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Chapter 815
🕑 Added 2022-06-23 22:46:49 +0000 UTChttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1RboCwcOHoS435zakeoO2N67gKN_KLZOJoZ8Qzwrrsi0/edit?usp=sharing
Today was a day for the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, and the jarring shifts between weal and woe left this Sovereign exhausted in body, mind, and spirit.
The grievous blow to his confidence and foundation both would set him back by years at the least, but his ability to adhere to the Razor’s Edge throughout the ordeal was something to take pride it. In his darkest hour, he persevered and found his way out from under Falling Rain’s shared burden of despair and depression, an accomplishment which brought this Sovereign hope aplenty for the future regarding his recovery, but it was difficult to find any joy or satisfaction with ultimate victory so far away.
The lingering effects of Falling Rain’s Orated attack, one which made it difficult to hold this Sovereign’s head up high, especially in light of this latest reversal of fortunes.
Unable to believe what he’d just witnessed with his own two eyes, he stood stunned in silent lack of comprehension as he went over the memory of events which ran contrary to almost everything he once believed true. Driven to the brink of desperation, the boy tapped into his innermost misery to use against this Sovereign. A most effective weapon which dealt a ruinous blow to his confidence and determination, but the boy’s despair was a double-edged sword and would be his unmaking. Though this Sovereign might well require decades to repair the damage done to his psyche, the boy drank too deeply of his own misery and all but threw himself off the Razor’s Edge. A moment was all it would take, a single instance of surrender and abandon in which Falling Rain succumbed to despair, and the Spectres would take root in his body, mind, and soul.
In order to minimize the effect of the boy’s ability to Devour and Cleanse Spectres with impunity, this Sovereign had long since restrained what Spectres he could, but there were limits to his abilities and nothing could be done regarding those clever enough to remain outside of his reach. Swarms of those malevolent spirits emerged from the deepest, darkest recesses of the Void, drawn here by the scent of the boy’s vulnerable state like sharks tracking a trail of blood from thousands of kilometres away. To mortal ears, their arrival was silent as the grave, but oh how they howled as they manifested in reality, covering the skies and sands in a cacophony of fervent contempt and honeyed lies urging their prey to give in. Hardly necessary in this Sovereign’s eyes, for the boy’s misery was so complete he could hardly imagine a pit any deeper, a chain more binding, or a weight more ponderous than that which he only just experienced through Oration.
The boy would surrender, of this there could be no doubt, or at least so this Sovereign wholeheartedly believed right up until the swarm of Spectres were swallowed whole by the boy’s Domain, consumed in an instant without warning or hesitation. One moment, the air was so thick with itinerant souls that their very presence darkened the world, sapping the colour and vibrance right out of reality as they readied to violate natural Law. Then the next moment, they were gone, Devoured so quickly it was as if they never existed in the first place, mere figments of this Sovereign’s imagination that disappeared in the blink of an eye. This was a marked departure from the boy’s previous accomplishments, because while he was capable of Devouring Spectres with remarkable haste, it was never so immediate and without delay. There was always a transitionary period, a drawing of energy from one plane to the next, like a man drinking whilst submersed in water, yet this was akin to instant annihilation of matter, with the Spectres present in one moment and gone in the next without even the ability to struggle.
Then the boy sighed again and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, “Good dog.” Lifting his head, Falling Rain proceeded to offer a sheepish smile while meeting this Sovereign’s eyes and requesting he end his own life for the sake of… convenience.
A surge of fear and fury both almost unmade him as his once-subdued Spectres bucked and heaved against their restraints, chains of unyielding Will and steely determination which had come loose in the wake of the boy’s Orated attack. Within the landscape of his mind and Natal Palace, a throng of Spectres broke free and set forth to ravage his soul, but he held firm to the Razor’s Edge and used logic and fortitude to bind them once more. To think, an off-hand comment could shake this Sovereign’s foundation so easily, the damage was far more pervasive than he initially thought, a realization which only served to further fuel this Sovereign’s rage and destabilization. With proper focus and attention, this fresh inner conflict would be settled in a matter of seconds, yet this Sovereign could not afford any distraction, so he stood firm and held his tongue as he did battle with the demons of his heart while keeping close eye on his foe.
