Mel Marie ASMR
patreon
double feature friday this week :)
🕑 Added 2022-10-18 23:11:20 +0000 UTChiya loves ♡
i've come down with something (i think it's just a cold, i'm very careful) so i'll be posting 2 patreon vids this friday night to give myself a few more days to recover. unless you want blowing nose and sneezing asmr. lol.
also, i know it's not a terribly sexy subject, but i've been wanting to share something. i haven't been managing my mental health well these days. as in, the tenuous balance i was maintaining pre-move got absolutely demolished post-move. the good news is that therapy is a lot more accessible in my new state so I have begun the intake process. :) i think it will help me deal with some of the negative memories that got kicked up in the move.
even if y'all haven't noticed (although i'm sure some of u very observant people have), i know that it's affecting my ability to make content. i'm having trouble staying coherent on camera, i'm not sticking to my YT video schedule, i have been horrendous about answering my DMs (i'm very sorry, my anxiety is overwhelming me), i haven't used my twitter acct in months, etc. it kind of feels like a lie in a way, because i'm posting my content like usual and the version of me that's on screen is smiling but IRL mel kind of looks like a zombie rn haha.
i just feel kind of...dull...lately. and there's no shame in admitting when you're struggling. it usually helps me a bit to acknowledge that things are hard, and quit pretending like i'm a robot :P i don't often talk about my personal mental health because 1) people online can be very cruel, 2) i see people with similar conditions as me being fetishized and that makes me feel weird 3) i'm not ready to be that vulnerable. but i struggle with my mental health daily and it's okay if you do, too. ♡
i think a lot of us found ASMR because we had been through hardships or felt very sad emotions, so i believe that my patrons will understand my meanings here and why i wanted to share with y'all :) if i can help myself to a better place mentally, i can do a better job for all of you. so don't worry , i'll keep fighting ~
i will see you on friday!!! whew, i do feel a little better getting all that off my chest :,) be back soon. love love love you.
mel
Comments
TieBackTheToes
Nothing more important than taking care of yourself. Sorry to hear you’re not doing so hot, glad to hear you’re doing what you need to pick yourself back up! I recently sent you a DM, no need to respond! Hate to think that it was causing you anxiety. Thanks for all you do!
Sleepy Wil
Oh Mel, take all the time you need! Thank you for the update and being so open and honest. Remember that you have so much support here. Glad to hear you’ve been able to get some self-care in, and I hope you can rest that cold off soon! Kick its butt the same way you kick our insomnia with your amazing ASMR videos ^_^
