BPLTEX
patreon
New Podcast, and New thoughts on things.
🕑 Added 2020-07-24 13:26:10 +0000 UTCGood day ladies and Gentlemen. New Podcast Drops today, hopefully it'll populate to your favored podcast outlet soon enough. The topic this week - Star Trek of all things! So, now onto the big think and consideration(s) of my situation.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I must say first and foremost it is a fact that I am bad at doing this emotional well-being thing. I'm trying. I'm fighting. I'm struggling. There does not a day go by where I don't have some issue, with something, for reasons. But I'm fighting. And in reading your responses and considering each and every input from each and every person from each and every approach, I can say I'm in good company.
Most folks want a creator to create. That's all they want. It's a transaction of "I gib monee" or "Gib me moneee" and in between there's a thing that's made. But I've never really felt that here, hence the overly complicated way in which I try to justify delays, or explain in a messy way what I'm feeling over this or that. I suppose the issue is I continually feel guilty, and I'll explain why if I may.
I feel guilty to have this golden opportunity that I have. To be able to create, and have that not only adored, but funded and tended to by folks like you. In an era (or a society for that matter) with falling attention spans, instant gratification feedback/dopamine loops, and the want to embrace that which is popular for the sake of being popular. . . you guys choose to support me. And, regardless of my self-worth and self-esteem issues, you guys keep poking at me to enjoy my life, and keep doing what I do.
It's humbling, and I consider myself privileged to be in the situation I am. I deeply appreciate this. On dark days I read the kind letters and good words. They are what sustain me and my sometimes fragile self.
I think I may stream tonight. Stay tuned.
Don't feel poorly if I repost this over on the youtube community page. I just wanted to share what I feel. Also see attached the fan made podcast bingo. Play along if you want.
-Tex-
Comments
freedeau
There is a lot of crap out there... Genuine content like the BPL provides is becoming harder to find; It. Is. Appreciated! I have fun watching because I can tell you guys are having fun. Always remember to have fun and take care of yourself. P.S. If your going to "steam" tonight, make sure you put a gear on it... ;P
Dopeskone
I'm not great emotional words. Expressing genuine emotion always feels super strange to me. The content made by you and legion bring a smile to face. Makes me feel good. I need that. Thank you.
AlecRazec
Emotional intelligence and boundary setting are skills. And skills do not improve without pain and practice, so you do you, homeslice. You create fun shit and I enjoy it. Simple as that. I'm also a creator but for live arts (burlesque) and without venues and stuff to work in right now I am going nuts without having my normal creative outlet so I totally get overwork and that hyper focus on getting your productions out.
ninjagonepostal
We like having you around Tex and with that comes the accepting that, you too, are human. (Mike as well) Most of us understand that and are glad to support your work because, good thing good, make brain go "Weeeeeeee." You've done 8 times what a fully funded studio does in 1 year and most likely, did it better. I couldn't find a reason to complain if I wanted to. Fuck the algorithm and whiny people that don't/refuse to understand how this works.
I really appreciate what you make for us but don't kill yourself for it. We can wait for that good good :).
HedgehogBC
I agree with the Gnome. If you burn out, then we don't get our Tex flavored dopamine fixes. I would much much rather have a slower drip feed of that tasty goodness than have it go away entirely! Please listen to and trust your audience when we tell you that we want the best for you and your health. Please don't feel guilty (I know that's a tall order) about "not delivering" Because you ARE delivering the content that we love and enjoy. Hedgehog
Fat Gnome
Thank you for all that you do! I donate to the cause because I can; it is a gift freely given, without reservation. I struggle with PTSD, anxiety, a society that I don't really fit into that well, and stuff. The BPL content (and yours) brings me joy, escape, and nostalgia. Don't ever push yourself too hard on my account. I'd rather wait a bit for good content to consume than be fed the drivel that so many 'content creators' pump out daily. I'm not worried about you selling out, but burning out. If you don't take care of yourself you will leave us like heroin addicts with no way to get our fix. Thanks for all that you do! Don't kill yourself. Regards, Fat Gnome