Thankfully, the boy said nothing as he slowly sat up, with his rabbit still cradled in his single, unbroken arm no less, an impressive feat not solely due to the nature of his injuries, but also the considerable weight of depression dragging him down. Troubled though the boy’s mind and heart might be, none of it showed in his demeanour, so neutral and unflappable despite the tumultuous exchange which just took place. His expression appeared calm at first glance, but further study revealed it as a distant, glassy-eyed expression that belied the unspeakable pain and incomparable misery he surely must feel. A look which belonged more on a man suffering from mild fatigue or mindless boredom, one entirely out of place on this battered child who only just demanded this Sovereign’s death whilst embroiled in a bitter battle where neither one of them held the upper hand. There Falling Rain sat beneath the hot desert sun, drinking in his surroundings as if seeing them for the first time, yet this Sovereign suspected that the boy saw nothing at all and had instead retreated inwards to the Void.
Where he no doubt could see this Sovereign’s struggle, if he knew well enough what to look for. Difficult to say really, for there were times when Falling Rain’s actions made others suspect he held all of Heaven’s secrets in hand, and others when he blundered about and made mistakes even a child would know to avoid. Take this very moment for example, because this Sovereign was at a loss on how to explain it, for the logic seemed circular at best. Did Falling Rain withdraw to the Void because he sensed this Sovereign’s inner struggle? How else would he know he was safe here to lower his defenses in reality? Yet how would he know he was safe without first lowering those defenses to check on this Sovereign’s plight in the Void? Yet there was no hesitation from the boy at all, his body left helpless as a newborn babe while sitting a hundred metres away from his foe, a distance this Sovereign could cross in an instant if he were not embroiled in bitter battle with his teetering emotional state of mind.
The sheer audacity set this Sovereign’s blood to boiling in reverse, and this burst of emotion set him back in his battle against the Spectres by a fair margin. His inner struggle rose to heights never before seen as the boy set to tending his injuries, wounds of body, mind, and soul which this Sovereign had paid dearly to inflict. Broken bones shifted about the boy’s shattered flesh, yet Falling Rain didn’t so much as grimace as he stared off into nothingness, his eyes turned towards this Sovereign’s general direction yet his mind somewhere else entirely. The corners of his lips quirked into a smile of all things, somehow amused by the agonizing sensation of regrown muscle and reconnected nerves, which he followed up by planting a kiss on his rabbit’s head, one that lasted long enough to discomfort this Sovereign even more than the boy’s ability to ignore physical pain. Nuzzling his pet close, he closed his eyes and sighed a third time, not in sorrow but with relief, as if this battle was already behind him and his victory all but assured, but nothing could be further from the truth. The Hare and Rabbit Divinities were still battling Gen and Goujian, though this Sovereign’s pawns had taken considerable damage in his distraction. As for other possible rescuers, there were none available, for the Old Wolf and his allies were all stuck in Shi Bei, working frantically to keep the Transcendent Divinities from bringing Heaven’s Wrath down upon them all. If that was the case, why would the boy be so at ease, so relaxed and relieved when the battle was not yet done?
The answer arrived almost unbidden in a moment of clarity, and this Sovereign finally put the pieces together as he unravelled the significance of the boy’s recent actions.
An emotion unexpressed would remain rooted in body, mind, and soul. A simple truth this Sovereign had uncovered so long ago, but one Falling Rain had only just discovered. All his life, this wretched child had gone through life burdened by the unfathomable weight of despair, a monumental mountain of emotion which he dragged along behind him. This was his pain and grief, his sorrow and anguish, his fear and hatred, all this and more which he kept close and hidden away for reasons unknown. Where others would have long since either succumbed to emotion or severed these burdens away, Falling Rain clung to his misery like a child clutches a favoured blanket, steeping himself in gloom and melancholy until he grew numb to it all. Why, only the boy could say, but after using those repressed emotions as a weapon and confronting them in full, the boy had finally found the strength to face his misery head on, and in doing so, had freed himself from the burdens he’d carried for so long.
Fortune found in disaster, Balance through Extreme Imbalance, and now this Sovereign might soon face Falling Rain at his strongest.
