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48 - Burst

🕑 Added 2023-06-06 16:00:06 +0000 UTC

Comments

Maliticus

The LZ is HOT!... Wait, I mean cold... or now I'm confused.

87894354

Thanks for the chapter. She must have made quite the impression - and no, I'm not talking about the big indentation that she left in the ground. She showed off her size and her magical power, yes, but she also showed that she could execute a good plan. Minor quibbles: "Aylin had no clue if they’d live, though she thought they would." Could do with a tweak. If she thought they would live, that means that she absolutely had a clue. "She could hear — and even feel shock waves, to an extent — of the thrashing coming from inside the frostfire prison" That's another sentence that needs a tweak or two. Maybe delete "of"?

InLucidReverie

Built up tue reaction to seeing a dragon from Zef, then didn’t detail it :c otherwise great though

Andres

Ahhhh I can’t wait for next chapter lol

JustJaine

Fucking badass

JulesBeHere

"sear past where his skull had a second ago been." Edit: "soar past where his skull had been a second ago." "smoldering and setting nearby surroundings on fire." Edit: "smoldering and setting the nearby surroundings on fire."

JulesBeHere

Awesome chapter! I really love this one. Epic prison break and I'm glad Sable didn't just murder the high-level soldiers, there's a good chance they'll survive. It clearly shows she's as empathetic as possible and makes her more of a relatable protagonist.

Eddy G

"High-level". Can't wait for the power creep to begin.


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