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🕑 Added 2021-08-26 08:56:46 +0000 UTC

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Kill James Bond!

OK we have now recorded the episode! Hold your Questions for 10 more weeks

Buca Di Bepo

How would you write a parody of the Craig era films?

KeeranJ

Just seen this on Oliver Reed's IMDB page scoffing at the idea of Bond being seen as an alcoholic brawler!?!: "Oliver was probably within a sliver of being cast as Bond." ... "But by 1968 his affairs were public and he was already drinking and fighting - as far away from the refined Bond image as you could get". My question is which actor/public figure do you think could play a decent Bond simply by being themselves.

oranjest1

trashfuture covers this in one of their Britainology episodes but that's only Alice

What is your stance on the Cambridge Five Spy Ring ?

Kill James Bond!

The Spy Who Loved me is good

Kill James Bond!

The issue is that if we ask Alice to do some research by playing this game we will not see her for weeks

Kill James Bond!

I was a teacher pre-pandemic and quit in july 2020 to pursue a career being some sort of online creature

Kill James Bond!

I finally rest, and watch the sun rise on a grateful universe

Kill James Bond!

It was obviously Gay Blofeld from Diamonds are Forever. L, Mister Bond

Kill James Bond!

Not touching this with a ten foot pole in all honesty, all the best analysis has been done by smarter people and there's nothing to joke about, so it's outside our wheelhouse

Kill James Bond!

I would LIKE TO, but the potential guest that suggested doing it has not gotten back to me for so long. Too busy starting a grant for trans kids or something based

Cate Kneale

I have special hatred for the Sebastian Faulks official novel which has all the pervy sadism and Asian hench people of the films, and a written down car chase as I remember, with an orange seller's stall.

Kill James Bond!

This is the first question we answer in Q and A 2

Kill James Bond!

Fucking, the 1-second long shot of the woman Bond marries, on the boat in You Only Live Twice. She's lit in a very harsh white studio light and placed in front of a backprojected sunset and the difference in colour temperature is so stark as to be truly baffling

Mainly for Alice, but if you were to be part of a historical spy agency, who'd you go with?

Well, you have talked from time to time about some good scenes even in the most terrible movies, so my question for everyone is what’s your favorite scene in the Bond movies until now?

DukeNukem64x

"Hi, how are you and how is Nate?" is my simple question. Asking about Nate because they are afflicted with that disease that normally starts in ones 30s and never goes away. A bit late to the party m8, but as they say, better late than never. Sorry, I don't usually drink and post.

Malachi Biffle

What's the last book you each read, and would you recommend it?

If you where hypothetically a listener to this podcast how would you go about recommending it to a friend?

If Eon ever tried to start a new franchise, which one would (or should) they go for?

Tarp_o

Out of all the Bond films covered so far, which one has had the biggest struggle with tone?

Daryl Hodge

Q for Devon, how the fuck do you get away with doing this podcast when you're a teacher! Have any of your students found it yet...

What are Sesh Gremlin Q’s Big Tips for a Top Night Out?

Krindy

Marry, fuck, kill; trains, bridges, bicycles.

If the bond franchise ended, what would be your plans with the podcast? will it continue? basically, how would the podcast go after james bond has been "killed"?

Probably Apocryphal

When you do License to Kill, if noone makes the Felix Lighter pun I'm suing.

What's the deal with the people who insist that Connery was the only good Bond? Is it just originalism or is there something else there? Also Alpha Protocol bonus ep when

HJC

thoughts on exploring some bond-adjacent literature? not the mainline series, but the stranger, make-a-quick-buck, semi-official stuff - James Bond Jr., The Moneypenny Diaries etc...

Sleepi123

Which part of Britain do you think J.W. Pepper will feel the most at home?

Fuck Mary kill Villans?

WhyDoIBother

If, through a series of convoluted legal decisions, the British High Court have awarded you the legal rights to one of the Bond movies which one would you want and what would you do with it?

James Cézanne-Taipale

Have you ever heard of/ considered doing an episode on the Evil Genius games?

