Suede
patreon
Suede Of The Union 30/04/22 (and Arceus 07)
🕑 Added 2022-04-30 05:39:38 +0000 UTCSo sorry for the sound issues in the video, I only found out after it exported that I had the settings on an old preset and the game is way too loud. I hope you can still get some enjoyment out of it.
I'm guessing most of you guys follow me on twitter but for the few of you who don't who might have wondered what the heck happened this month, it's been a doozy.
Main thing is that everyone in the house caught Covid-19, and we got it pretty hard.
Now we were all vaxxed and boosted so we weren't in the hospital or in any mortal danger, but it was still really nasty. We were stuck inside while the disease took it's sweet time going through my system. The fatigue that it causes in the body cannot be overstated, you're just dead tired when you aren't completely miserable. So that took up the first two thirds of the month before we were finally able to re achieve some kind of normalcy.
But then, after the recovery, I sat down to try and at least do one video or finish off the first redone pokemon journey and I found myself in the grip of one of the worst writer's block / anxiety attacks in months. I was finally clawing my way out of the morass of meltdowns that was last month and then Covid thew my rhythm completely off and forced me to put it all off to the end of the month again.
I was frozen. It got so bad I couldn't even begin to write tweets without descending into imposter syndrome & self loathing. My brain wouldn't stop insisting anything I write would disappoint my followers & halted my motor functions accordingly.
I know it isn't true. I know that even if I put out stuff that's even half or a quarter as good as previous vids, people will still at least give me a chance. I know this. But my other brain won't listen, and it's the one controlling my body.
Everything took just a huge effort. Even the Let's Plays were hard to get started due to feeling like I was ripping you all off. Now that the pressure is off a bit I'm hoping I can get back on the wagon, as I have the full outline for Pokemon Journey ready and I should be able to get it done easily this coming month. It's just such a transitional period and then boom, virus on top of it.
Thanks for your amazing understanding, don't feel bad if you feel you need to limit your donations this month and I'll see you on the other side. For now, here's some funny videos. Enjoy!
Comments
Graham Finch
I'm sorry to hear what you and your family went through. I wish you good health during these trying times.