For three, long seconds, the boy sat in the sands with eyes closed and face pressed into his rabbit’s fur, and when he finally drew back for a deep breath, his limbs were whole and unbroken once again. His amber eyes focused and fixated upon this Sovereign, and though there was no confidence or arrogance to be found, there was conviction and determination aplenty. The boy did not know if he could win, but he set it as his goal regardless, and this Sovereign could almost respect him for his steadfast persistence if not for the fact that it enraged him so. Were he not already overwrought with emotion and unable to act, he would have smashed the boy into a meat paste before this mental transformation completed. Not just to satisfy this Sovereign’s rage, but also because he felt threatened by the boy’s terrifying potential, an admission which robbed him of courage and lent strength to the Spectres. The back-and-forth exchange played out within the landscape of this Sovereign’s mind and soul, with Spectres breaking free in his distraction even as he sought to bind others once more, for he could not afford to lose these Spectres and empower his foe even more. The boy had feasted on Spectres enough to Heal his body, mind, and soul in full, for his Elemental Spirit was capable of breaking down those itinerant shards of base emotion and Cleansing them into the very stuff of souls. Pristine and untainted Energy of the Heavens laced with the essence of life and existence both as well as the agency to enter the cycle of reincarnation, or at least, that’s what this Sovereign believed souls to be, insofar as his limited knowledge and perspective was capable of comprehending.
With this power in the palm of his hands, it came as no surprise when Falling Rain shot back to his feet, as hale and healthy as ever, but then he did the unthinkable and placed his rabbit aside. Not in the sand at his feet, but rather upon empty air at his side, and this Sovereign choked on his own spittle when the rabbit remained suspended where the boy left it. No, not suspended in air, but supported upon an invisible pane of Materialized Domain, where it sat back on its haunches and huffed in muted displeasure over the lack of physical comfort. Offering the aggrieved beast a conciliatory pat on the head, Falling Rain waved his hand and moved the pane of Materialized Domain and rabbit behind him before taking up sword and shield in hand, leaving his glaive poised between him and the rabbit as if ready to defend it to the death. “Alrighty then,” the boy declared, drawing out the words as he flourishing his weapons before advancing upon this Sovereign, moving neither quickly nor slowly but with deadly intent and indefatigable purpose. “Round Two,” he continued, his presence multiplying with every step as he drew upon the Energy of the Heavens to Materialize even more of his Domain and empower him in battle. “Fight!”
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Catharsis is one hell of a drug.
In JiangHu, I learned a lesson that I went on to overlook, because it hardly seemed all that important in light of everything else. I learned why people cry, and it’s to shed emotion, which was why I created a storm over the battlefield. I couldn’t cry, was too scared, too afraid, too unwilling to face my emotions, so instead, I gave them over to the storm clouds so that they could cry for me. A band-aid on a broken bone, that’s essentially what that was, and then I pretended like I was all better and didn’t hurt anymore. It worked too, for a time, but suppressed emotions always find their way back to the surface in one way or another, no matter how hard you might try to ignore them.
And boy, did I try. I blocked out my entire childhood to protect myself from my trauma, but even then, my little brother made his way back to front and centre of my mind. The Baledagh I pretended to be was not my actual brother, merely a manifestation created to help me manage in my time of need. Who better to save me than the little brother who looked out for me for the entirety of my childhood? The guilt I felt from taking ‘his’ body away, the persistent notion that I should give up this life for him, the forlorn hope of finding some way to share everything I had with him, it’s all more fucked up than I care to think about, but at least now it makes sense. Well, about as much sense as any multiple personality can, so I suppose it would be more accurate to say I understand why I’m so fucked in the head. My trust and abandonment issues, my inferiority complex, my extreme social anxiety, all of it can be traced back to my shitty childhood growing up in a Defiled tribe beyond the borders of the Empire.
What a relief.
It sounds weird to even think it, but knowing there’s a reason for all my damage is just the best news ever, because now, it’s not all my fault. I’m not broken because there’s something wrong with me, I’m broken because I never stood a chance from the start. No longer do I have to blame myself for everything, because now I can blame my parents instead, so fuck them and fuck the Heavens too for stacking the odds against me. Honestly, in light of everything I went through it’s a damned miracle I turned out even half as well-adjusted as I am.