Naniwhat the 3rd

(For everyone) You are given the rights to the Bond franchise, and are in charge of making the next movie. Your mission: make a movie so terrible and so ill-received that it tanks the franchise irreparably, and no Bond movie will ever be made again. How would you Kill James Bond(‘s brand name)?

David Alexander

This didn't get through last time so I'll try again: Which of the Blofeld performances that you've seen thus far have been your favorite, and why is it Telly Savalas?

Do you guys have a final end in mind for the pod considering there's a finite amount of Bond content?

Can we ever hope for a live show in this lifetime?

What is the worst James bond copycat you have seen?

Galvorbak99

Any favorite non-DnD, non-World of Darkness, non-40k tabletop stuff?

Dana Himrich

When is Alice finally going to explain why Chicken Run is a James Bond furry anime?

Butcher

Which bond movie would you actually recommend I watch? Reasons may be hauntological or otherwise X

How would you compare adaptations of other spy material, for instance John le Carré, to Bond?

How do you feel Bond-the-movies compares to Bond-the-books, beyond the obvious aspects that the movies can "update" things to better fit with the world they were produced in?

just some jal

Who would be the top tier guest you'd invite on the show? Alternatively, if you could strap someone in and force them to guest who would it be?

Sapphic Hivemind

What’s y’all’s opinion of the show Archer? If you’ve seen it, what are your criticisms, what do you like about it, where does it fall short, and which parts (episodes, seasons) are your favorite/least favorite

Shon Richards

Is there any interest in reviewing the Bond novels? They're awful and I would love for you ridicule them.

7 Bitches In A Trench Coat

Do you all ever intend to go over any more video games? I have been holding out hope to hear you all rip into metal gear

Probably Apocryphal

How come Timothy Dalton rocks so hard? Why did no one mention that they were the best Bond movies?

Have any of you ever watched the 1998 movie Fatal Deviation? It's Ireland's first full length martial arts film, made on a budget of 9000 pounds, and features a group of warrior monks. It stars a middle aged man playing a teenager?, who must enter a martial arts tournament run by elderly man and Mickey from Boyzone, to reclaim the honour of his father. It's not the most relevant question, but more people need to watch this glorious mess.

Miryam Weiss

Also are you going to do the 1967 Casino Royale?

mimosalover69

It seems like a lot of (children's) movie franchises will pivot to a spy/Bond theme at some point (Cars 2, Cats & Dogs 2. I don't know if there are more, if there is you should watch them. Maybe one with the penguins from the Madagascar movies? There has to be one right?). Anyway, which non-spy movie do you think would make for the best spy movie (does not have to be a for kids)?

Miryam Weiss

Would you ever consider reviewing or discussing a TV show, like say Archer? I think it would be interesting to hear y'all discuss how it works and doesn't work as a Bond parody.

Miryam Weiss

John Pertwee was going for a kinda Bond-adjacent thing

Which do you think would make a better movie: ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’ with Jaws played by the shark from ‘Jaws’ or ‘Jaws’ with the shark played by Richard Kiel?

Eva Graversen

If the Bond franchise was made in another country, which stereotypes do you think Bond would encounter when visiting Britain?

Rufus Dean

James Bond VS Jerk Van Der Klerk, who wins? (alternatively, Jerk Van Der Klerk is a bond villain, what's his whole gimmick for the film?)

If you had to teach a university course on James Bond, what would the syllabus look like? E.g. which films would you assign, would you assign any viewing or reading outside of the Bond franchise, what would the learning objectives be?

Vivian Scott

If you were the villain and had caught James Bond what easily escapable situation would you put him in?

Jazz Fox-Canning

I also want to recommend Monolith's No One Lives Forever games for this. They're very explicitly Bond-style spy-fi and were pretty foundational Stealth FPSes

Jazz Fox-Canning

Who gets the awards (Kronsteen and Goodnight) for the movies before you started awarding them? (IIRC that's Kronsteen only for Doctor No, and Goodnight for everything up through the Connery era)

Cate Kneale

Should James Bond have been Modesty Blaise all along?

