Eddie Wilder
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The Black Belt Affair Ch. 17
🕑 Added 2025-08-18 13:00:10 +0000 UTCAshley woke fully to the sensation of the mattress shifting as Jacob sat up beside her. For a moment, Ashley kept her eyes closed, feigning sleep, delaying the inevitable confrontation. But the weight of his gaze was palpable, and she knew delaying it was futile.
She opened her eyes to find him studying her, his expression guarded in a way that made her heart constrict.
“When did you come home?” he asked, his voice carefully neutral despite the hurt lurking beneath the surface.
Ashley pushed herself up against the headboard, wrapping her arms around her knees in an unconsciously defensive posture. “Late. Or early, I guess. Around three.”
“Where were you all night?” Jacob’s tone was still measured, still holding back the accusations she deserved.
The lie she’d rehearsed in the car came to her lips automatically. “Driving, mostly.” She couldn’t quite meet his eyes. “I needed to clear my head after... after our fight. I ended up at the beach for a while, just watching the waves.”
Jacob was silent, processing this. Ashley risked a glance at his face and found him studying her with an intensity that made her wonder if he could somehow see through her, could detect the traces of Carlos on her skin, in her body.
“You could have called,” he said finally. “I was worried. I kept thinking something might have happened to you.”
The genuine concern in his voice, the care despite his obvious hurt, pierced Ashley’s defenses. A sudden wave of real emotion, not the calculated remorse she’d planned to display, but genuine, overwhelming guilt, swept through her. Tears sprang to her eyes, unexpected in their intensity.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, the words catching in her throat. “I’m so sorry, Jacob.”
He watched her warily, clearly trying to gauge the sincerity of her emotion. “For not calling? Or for something else?”
The question contained layers of meaning, an opening for confession, for honesty, for clearing the air between them. Ashley felt the weight of that possibility, the chance to come clean, to try to salvage what remained of their trust.
But the truth would destroy him, would end everything instantly. She couldn’t bring herself to do it, couldn’t bear to see the look on his face if he knew the full extent of her betrayal.
“For everything,” she managed, tears flowing freely now. “For being distant. For taking you for granted. For not appreciating what we have.” All true, if woefully incomplete. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately. I feel like I’m sabotaging us, and I don’t understand why.”
Jacob’s expression softened fractionally, the wariness in his eyes giving way to a cautious hope. “I just want to understand what’s happening, Ash. One day we’re fine, the next it’s like you’re a million miles away. And then last night...” He shook his head, the hurt resurfacing. “I’ve never seen that side of you before.”
“It wasn’t you,” Ashley said, reaching for his hand, relief flooding her when he didn’t pull away. “I was angry at myself, and I took it out on you. That’s not fair, and it’s not the kind of partner I want to be.”
“What are you angry at yourself for?” Jacob’s question was gentle, his thumb absently stroking the back of her hand in a gesture of comfort that made her guilt spike painfully.
Ashley stared at their joined hands, struggling to find an answer that contained enough truth to be believable without revealing too much. “I think... I think I’m scared of how ordinary our life has become,” she admitted quietly. “And then I feel guilty for wanting more when what we have is so good.”
It was perhaps the most honest thing she’d said, and the relief of speaking even this partial truth was immense.
“Is that why you’ve been so caught up in jiu-jitsu?” Jacob asked, an edge of insecurity creeping into his voice. “Because it’s exciting? Different?”
“Partly,” Ashley acknowledged. “It makes me feel alive in a way I hadn’t in a while. But it’s not...” She hesitated, choosing her words carefully. “It’s not a replacement for us. For what we have.”
Jacob was quiet for a long moment, considering her words, her tears, the vulnerability she was displaying. Ashley held her breath, waiting for his response, for the verdict on whether her misdirection had been enough, whether he would accept this version of her remorse.
“I just miss you,” he said finally, his own eyes growing damp. “Even when you’re right here with me. I miss how we used to be.”
The simple admission, the naked honesty of it, broke something open in Ashley’s chest. Fresh tears spilled down her cheeks, but these weren’t calculated or defensive, they were genuine grief for what she’d done to their marriage, for the trust she’d violated, for the love she’d taken for granted.
“I miss us too,” she whispered, and meant it with every fiber of her being. In that moment, the fog of desire and destructive impulse cleared, and she saw with painful clarity what she stood to lose. “I want to find our way back.”
Jacob pulled her into his arms then, his forgiveness more devastating than any accusation could have been. Ashley buried her face against his chest, breathing in the familiar scent of him, letting herself be held by the man she’d betrayed only hours earlier.
“We can fix this,” Jacob murmured against her hair, his arms tightening around her. “Whatever’s going on, we can work through it. Together.”
“Yes,” Ashley agreed, clinging to him, to the hope he offered, to the possibility of redemption. “Together.”
They stayed that way for a long time, holding each other as the weight between them lightened incrementally with each passing minute. When Jacob finally pulled back, his eyes were clear, the hurt not gone but overshadowed by determination.
“Let’s take the day,” he suggested. “Just be together. No gym, no work, no distractions. Like we used to.”