A statement which would’ve left me in stitches just yesterday, but today, I know the truth, and the truth has set me free.
I am Rayne. I am Amigui. I am Falling Rain. These are my names, but I have many more. I was born Defiled, then sold as a slave, only to find my way back to the People who exiled my parents. From there, I was taken in and trained as a Warrior, dubbed a Hero, raised to Minister of Finance, and promoted to Legate of the Outer Provinces. I am a dutiful son of two adopted parents, spoiled brother of a doting sister, indulgent uncle to a niece and nephew, and hopeless husband who is head-over-heels in love with my four wives as well as a fifth woman who I hope to one day marry too. I am an adoring floof-father who aspires to add even more pets to his menagerie, an idealistic optimist who dreams of a better future, a pragmatist who accepts that a better tomorrow means more struggles today, a silly memester who wastes far too much time laughing at stupid jokes I remember from a past life, and a thoroughly damaged and broken young man who is understandably struggling with depression among many other things.
This is me in a nut-shell, the good and bad of it all, and though I have affirmed who I am time and time again, today, I finally have all the perspective I need to make sense of myself.
There’s one more detail I forgot to mention, and it’s an important one. I have a dog named Buddy, who is not only the best dog in the world, but also one who ate an Elemental Spirit and merged with it to become something… more. Blobby was always helpful in his own way, a spiritual tenant who paid rent by way of purifying the Spectres squatting within my body, mind, and soul and leaving usable Heavenly Energy behind, but now that he’s taken up residence with Buddy, Blobby seems more… sociable, I guess? I don’t know any other way to describe it. I admit I may have attributed more human characteristics to an amorphous droplet of Heavenly Water than I originally should have, but my dog seems to understand Blobby well enough, and even knows how to convey their shared thoughts through barks, emotions, and body language that form a message so complete that Buddy might as well be speaking plain English.
“Go fuck that motherfucker up,” my sweet doggy declares with a howl, albeit with language less foul for which I have no translation for, and I can only smile and wholeheartedly go along with his plan as I charge the motherfucker with sword and shield in hand.
The Energy of the Heavens stir around me in response to my Will, flowing through my Spiritual System in a new unique pattern I’ve not felt before, yet one that is familiar all the same. Why? Because I’ve channelled the Energy of the Heavens in this pattern more times than I can count, thousands upon thousands of times in fact, except I only lacked the ability to perceive it before today. Before this very moment in fact, when Buddy wordlessly passed along the notion of how it shouldfeel and showed me what to look for, enabling me to use the Spiritual Senses that I’ve known were present and accounted for, yet have never really been under my control. It’s so easy I’m surprised I even had to learn in the first place, as natural as pointing at an object or parsing a scent, an action so ingrained and instinctive I would struggle to even describe the process. This awareness does nothing to change the flow of Heavenly Energy, and yet this perception changes everything, for I can feel the minute changes and the energy building up as the flow gathers force and momentum. Not a physical force, but a metaphysical one, a charge building up in my body, and much like static electricity can set the hairs on my neck to tingling, I can feel the power growing from within.
This is not merely the power of Creation and Destruction both, not merely the result of harnessing the Energy of the Heavens. That’s part of it yes, but there’s so much more going on, so much changing and developing with each passing moment that I can barely keep track of it all. The Energy of the Heavens flows through me, but it also merges with me as well, and I become a part of it in an exchange given freely as I imbue this energy with the very essence of life itself and transform it into something… more.
I am the Sword. The Sword is me.
No meme is needed, no visualization required, for my Will alone is now enough. Peace erupts with Sword Force just as I execute Traverse the Horizon to close the distance and deliver a deadly thrust aimed at Zhen Shi’s throat. A side-step and bare-handed parry from my foe sets cold steel to singing as my blade misses by the barest of margins, but I am not yet finished. Following up the thrust with a slash, I seamlessly transition into Parting the Underbrush, a charging one-two combo that I named, “Sweeping the Fields.”
Or rather, I pretended Baledagh named it, because I thought it would be childish to give names to my attacks. Doesn’t matter anymore, because I fucking love it, and as an added bonus, the names make it easier to Visualize and execute.