Karis Ritenour

What other franchise would you like to see Bond crossover with, and which Bond? (e.g. A Bond movie set during The Purge, Bond in the MCU, Bond but it's Dragon Ball Z, etc.) (Name pronunciation help, just in case: Karis rhymes with "Paris", Ritenour sounds like "Written hour")

Big Nick Carter

Since Abi mentioned Doctor Who in the first episode, and as it stands alongside Jamley Bondles as the second cornerstone of British Entertainment, which James Bond actors do you think would make good Doctors and visa versa? Or is there no crossover at all!?

George Rohac

How will the recent overturning of Prop 22 in California affect the operation and financial forecasts of our favorite villain contractor app - HNCH?

Lay-Tex-Lips

For all hosts, 3 potential questions 1: What is your least favorite example of "Magic Watch" (be it literal gadgets or just the universe contorting to get Bond out of impossible situations) and what would be your fixes for those plot points? 2: If you could chose any existing song to make into a Bond movie intro, regardless of genre, what would it be? 3: Would "Hench: The Musical" be all original songs or a Jukebox musical of the various Bond themes and/or covers of them?

British Pterodactyl

1. Roger Moore is an expert in exploit-opponents'-disabilty-jitsiu. However, he has one physical disability that is his kryptonite. What is it? 2. If you could replace Sheriff J.W. Pepper with Bond for one movie, what would it be? or If you could replace Sheriff J.W. Pepper with one Bond girl, who would it be? 3. From Your Eyes Only Margaret Thatcher has returned as the Bond Villian. She is going to terrorize the world and I want you three to describe how she does it following these parameters. 1. Describe her fit. 2. Describe her main henchman (Jaws/Oddjob type character) 3. Alice, describe her plan/briefly describe the plot. 4. Devin, describe her evil lair/set. 5. Abi, describe the final fight scene and the way in that Bond kills her. Feel free to describe the pet she would have, henchmans' fit and whatever else comes to mind. When your done, title your masterpiece and pick who sings the theme.

Jon Weber

Isn't this just Mission Impossible?

What heniuous shit would bond be up to in Kabul right now?

Hannah Oberhardt

What is your favorite needlessly expensive villain lair accessory? For example, the fish window that took up 10% of dr. No's lair budget

John Harwood

Any chance of doing books or short stories instead of movies? Like maybe the only actually cool fictional spy, Stephen Maturin?

Regular Sized Horse (Small)

If Bond were a US franchise what do you think would be different? How would the villains be different, how would their CIA stack up against Bond's MI6, and most importantly what would be different about the fits?

George Baily

If Bond were to quit the world of international espionage and take podcasting instead, what would his podcast be about?

Chandler Hull

Which movie so far do you think is the most overtly propaganda? Like how Live and Let Die is just Nixon era war on drugs racism or Octopussy just basically being cowritten by Team B.

Tom

What makes a *good* spy movie, and what are your favourites?

Do you intend to cover more Bond adjacent video games? Either more James Bond adaptations, or other stealth action titles like Metal Gear, Splinter Cell and Hitman?

Kentucky Fried Commie

How much money do we collectively have to throw at youse to review Sean Connerys TRUE final bond film, 1996s The Rock?

Harry Brennan

Have any/all of you read the Young Bond books by Charlie Higson, and if so, do you think they would make good films? Abi said in last Q and A that you *can't* make a good Bond film as such because of the formula of the films and character, but do you think a Young Bond adaptation could work instead?

DK Jones

If you were a Bond villain what would your evil plan be and describe your unique villainous aesthetic that would make you stand out amongst other Bond villains.

Andrew T. Wilson

If you had to spend a full* day with any actor who has played James Bond (the dead ones brought back to life at whatever age you choose), which would it be and why? Does the answer change if you have to live with them for a full week? *Let's say 15 hours, I don't expect you to stay up all night for this.

Liz and Ash in Florida. It's very hot! Climate change will kill us all.

What do you think James Bond likes to watch on TV?

Liz and Ash in Florida. It's very hot! Climate change will kill us all.

