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Deep Leffen Goes To Court: Part 1
🕑 Added 2020-10-06 19:48:56 +0000 UTCthe judge announces that i am freed without bail based on my extraordinary gaming achievements. i turn to my parents and say, "fuck you for never believing in me." my parents breathe a sigh of relief. my mom rushes to hug me and says, "i'm just glad I have my leffen back."
i feel the handcuffs go back on. the judge says, "oh im sorry, we thought you were mang0." i told the judge not to worry, it's an honest mistake that happens all the time. i said that he can avoid making such mistakes in the future by remembering a simple mnemonic device. To never forget the core characteristics of mang0, all you have to do is remember: SMASH
S - Schmovement
M - Mang0 "That's the man, officer"
H - Hard body
A -
X-
SH - Shitty hair
H - Handsomeness ✔️ (character is debatable)
D - Very big dong ✔️ (girth is debatable, length is not)
the judge wiped a tear from his eye. he said, "it's so simple. i can't believe this is the first time i'm hearing it." I laugh at the judge. "don't confuse easiness with simplicity, you goon." the judge puts the handcuffs back on and quietly escorts me to my seat. he says, "with the mnemonic now clearly and effortlessly committed to memory, it's quite clear to me that you are not mang0 and that we must proceed with the trial." I laugh at the judge. "you can cuff my hands, but you cannot cuff my spirit." the judge shakes his head, "that's what solitary is for, buddy."
[End of Pt. 1]