This second time around, peace passes mere millimetres away from Zhen Shi’s skin, scything through his Domain Plated Defenses like so much empty air, a futile effort if there ever was one. Even his Runic Robes are unable to mitigate the destructive power of my Sword Force, parting before the edge of my blade like wheat before the scythe. The golden fabric mends the moment Peace is no longer in the way, but I know this is not without cost or effort. Knowing Zhen Shi prioritizes defense over offense, I keep up the offensive and pull out the third and final movement to this combination, Reverse Bite.
Spinning in place to strike with sword and shield both, this is an attack which I love to call, “Clearing the Heavens”.
As I give my body over to momentum and execute this backhanded strike, I can’t help but smile at Mama Bun as I pass her by. My heart soars at the sight of her seated upon her inflatable raft of Materialized Domain, one that is invisible to others but I can see as clear as day. The pint-sized flotation vessel moves as if possessed with a mind of its own, shifting out of Tranquility’s path before settling back down to where it was before, floating at chest height and poised to keep me between her and Zhen Shi. The sweet rabbit is pleased to have her raft back, but she’s frustrated because she can’t control it, so I send her my love and ask her to be patient before turning my attention back on the battle at hand.
All this happens within a fraction of a moment, an unconscious exchange which took no real focus on my part, or at least no more than it takes to register which direction is up and which is down. Tapping into my Spiritual Senses has done more than give me a whole new world of perceptions to analyze, but it’s also massively increased the amount of processing power at my disposal. My brain is still physically the same as before, soft and wet as ever, yet it feels like I’ve stuck on power-saving mode my whole life and only now figured out how to switch those settings off. Colours are brighter, my vision sharper, smells more pungent and distinct than ever, and despite getting distracted by Mama Bun’s adorable antics, I’ve been wholly focused and fixated on my opponent this entire time.
Even though I can’t physically see him, I already know where his head is, my Spiritual Senses guiding my arm to deliver a slash to where his throat will be even as he moves to avoid the coming blow. Odd as it might seem to use Sword Force with my shield, it’s not the sword which enables me to use Sword Force, but me. Turns out, Dad was right about Keystones being a crutch, because powerful as it might be to throw out memes left, right, and centre, it’s not as fast or effective as utilizing Sword Force with raw Will and Intent alone. In this instance, the Movement is so ingrained into my body and mind that the flow comes naturally and without effort, forming Sword Force in response to not only my directed Will, but my unconscious thoughts and intentions as well. With practice enough, I could probably deliver Sword Force with my fingers, and theoretically even with a sharp word or harsh snort, because once again, I am the Sword, and the Sword is me. For now though, attacks like that remain with the realm of future possibilities, but that doesn’t mean I can’t use Sword Force creatively. The fact that my weapons are lacking in physical length means nothing now that I’ve tapped into Sword Force and Sword Domain both. With a surge of Heavenly Energy and a little bit of Life Force, I affix two blades of Materialized Sword Domain to Peace and Tranquility both and stretch their respective ranges to almost a metre each. I could make them longer, but that would require more Heavenly Energy and Life Force to maintain the Manifested Domain in reality, and at this length, the expenditure is almost negligible and the benefits evident as Zhen Shi is forced to block an attack he thought he already dodged and give up the initiative once more.
That being said, I am still at a marked disadvantage in this battle, one which becomes apparent as I unleash a barrage of attacks and he defends himself without suffering so much as a scratch. Stalk the Dragon into Swipe the Rushes, Reverse the Flow into Fanged Clutch, Prancing Stride merged with Rising Steps, Darting Fang and Uplifts the Sequoia. It matters not how fast or clever or powerful my attacks might be, not if none of them connect, and Zhen Shi blocks, dodges, and parries my successive strikes with almost laughable ease. Not without reason of course, for my foe is the only person in history that has ascended to Divinity twice over, or at least the only one I know of who’s done it successfully. In contrast, I am but a mere mortal Warrior who has yet to wholly Shatter the Void, albeit one who has opened myself up to the Void in an analogous manner with the exception being that I can control it.
Because even though I know how to mitigate Heaven’s Wrath and keep myself from blowing shit up, the power of a false Divinity would change nothing here.
