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Matabar. Book II. Prologue + Chapter 1 - The Marshals

🕑 Added 2025-07-13 21:04:30 +0000 UTC
Matabar. Book II. Prologue + Chapter 1 - The Marshals

Comments

Javek Redhand

To be honest I felt the prose and style was a bit lacking and less evocative in comparison to your previous chapters. For example this excerpt from your previous chapter is a great example of your beautiful and well crafted style — “The wind swept over him, headier than any whiskey, as if carrying a stolen glimpse of tomorrow on its back. It tangled in his hair, beckoning him forward, whispering of secrets he’d long forgotten.” The story telling, tension, and engagement is still top notch. However, there were also some minor English errors (there versus their) that did not occur previously. That said, keep doing the things that brought you success previously, and if it takes a bit longer, then so be it.

Frank Steele

It was great, I had no idea English wasn't your primary language


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