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0632 Truths
🕑 Added 2025-02-17 10:15:01 +0000 UTCPerhaps it was because the two of them were already shoulder to shoulder in climbing the mountain called 'magic'. Or perhaps it was because they were companions in dealing with Voldemort and both Bryan and Dumbledore knew many secrets about Voldemort that few others were aware of.
In any case, here in the privacy of the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts, with its silver instruments and snoozing portraits of former headmasters and headmistresses on the walls, Dumbledore was much more unrestrained and open in front of Bryan compared to the way he carried himself publicly. In front of others, he always put forth an air of wit and eccentricity.
It was not the first time Dumbledore had joked with himself about this topic, just as Bryan had often teased Dumbledore about the rumors between him and Gellert Grindelwald.
But the two still maintained a high degree of tacit understanding, only skimming the surface and never trying to dig deep. However, this time was an exception. When Bryan, with a displeased expression, tried to turn the topic back to the incredible matter they were trying to figure out, Dumbledore did not obediently step down from the stage that Bryan had set.
"Just consider it satisfying the curiosity of a centenarian, Bryan--" Dumbledore said, putting on an exaggerated perplexed expression as he gazed at Bryan over steepled fingers.
"Why have you always been so resistant to the wonderful and precious thing called 'love'? Oh, please don't try to use 'researching magic' as a convenient excuse to deflect my question. I'm all too familiar with the seductive allure and obsessive pull of magical study and experimentation. But trust me, immersing oneself in the pursuit of knowledge, thrilling as it may be, does not inherently conflict with opening one's heart to a deep and beautiful romantic love. The two are not mutually exclusive.
You are most definitely not a wizard who lacks courage, Bryan. When you were in your fifth year, you dared to raise your wand against me, and this is something that the vast majority of adult wizards cannot do.
Dumbledore continued, his voice taking on a contemplative tone. "Forgive me for being so blunt, Bryan, but even Tom is more emotionally straightforward than you seem to be in this particular regard. According to my understanding, when Tom was studying here at Hogwarts as a student, he was already in an intimate relationship with a girl two grades above him.
Of course, that flirtation was little more than a calculated act on his part, a ploy to blend in and disguise his true nature. Tom was a perfect manipulator, and he played it out cruelty in equal measure to all those around him. But the relevant point is that, despite being the product of a loveless union born of addiction and coercion, despite his mother's tragic death and his father's abandonment, Tom did not shrink from interacting with the opposite sex. His upbringing and the unfortunate circumstances of his birth did not serve as obstacles to pursuing attachments, however shallow and self-serving..."
As Dumbledore spoke, Fawkes, his feathers gleaming in the candlelight, stirred awake on his perch and let out a soft, chirruping cry. At the sound, the figures in the portraits on the office walls perked up, their expressions transforming from drowsy to alert and keenly interested. Even the sleeping portrait of the stubborn Phineas Nigellus Black cracked open an eye, not wanting to miss out on such a fascinating conversation.
After all, it wasn't every day that one had the chance to witness Albus Dumbledore engaging in a spot of gossip about Bryan Watson's love life - or rather, the lack of love life.
The portraits knew, as did anyone with even a passing familiarity with the British magical community, that Bryan was widely considered to be one of the most brilliant wizarding minds to come along in generations.
It was said by those well-informed that a talent like Bryan Watson probably only appeared in Europe once a century. Being able to hear his gossip when he was young was even more explosive than Voldemort's secrets!
"I thought we were meant to be discussing--" Bryan began, attempting to redirect the conversation back to the original topic that had brought them together at this late hour. Despite the seemingly unmoved calmness of his expression, there was an unmistakable undercurrent of exasperation in his tone. However, before he could complete his thought, Dumbledore smoothly cut across him.
"Bartemius Crouch Jr. still being alive is indeed the most bizarre and unsettling news I have heard thus far this year, Bryan. I do not dispute that for a second. But since Tom himself was able to survive for years without detection, cheating the death so many believed had claimed him, I suppose it is not something unacceptable for a Death Eater who once followed him and whose fate was destined to be miserable to be alive. Bryan, compared to the Crouches, I am more concerned about you--"
Dumbledore put away his smile, no longer disguising his worry for Bryan. In his blue eyes behind the half-moon glasses, concern flickered.
"You have demonstrated that you are capable of accepting and reciprocating familial love and affection, Bryan. I am referring, of course, to your bond with the late, Mrs. Ferrena, the old lady who looked after you during your earliest years at the orphanage. And then there is Severus, of course.
You have also proven yourself more than capable of cultivating meaningful friendships, Bryan.
Remus, Sirius, Minerva, Filius, Pomona, Molly and Arthur... You have good relationships with many people. You also sincerely care for the students. But I don't understand, what is the real you afraid of?"
'What am I afraid of?'
Bryan knew that Dumbledore's question was not trying to explore his secrets. Dumbledore was not a simple wizard, but he was indeed an idealist. His greatness had its own reasons.
Bryan knew that Dumbledore's question came from his concern for him. A centenarian who had experienced many storms, a knowledgeable wizard's worry for a talented junior. But what could he say?
'What am I afraid of?'
Nothing else but the fact that he came from a different world, the reality that he was a transmigrator.
His identity as an outsider was the last impenetrable barrier standing between him and this world. It was his own personal dementor, the shadow that haunted his every waking moment. And nowhere was its impact felt more intensely than in his stubborn avoidance of romantic entanglements.