So though I wield power comparable to a Divinity, there needs to be a caveat tacked onto the end of that statement which reads, “Assuming said Divinity doesn’t lose his or her shit and go whole hog on my ass.” That being said, I am just as deadly as a regular Divinity, if not more so due to my Sword Force, but there’s a qualitative difference between myself and my opponent, one which cannot be quantified by numbers alone. Even then, the differences there are staggering to behold. Zhen Shi is both stronger and faster than I am, able to react to my moves and stay a step ahead despite fighting on the back foot, and I am experienced enough to tell that this is not a difference of skill, but rather natural ability and nothing else. Whether it be his strength, speed, stamina, durability, reflexes, or agility, Zhen Shi is more than a step above me. If not for Pong Pong blocking the worst of his attacks, I would’ve long since been crushed to a pulp, so it raises an interesting question as to why Zhen Shi has yet to counter a single time in this latest exchange. Maybe my Orated attack hit harder than I thought, or maybe he’s scared and testing the waters, or maybe it’s one of a thousand other reasons. Doesn’t matter why. All that matters is that he’s on the defensive, and I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
Because as fun and awesome as it is to cut loose and go on the offensive, I’m really just trying to buy time for Buddy to communicate what he’s picked up from Blobby and for me to figure out how to make use of this information.
Sweet though my dog may be, he is not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, as he keeps manifesting his leash and asking to go for a walk every time I ask for help. I’d love to bring him out so he can sniff the sand, but he doesn’t seem to understand that I’m a little busy at the moment and really need him to pass along Blobby’s words of wisdom. I gotta say, I can tell that he’s much better at communicating with Blobby than I ever was, because I keep getting hints that Buddy is trying to tell me what the Heavenly Tear wants, but he also really wants to go for a walk. Then again, the bar was never set all that high to begin with, so it’s hardly surprising Buddy understands Blobby more than I do. I mean, I thought the Heavenly Tear was trying to teach me to Hone Aura, when in fact he wanted me to use Sword Force, after which I suspect he decided I was too stupid to bother teaching and just gave up on trying. Thankfully, Buddy actually seems to sort of understand what Blobby is trying to convey, with the issue being my doggo doesn’t know how to break it down into something I would understand, and lacks the patience to keep trying when we could go for a walk instead. Turns out I’m the weak link in this chain of comprehension, which is a little embarrassing to say the least, but in my defense, this isn’t a matter of intelligence or wisdom, but rather one of Balance and Insight, because that is the only language Blobby understands.
Honestly? This is bullshit. Mark my words, I will science the shit out of Heavenly Energy one day, come hell or high water.
Between my stubborn insistence on a solution and continued rejection of his request for a walk, Buddy soon grows frustrated by our exchange and shakes his head about. Not to say no, but in pantomime of ripping some small animal apart, though I doubt he’s put so much thought into the response. Offering one last indignant huff, he holds his leash in his mouth and seats himself down in the Void before refusing to engage any more, because he wants to go walkies and he wants to go now.
Another huff, and now he won’t even look me in the eye, or at least is pretending he won’t while glancing back every half second to make sure I’m paying attention. He’s annoyed, but not because I won’t take him for a walk, but because I keep asking him for help and he…
Oh. Oh! I get what he wants now. Guess it’s time for walkies.
Retreating from my battle with Zhen Shi, I take a defensive stance and focus inwards and wholly open myself to the Void. There is no warmth or chill, no comforts or burdens, no rage or benevolence, coercion or nurturing. There are only the Heavens, vast and ineffable, and myself immersed within them, unwilling to struggle or surrender. The sea surges, the wind howls, the fire rages, and the earth endures, but this much is nothing to me, for I am the dam, the wall, the forge, and the drill, unyielding and unstoppable upon my Path which brings me every closer to the Dao. Emptiness within and emptiness without, I know that I can Shatter the Void and Ascend to False Divinity with little more than a thought, refine my mortal body, mind, and soul in the power of Creation and Destruction both, but as I stated before, this sort of empty power does not tempt me.
Today, I have a different goal in mind, one I will fulfill no matter the cost; I will take my doggy for a walkie, and no one, not even the Father Himself, will stop me.
