacrificing your goals might suddenly feel much more PAINFUL.
THATS HOW IT SHOULD FEEL.
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The truth is changing your life is about CONSISTENCY and not about perfection.
You might make MISTAKES and slip off your routines.
That’s fine, as long as you stick to a simple rule: NEVER MISS TWICE.
Skipping your habits once is a MISTAKE that can happen to anyone.
Skipping it TWICE in a row, however, can quickly become a PATTERN.
Skipping your intentions more than once is usually based on LAZINESS and a lack of commitment.
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Now you might ask yourself… “Well, how can I make sure I ACTUALLY stick to my good intentions?!”
The answer is, by designing your ENVIRONMENT for success. This has two fundamental goals:
- DISCOURAGING bad behavior by getting RID of negative influences.
- ENCOURAGING positive behavior by making it as CONVENIENT as possible to *do* what you said you’d do.
So the next questions are:
- How can you design your home (and/or office) to help you do the things you say you’ll do? (E.g., prepare your workout clothes in the evening, so it’s the first thing you see in the morning.)
- Do you need to make any purchases?
- Do you need to get rid of anything?
- What kind of external support do you need? & How can you get it?
- What about the people you’re surrounded by? Will they help you on your journey to change, or will they stand in your way?
Remember YOU are the center of your process, but your environment and the people you’re surrounded by matter too.
So it’s your JOB to ensure the things and people you’re surrounded by actually HELP you design the life you DESIRE.
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Last but not least.
Even though changing your life is based on a SIMPLE framework:
- You evaluate the your current status to find out what EXACTLY you want to change.
- You gain clarity about the future.
- You come up with small daily action steps that’ll help you move towards your bigger picture vision.
- And you follow your plan day after day.
# Next I will share with you some actionable steps which can help you to live a better life.
You MUST also remind yourself to ENJOY THE PROCESS.
Reward yourself for your WINS and celebrate your milestones.
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In the end, life isn’t about the final destination but about how we EXPERIENCE each day while working on something even better.
Keep in mind that nobody really cares about YOU or your problems and that YOU'RE the only one responsible for the life YOU live.
Don’t believe in anyone being perfect. We all make mistakes.
The best time to START is now.
Do the HARD things, so you can become more experienced and STRONGER.
AND cheers to us on becoming BETTER than before.
@ionicXBT
Comments
thanks. it's hard to improve our behaviour to be a better person in all aspects of the life, but at the end, the satisfaction pays out !
The best thing about you… your intention doesn’t appear to be: make people rich, but instead to improve people on the way to helping them reach their dreams and financial freedom. Everything you say feels in opposition to the way the rest of the world is trending. Truly a breath of fresh air. One that is desperately needed.