Besides shooting him with a gun, and knowing he's going to escape, what nefarious contraption would you most like to place James Bond in? I'd like to lock him in an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting

How would you rate the best, funniest piece of advice I've ever been given, from my 50-year-old "DJ" uncle who still hasn't moved out from living with his 80-year-old father in a pensioner's bungalow? Before I went off to uni (and subsequently dropped out, became radicalised and trans), he told me to 'do what you want, make sure you have fun' but that the most important thing of all is to 'make sure you stay away from the class A's and the feminists' Truly inspiring shit.

James Knapman

I'm sorry to even bring this up, but it's been bothering me ever since I started listening to KJB. More of a request that a question but: please tell me you're going to cover 1998's The Avengers with Ralph Fiennes, Uma Thurman and Sean Connery? It's one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life, but it exists and must surely count as Bond adjacent?

vercingix

Your superiors have informed you that to complete your super secret spy mission in the name of Anglo-Soviet cooperation, you must rendezvous with international nonce of mystery James Bond to be given the McGuffin. Where do you meet, what do you bring, and how do you prepare? (Bonus- what do you wear?)

Liam

What has been the best and worst uses of the bond theme (or any music) so far?

Assume that every single one of Bond's sexual encounters has produced a child. Which one would make the most interesting or competent villain?

Milo

thoughts and feelings on the Scouting For Girls song "I Wish I Was James Bond"? idk if the Bond canon has anything like a LoTR extent of songs written about its IP, but if there are more songs about Bond that aren't bond themes, which are your favourites?

Aidan

What director either living or dead would do the best job with a Bond film? P.S. I listened to your Moonraker episode while kayaking in the Louisiana Bayou

Sándor Baja

Of the alternative casting choices they had for Bond through the years (Baby Dalton, Baby Brosnan, Sam Neill, Clive Owen) which one would have been a good one (aka one that happened in the Lazenby throughout the 70's Chad universe)?

if you were Bond what silly way could the villain try to kill you that would probably work?

so far we've seen dogs, cats, and cars do their spin on a Bond film. What creature/inanimate object should go next?

Which Bond would you like to have on the show and which one is not wanted?

Freyr Aloysius

In the podcast so far, what has been your favourite moment in any of the movies (and as a separate question, bonus movies)?

khaliqtessi

If you were to bring a SCUM style rating system to the bonus episodes, would you still use SCUM so they could be rated alongside the Bond movies or would you use a different acronym?

Can we have episodes on Big Hero 6 and Zootopia (Zootropolis) and if not why not? Why does everyone hate these 2 very good movies?

DB

Knowing what we know now about what damage Silicon Valley will wreak upon the world, is Zorin the most justified and heroic of all Bond villains?

describe in great detail the stunning and over-the-top outfits that you would want to wear if u got cast as sexy bond girl #473

what about flying into the theater with a Union Jack parachute

DB

Given Abi's penchant for blonde American women, how much of the spray bottle did/will you go through in View to a Kill?

Which Bond film has the most missed potential in its themes and setpieces and would therefore benefit the most from a remake? Also, who would be the best modern day actors to play the characters of Bond, M, Q, the Bond girl, the villain and the henchman in the film you would like to remake?

Tegan Thompson

All the Bonds have been locked in a room together. Does it devolve into a fist fight, an orgy, or both? Also what is the collective SMARM rating of that room?

Foxing around.

You are a Bond Villain and you need a perfect henchman with a gimmick a'la Jaws, but Jaws has retired. What is your Henchman's gimmick, name and who's playing them?

HoofieHoof

Seriouspost: What would you do with the current James Bond run? Would you go grittier and go for more of a Bourne feel, or lean back into the campness?

Stef Potter

Since we are 3 Bonds in; Fuck, Marry, Kill? I mean yes, kill all of them, but that's not the game so I'm asking partly to see if my choices are in line with any of yours.

Dr. Yolo McSwag

Oddjob and Jaws fell out of a plane and only one of them has a parachute. Who comes out on top and who falls into the comically large circus tent?

If you were a bond villain, what would be your signature weapon and/or needlessly elaborate way with which to kill people

You have to cast an actor to play Bond in exactly one film, they cannot have a series, you can hire anyone and do anything plotwise but the series will go on as before after. Which actor and what's the plot?