The Energy of the Heavens surges through me and finds no urge or impulse to accomplish, but Buddy is ready and waiting to be swept away by the tide. The current brings him outside my Core, Natal Palace, and soul, only for him to open himself up to the Heavens and Shatter the Void in a manner similar to what I would have done, yet the results are nothing like what I would’ve expected. The power of Creation and Destruction are at his command, and I watch as he wields it with casual aplomb, his tail wagging a mile a minute as he focuses more on what is to come as opposed to the monumental and miraculous effort unfolding before my eyes. I’ve always thought of Buddy as a unique Natal Soul, one crafted from not just the memories of my dog from my previous life, but the indelible mark he left upon my soul. Buddy is not the same dog, nor is he the same soul, but even though he is technically a severed portion of my soul, there is nothing of myself within him.
The dog from my previous life had his own soul, but in his love and affection, he gave me a portion of his soul to hold and to keep. In my despair, I latched onto that portion of soul, the one part of me that loved me unconditionally and without limit, and gave it life once more because I needed Buddy in my life, the same way Ping Ping gave new life to Guai Guai using a portion of Guan Suo’s soul. They’re not the same soul, not really, more analogous to a child or even a clone of the original, but you could also argue that this is a brand-new soul as well, the same way splitting a worm into two gets you two living, breathing worms. The significance of Buddy’s revival never occurred to me before, but essentially, I created a new soul, a new eternal vessel that might one day enter the cycle of reincarnation to be reborn anew.
Not today though. Today, we’re skipping over reincarnation and crafting my doggo a new body to inhabit, because it’s high time the rest of the family met him too.
I know almost nothing of canine anatomy, but that doesn’t matter, because I’m not the one pulling all the strings. Buddy is, and he’s not concerned by all the details, nor does he require them, because he understands what being a dog really means. It’s not having four paws, or a wagging tail, working organs, or even big, brown eyes and floppy ears, nor is it anything about his shape or appearance. Those are merely the trappings of a dog, stuff that will come naturally because one can hardly be a dog without them, but they’re not what makes Buddy a dog in his eyes. No, the important part of being a dog is the love and affection, and he has all that and more to spare.
That is his Dao, one which comes so naturally that I envy Buddy for his simplicity.
The Heavens surge through him and envelop him both here in the Void and before me in reality, a dazzling radiance without the harsh glare one would normally associate with so brilliant a light, but rather a soft glow which illuminates the world in warmth and love. The power of Creation made manifest, acting as a womb in reality to bring forth the four elements and forge Buddy’s physical body anew, but this alone is not enough. As a creature of pure soul, Buddy requires more if he wants to be reborn in reality, and when he asks, I am more than happy to supply it. A thought is all it takes to send my Life Force over to fuel his rebirth, a gift given freely because his presence is synonymous with life itself in my mind, and my heart skips a beat as I watch it all unfold. Bones take shape even as the organs swell into existence, while flesh stretches out across the burgeoning framework. Skin and fur appear to obscure the details, and the rest takes shape in the blink of an eye, and I sense more than feel his Spiritual System take shape, one that is shockingly similar to mine. Twelve major passages gathered around the important organs, all of which are connected by an intricate network of minor, one-way passages that extend all throughout the body, with his Chi flowing through him in perfect, unobstructed harmony.
And in the blink of an eye, it’s all over and done with. There Buddy stands, a Spiritual Dog, if not a Divine one, but you wouldn’t know it by just looking at him. His short, brown-and-black fur shimmers in the sunlight as his floppy ears and flappy jowls flutter in the wind, while he opens his big, brown eyes wide to take in his surroundings. It’s all so new and exciting to him, new sights, new scents, new sensations all around, but then he spots me and that is all he can see. It begins without warning, starting at the tip of his tail and moving all the way to his front two feet in an instant, a full body wagging in concert with his joyous yips as he tippy taps his way over to my side, unable to decide if he wants to run in circles, stand still so I can pat him, or press his shoulder into my leg as if trying to merge with me once more.
“Good boy,” I croon, patting his head, back, chest, and cheeks as he shuffles and circles this way and that, all the while singing a happy chorus of yips and squeaks which give away just how happy he really is, especially once I bring Mama Bun over for a mutual sniff. “Who’s a good boy? You are! Yes, you are.” Even Pong Pong expresses his joy over this unexpected development, though being the cool and calm elder that he is, he tries to pretend like he doesn’t understand what the big deal is while remaining hidden in my hair.