To the hypothetical observer peering down at Bryan's existence from an omniscient vantage point, his self-imposed isolation might seem baffling, even illogical. After all, if Bryan were to reveal Dumbledore about his origins that he came from a different world, it likely wouldn't change much.
As long as Bryan refrained from revealing that the world, they lived in was nothing more than a fictional book in his previous reality, what would it matter? The fact that he was from a different plane of existence would be little more than a curious thing, an oddity to be marveled at but ultimately dismissed as irrelevant to someone like Dumbledore.
But was that truly the case?
Bryan knew better than most that the gulf between a transmigrator and their adoptive world was not so easily bridged. It was a chasm that defied explanation, a discord that could never be fully reconciled. One could intellectualize it all they liked, but the instinctual experience of being a stranger in a strange land, of feeling simultaneously at home and hopelessly out of place, was something that had to be lived to be understood.
Even now, after years spent acclimating to this new reality, building connections and investing himself in the people and causes around him, Bryan could not shake the sinister whisper of doubt that plagued him.
In his heart of hearts, he was still terrified that everything he had grown to care for, every relationship he had had, might one day prove to be nothing more than a magnificently rendered illusion.
A beautiful lie.
The fear that the woman he might one day surrender his heart to would be exposed as just another phantom birthed by an author's imagination, that the love they shared would be rendered meaningless by the very unreality of their world...it was enough to make him recoil from the notion of romance entirely.
Bryan leaned back in the soft chair, his gaze dropping to the floor, maintaining calmness - he thought he was calm, but in fact, the pain and weakness unconsciously revealed in his eyes surprised even Dumbledore.
Dumbledore's brows were tightly knitted as he deeply gazed at the young man in front of him, only now realizing that the pain hidden in Bryan's heart far exceeded his imagination.
Many years ago, when he first laid eyes on this boy, he noticed that this boy had emotional control ability far beyond his peers. Over the years, the most out-of-control emotions he had seen in Bryan were perhaps on that night in Bryan's fifth year.
Just as others always thought Dumbledore was omnipotent, Bryan's strong emotional control over the long term even made Dumbledore think that Bryan's mind had no flaws. However, what happened before his eyes overturned his perception. In a daze, Dumbledore even thought he saw Severus Snape from many years ago when he learned that Lily had died!
"Bryan--" Dumbledore's voice was filled with heavy concern, but Bryan raised a hand to stop him from continuing.
With a shuddering breath, Bryan finally replied, his voice emerging as a dry, rasping croak. "Don't...don't try to dig into the reasons for my resistance to romantic entanglements, Dumbledore."
However, Dumbledore still heard a firm attitude from it.
"Thank you very much for your concern, Headmaster Dumbledore. What I want you to understand is, firstly, I am very clear about where the problem lies. Secondly, you can't help me with this matter. So, can we get back to the topic at hand?"
The long silence seemed to last until the end of the world. In the magnificent and solemn circular office, it seemed that only the candlelight emitted from the branched chandeliers hanging from the ceiling was active.
"Based on the explanation provided by Harry, Hermione, and Ron just now, I believe you and I have arrived at the same conclusion regarding the events that happened on the night of the Quidditch World Cup. In the Top Box, Barty Crouch Jr. was almost certainly beside his father's house-elf, Winky. Barty Crouch Sr. should have used magic to control his son's actions and let Winky look after him."
Dumbledore's expression turned pensive as he continued, "However, after the chaos erupted, Winky probably encountered some accident, so she couldn't take Barty Jr. away in time. Unfortunately, Barty Jr. broke free from his father's control at this time."
Dumbledore understood that it was no longer appropriate to continue pursuing the reason for Bryan's resistance to 'love'. He sighed regretfully in his heart and seamlessly transitioned the topic to the Crouches.
Bryan nodded slowly, his brow furrowing as he turned the problem over in his mind.
"Barty Crouch Jr. and Winky should have both suffered serious injuries under your magic. So, after casting that Dark Mark, he fell back into the box. Before Amos entered the box to investigate, he used what I tend to believe was an invisibility cloak to cover himself. But Barty Sr. knew his son was still in the box and knew he had broken free, so he rushed to the box to control Barty Crouch Jr."
"The question now is--" Bryan let out a sigh of relief, cleared his throat, and said in a low voice, "Was Barty Crouch Sr. later controlled by the Imperius Curse because Barty Crouch Jr. broke free from the magic's control again, or was there another variable?"
"You and I both know Senior Barty's style well, Bryan. After he discovered that his magic to control his son failed once, he absolutely would not make the same mistake again. Because he knew very well that if this matter was made public, not only would his career be completely hopeless, he himself would also spend the rest of his life in Azkaban. He probably used the most solid magic he could to ensure his son could not break free again. I am more inclined to think that Voldemort found him--"
The two were both world-class wizards with keen thinking. When communicating, they did not need to waste words. With just a little thought, Bryan understood the point.
"In the brief time that Barty broke free, he conveyed to Voldemort the information that he was still alive? But hmm, the Dark Mark?"
"I have the same view as you." Dumbledore said with a sigh.
"I guess when Tom learned that a Death Eater who was loyal to him was still alive and not imprisoned in Azkaban, he must have been overjoyed. If possible, he probably would have had Barty Crouch Jr. replace Miss Cliodna as Alastor. But unfortunately, at that time, Barty Crouch Jr. was seriously injured and could not complete this 'arduous' task--"
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