Sonja

Is there any other movie or TV series all three of you would like to do a podcast about?

Christine Pizan

if you were designing an evil base, what would be your bases biggest OSHA violation?

I am interested in joining an evil organisation, because of their fantastic rates of employing disabled people like me. My only reservation is that an MI6 agent might break into my workplace and murder me by exploiting my disability. In this light, how can I achieve structural change to make my evil workplace accessible?

Vasundhara

Let's say that for some unfathomable reason, someone who has never seen a single James Bond movie before wants to get into the franchise. What movie would you recommend they start with?

Daryl Hodge

Please spare me the ordeal of having to re-watch all the Austin Power films to find out - what was the transphobia in these films that you referred to when you said you wouldn't do them? I do remember the fatphobia gage was absolutely through the roof.

Charles Doyle

As the foremost Bond podcast, the KJB gang have been invited by EON/MGM to the premier of the next Bond movie. What kind of Bond-inspired entrance would you make on the red carpet? e.g. parachuting in à la the villain in Die Another Day; crawl in through the air vents as in 007 Goldeneye?

Radar of the Stars

Are the bond movies so far worse than you thought they'd be, or are they better?

Out of the films you've covered so far what visual effect has left you the least impressed?

Pete

What would be worse: being stuck at the bottom of an elevator with Roger Moore or being ejected into space?

Puchin

Which bond villian (EXCLUDING PUSSY GALORE) would you like to work under?

Since all good tabletop is just plagarism, I have stolen Devon's idea and run Rising Sun as a single night murder mystery. What other film that you've reviewed do you think would best adapt to a TTRPG session?

Jonas Schwammberger

You caught Bond, what would be your sophisticated murder contraption (à la Dicklazer in Goldfinger)?

Nukes Audios

Two things- If we crowdfunded enough money to source a copy of the 1983 James Bond TTRPG, could you be persuaded to stream or record a session of y'all playing it as a piece of °•☆♡content♡☆•° ? Also, what's the best/worst combination of particular Bond movie and video game genre? For example, On Her Majesty's Secret Service, but as a Dating Sim seducing the women in Piz Gloria with a secret option to date Grunther.

Panda

How y'all doing ?

Avery Darling

Once you're done with all of James Bond, will you keep the theme of spy movies going or move onto another genre?

HJ

You must assemble a team of former Bond Girls for a heist. Who are your 5 picks and what are their roles in the gang?

What's the most surprising thing you've enjoyed about the Moore era?

if you were a (deadly) aquatic animal what would you be and why?

Favorite drink and/or cocktail?

The Beak TM

What does your kill James Bond convention look like

praxis and allies

if we consider the bond franchise a lens into the mentality of the business class, how did the world change for them, or how did their concerns change, between the start of the roger meure era and its end? based solely on what you see in the bond films.

Erin Roane

Replace one letter of any Bond film title. How is it instantly improved?

Rowan

Please describe the henchperson fit Kill James Bond subscribers must wear when in attendance at your evil base?

Nah

You load up your dating app of choice and see the profiles of each of the Bond actors, at the age they first took up the role - who has the best profile?

Rowan

(Abby) On one of the early bonus episodes, you were all talking about which monopoly piece you pick when playing. You never got to tell us which piece you go for. What’s your monopoly piece of choice and why?

If you were Bond villains, how would you design your secret lairs and what would your henchmen wear? And would you be equal-opportunity employers?

Angie W

Of the Bond villains so far, whose plan has made the most sense to you (logistically and/or ideologically)?

Which motorway service stations do you think Bond and M stopped off at while driving from London to Glencoe in Skyfall? I like to think they stopped at The Green Welly Stop and got a scotch egg.

Which Bond would you replace with which Doctor, and vice versa?

If you could put any bond into any bond film, what would you like to see? For example, I'd like to see how Moore bond smarms his way through the otherwise grimdark Craig Casino Royale

Which Q would win in a fight; Desmond Llewelyn Q, John Cleese Q, Cockney Q or Twink Q