Or maybe he actually doesn’t understand what all the fuss is about, because he thinks Shattering the Void is as easy as turning a hand. Who knows.
“What,” Zhen Shi begins, thoroughly spoiling my joyous reunion with Buddy in reality, and I shoot him a dark look that goes ignored as he stares with mouth agape and finger pointed. “Is that?”
“This?” I ask, marvelling at how wonderful it is to feel truly happy once more, without the heavy burden of my oppressed guilt and misery weighing me down from within. “This is my dog, Buddy. Isn’t he cute?”
“How?” Zhen Shi asks, ignoring my question to ask one of his own. Rude. Even though I already know the answer is yes, I still want to hear him say it. Tell me my dog is cute or I’ll cut you, bitch. “This soul… it was hidden within yours? No, no, not at all possible, for souls are sacrosanct and inviolable, yet it must be possible for this Sovereign saw it all unfold with mine own two eyes.” Ooh, a first-person pronoun, he must really be shook. “The Void Shattered, a body refined, and a Divinity birthed, yet how can one refine that which does not first exist?”
“Which came first?” Chiming in for no real reason than to mess with his train of thought, I toss out an age-old adage on a whim. “The chicken or the egg?”
Rather than dismiss my words out of hand, Zhen Shi actually stops to think about it, which is surprising to say the least. “The chicken or the egg?” Running a hand over his bald head, he repeats the question over and over again, but I’m just happy to finally understand why I hate bald people. Stupid custom, shaving a child’s head to show they’re a child, but I suppose if you never cut your hair, then having long hair means you’ve survived a long time and are therefore more experienced and dangerous. Probably something my father Ankhbayar came up with, which is a stupid name by the way. First Joy. So girly. Besides, he clearly doesn’t understand the significance of the name, seeing how he treats his own children. Feeling an urge to pet my dog, I squat down to scritch his bum and give Mama Bun’s bum a scritching too, because I don’t want her to feel jealous just because Buddy’s here. Not that she minds, because I think she loves Buddy just as much as I do, though not enough to hop down from her invisible raft and set foot upon the scorching sands.
Mental note: check Buddy’s paws to make sure he can take the temperatures. Sure, he’s a Spiritual Beast, but he’s still a dog, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know how to survive without me. Patting his head after a thorough scritching, I glance at Zhen Shi and find him still lost in the sauce and stuck on chickens and eggs, which is honestly not the worst thing in the world seeing how I could use the breather. Catching my eye, the befuddled monster’s expression turns to one of hatred and envy, which I have to say is a first. “No matter,” he declares, only to appear before me with first raised to strike. The blow knocks the air out of my lungs and sends me crashing to the sands below, but once again, Pong Pong blocked enough of it to keep my inner organs from being re-arranged. “Once this Sovereign has you and the dog in hand, then I will slowly unravel all your secrets to discover the truth.”
Another first-person pronoun? The first was kinda funny, but now I’m a little worried, though I should probably have been worried all along. No matter though, because now that I have Buddy with me, I feel like I can take on the world, and Zhen Shi alone is not enough to stop me. “Sic’ ‘em boy!” I shout, not even bothering to get up as I eagerly await the show, but while my foe glances at my dog to guard against him, he proceeds to do nothing else because there is nothing that needs to be done.
Turning to study my sweet doggo, I see Buddy with head tilted to one side and tongue hanging loosely in an adorable expression of innocent confusion, with none of the courage and bloodlust he displayed before. Right, right. Not an attack dog. Stupid me, thinking he might be able to help in a fight.
…
If that’s the case, why did I put so much effort into helping him be reborn? Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad we did it, but like… couldn’t it have waited until after I dealt with Zhen Shi? Did I really just go to all that effort because my dog wanted to go for a walk?
…
Maybe. Seems on point for my dog, who like me, is kind of a jerk now that I think about it.
Well… fuck. What now?
Comments
Gjim
All dogs except dog's that in purses are cool. Still waiting for Rain to use the power of moisture to save the day, because after all moisture is the essence of wetness.
I modeled Buddy after my dog, cuz my dog is cutest dog.
I really thought Buddy was a golden. LMAO. I guess i skipped the first description.