The proposal, so simple, so healing in its intention, made Ashley’s chest ache with longing for the uncomplicated happiness they’d once shared. “I’d like that,” she said softly.
They started with breakfast, moving around the kitchen in a dance perfected over years of shared mornings. Jacob made coffee while Ashley mixed pancake batter, their bodies finding familiar rhythms in the space. They ate on the balcony, watching the ocean in the distance, talking about small things. A movie Jacob wanted to see, a new recipe Ashley had been meaning to try, the neighbor’s noisy dog.
Ordinary conversation, unremarkable in its content but profound in its normalcy, in its suggestion that they could find their way back to each other. Ashley felt herself relaxing into it, the constant tension of her double life temporarily easing as she inhabited this single, honest version of herself. Jacob’s wife, enjoying a quiet morning with her husband.
After breakfast, they walked along the beach, hands linked, the physical connection a reminder of their re-commitment. The cool sand beneath their feet, the vast horizon stretching in front of them. It felt cleansing, restorative.
They spent the afternoon cooking together, making Jacob’s favorite pasta sauce from scratch, the kitchen filling with the rich aroma of garlic and herbs. Ashley opened a bottle of wine, and they sipped from the same glass as they worked, passing it back and forth in a gesture of intimacy that felt both familiar and newly significant.
As dusk fell, they settled on the couch, the remains of their meal cleared away, a comfortable silence enveloping them. Jacob’s arm draped around her shoulders. The simple touch, affectionate rather than demanding, made Ashley acutely aware of the difference between what she had with him and what she’d been pursuing with Carlos.
Jacob’s love was steady, patient, a slow-burning flame that warmed rather than consumed. Carlos offered intensity, novelty, the sharp edge of desire that left marks on her body and soul. In this moment of clarity, Ashley understood that she’d mistaken Jacob’s gentleness for blandness, had failed to appreciate the depth and strength of his quieter passion.
When he kissed her, tentatively at first, she responded with genuine desire, wanting to reclaim the connection they’d lost, to rediscover the man she’d married and the woman she’d been before temptation had led her astray.
Their lovemaking that night was tender, purposeful, each touch an act of re-commitment. Jacob undressed her slowly, his eyes never leaving hers as he laid her on their bed. Ashley surrendered to his gentleness, allowing herself to be present in this moment, with this man, without the intrusive memories of another’s hands on her skin.
When Jacob entered her, the physical connection mirrored the emotional one they were rebuilding, careful but deliberate, acknowledging past hurt but moving forward with hopeful determination. Ashley wrapped her legs around his waist, drawing him deeper, her hands cradling his face as they moved together.
“I love you,” Jacob whispered against her lips.
“I love you too,” Ashley replied, the truth of it resonating in her chest even as guilt twisted beneath it. She did love him, had never stopped loving him despite her betrayal. That was perhaps the most incomprehensible part of what she’d done.
Their pace quickened, bodies finding the familiar rhythm that had always worked for them. Ashley felt her pleasure building, unhurried but inevitable, like a tide rising to meet the shore. When she came, it wasn’t the shattering, violent release she experienced with Carlos, but something deeper, more complete, a wave that carried her forward rather than dragging her under.
Jacob followed soon after, his face pressed against her neck. They lay entwined afterward, neither rushing to separate, the physical connection maintaining the emotional one they’d been rebuilding throughout the day.
Later, as Jacob slept beside her, his breathing deep and even, Ashley stared at the ceiling, a strange peace settling over her despite the complexity of her situation. Today had reminded her of what she stood to lose, of the foundation she’d been systematically undermining with her choices. In the quiet dark, she made a silent vow. She would end things with Carlos, would recommit fully to her marriage, would find a way to be satisfied with the life she’d built with Jacob.
The resolve felt solid, unshakeable in the aftermath of their re-connection. Ashley turned toward Jacob, curling against his sleeping form.
Comments
Earl0849
I noticed that Carlos and Bob are very similar in how they pursue and subdue women. They overwhelm them with attention and kindness. Now that Carlos has assumed control he has started with the verbal abuse of Ashley and Jacob. His goal to break her down causing her to lose respect for Jacob. Sorry Hannah no love here coming from Carlos. Having said that I have to wonder if Bob will show the same tendency toward Jess and Tom? Gain control of Jess and then mount verbal attack of Tom causing Jess to lose respect for Tom and join Bob in the attack.
Casserole
Agreed with her solution being concerning. Even though she's trying and telling herself she'll stop, she's not willing to deal with the possible consequences of revealing her affair to Jacob.
Hannah Baird
Perfectly split down the middle between Ashley's further descent, and Jacob not being completely undercut. The reconnection aspect, something may happen on a tertiary level, most likely be sustainable. It depends really. But this was such a fascinating chapter. Short yes, but it's doing a lot of lifting to pull Ashley back to another direction, and build back some goodwill. It's showcasing more of her autonomy. BUT! It's also, concerning her POV, this ends as a mantra. She's partially trying to motivate/convince herself: "She would end things with Carlos, would recommit fully to her marriage, would find a way to be satisfied with the life she’d built with Jacob." It reminds me of someone who is an addict, trying to hop back on the wagon. Tragic.
