Kevin the Bored
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5 Interesting Conversation
🕑 Added 2023-03-24 13:49:27 +0000 UTC"Alright, we'll both get back while you're out, so just remember to lock the door behind you and we'll see you tonight!" James waves over his shoulder as he and Theo leave the flat early in the morning to go to their jobs.
Yesterday really didn't go how I was expecting it to.
For one, the boys held up to their promise and let me crash with them for now. We all went straight to sleep once we got here, the flat being in the centre of Columbus, a similar distance from the PRT(Parahuman Response Team) and CPD(Columbus Police Department) buildings, since that is where the two of them work.
Yes, I do see the irony of living with two people who work in law enforcement, not that James technically does any law enforcement, since he's more of an intern, but Theo at least is on active duty.
Frankly, the irony of the situation is far too funny for me to do anything to change it, though it is slightly annoying that I will now have to make sure to keep my blue contact lenses on whenever I'm around them.
Now, as James said before he left, I am going to go 'job hunting' some time in the afternoon, which is to say I will be using my fancy new map to run around gang territory in my 'cape outfit' to see if I can't find me some crime money.
I really have no idea what I am doing.
Oh well, I'm sure I will figure it out in time.
I leave the flat with my Bag of Belongings that holds literally everything I own right now, which is just a change of clothes, some canned coffee, because 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 a thing apparently, I was never much of a coffee girl before it was the literal only thing I can drink, as well as about a grand in cash, which is mostly made up of birthday and christmas money that I never spent.
It's already late in the evening at 8pm when I leave, only an hour or so before the boys would be getting back and I walk around a bit, slowly making my way back to the territory of the Irish gang Red Branch, before I find a nice, out of the way alley that I can use to change into my 'outfit'.
I leave the my bag in the alley underneath a dumpster, since I don't think it's gonna get collected anytime soon and I doubt any non cape could lift it.
With that out of the way, I jump straight to the roof in a single bound and start running around, kinda just hoping something would happen.
I feel like this isn't the most efficient way to go about this, but eh, I'm sure it will work out in the end, and I am proven right not even a full hour later.
With the sun fully set, and the night sky greeting the world, I spy a pair of men wearing matching green bandannas who are doing what is clearly a shady deal with some other guy just on the corner of the street.
If I had to guess, it's a drug deal, I'm not sure what gave it away, but it might have been the ziplock bag filled with white powder trading hands, but hey, what do I know? Maybe there's a sugar shortage and this guy can't live without his morning coffee with two sugars-
Aaand he's just put some on his hand and snorted it.
Well, that's fun. I'm just going to wait for him to leave before I go and have a 'friendly conversation' with those two fellows down there on the street like a pair of mortals, only cool guys like me ride the rooftops.
That was such a lame thing to say, even without anyone to hear me I'm embarrassed for just thinking it.
Whatever, they're alone now and no one else seems to be occupying the street, so now is my time to shine.
Sneaking across the rooftops, keeping to the shadows, I arrive on the building that they are standing underneath and approach the edge, contemplating how to go about this.
One option is to simply jump down, but the other, cooler option, is to use my freaky blood ribbon things that grow from my back and use them to hang upside down so they can only see my face without looking up.
It would certainly add to the intimidation factor, the blatant use of powers means they wouldn't be able to rationalise things until they think they could stand a chance against me, but then there's the fact that no one knows about my ability and it's just common sense to keep an ace in the hole.
Anyone who doesn't get that has clearly never cheated at, I mean, played poker.
Decision made, I crouch on the edge and listen in on my vict- future conversation partners, so I can get a nice and dramatic opening to enter from, only to freeze once I actually start listening to them.
"-ook, I'm not saying ye're fucked in the head, but how could ya possibly 𝘧𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘻𝘦 the fecking 𝘚𝘪𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘢𝘯? Do ya not get how fucked that is?" Drug Dealer Numero Uno says with completely understandable incredulity.
However, Drug Dealer Duo, clearly disagrees, "First of all, vore has been a fetish since the 90s, secondly she literally walks around naked, 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦, and you can't honestly tell me that the Siberian isn't really fecking hot, just physically speaking, lastly, don't kink shame me." Comes DDD's vehement rebuttal that stuns both Uno and I into momentary silence.
After a moment passes, Uno regains his composure and proceeds to really rip into Mr DDD.
"No, I will shame you, vore is fecked, it's literally cannibalism! What part of being eaten could 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘺 be fecking erotic!? Not ta' mention, who gives a feck if the Siberian has a hot body, she's still a 𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘣𝘢𝘭 and 𝘢 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘚𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘕𝘪𝘯𝘦! You need to see a fucking shrink Shaun."
"I d'nay need a fecking shrink Sean!" DDD responds, his voice rising with his agitation, "It's not like my art is hurting anybody! Just 'cuz I like to draw it, doesn't mean I'm gonna fecking 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺. It's just fantasy! I know you watch incest shit, you don't hear me saying your gonna literally fuck your mother, do you?!"
I ignore Uno's response as their argument gets more heated and instead just think to myself.
How the fuck am I supposed to insert myself into this?
I didn't think they would be having such a strange conversation, and frankly DDD is making me a little uncomfortable, since he is basically fetishizing me.
At the very least, I am definitely not going to be eating that guy, not that I'm really even hungry right now but still.
Should I just jump down now? The argument doesn't seem to be ending..
Maybe I can just act like I dropped down as soon as I saw them, and that I didn't hear any of their conversation?
Fuck it, I will do that, I'm wasting time just sitting here otherwise.
Decision made, I don't waste any more time and jump forward slightly, landing in front of them in a crouch, enjoying the way their eyes widen in shock at my sudden appearance.
I had decided how I was going to act in my 'cape persona' back when I got my mask. See, I believe that a life you don't enjoy is not a life worth living, so whatever it is that I am doing, I strive to at the very least, make sure that I enjoy myself and have a little fun.
So, considering the clown mask, which is pure white with a pair of eyeholes that properly display my own glowing red irises, with a pink tear trailing down below my right eye and a black triangle pointing up above my left and a wide, toothy smile with lips almost as red as my eyes and teeth that I painted black.
I decided that it only makes sense to be more 'energetic' as it were.
It also help for intimidation. It's basic math really, the human mind that is, push certain buttons and you get specific reactions, I've always felt that people overcomplicate the act of inter-personal relations.
On one hand I could be demanding and threatening, but on the other I could be completely casual and threatening, and that is generally far scarier, since it gives off the image that you are so far beneath me that I don't even need to put on any airs.
Pushing my thoughts to the back of my head, I leap up from my crouch and flash the two Irishmen a peace sign.
"Aaand she sticks the landing! Hey there! Lovely night out huh?" I speak with a positively cheerful tone as the two fetishists gather their bearings and immediately set out to conform to stereotypes.
"Who the fuck are you!? This is Red Branch territory, if you're here to cause trouble then fuck of, you might be a cape but that doesn't mean Cu won't feckin' spear you!" DDD threatens, even as he takes a step back after looking into my eyes.
Honestly, after meeting with James and Theo, I'm kinda glad for the normalcy of a gangbanger being a typical gangbanger.
Still, I want to keep up the juxtaposition between innocence and scariness, so I make sure to choose my words carefully, my every action measured.
"Uwaaah~ so scary~" I whine as I take a step back and crouch down, putting my hands over my mask, but peaking through my fingers, making sure my eyes never leave theirs, even as I speak as childishly as I can, sounding like a child throwing a tantrum at first, before my voice drops low and quiet with a threatening edge that they clearly don't miss, "I only wanted to talk!~ But I guess we can skip to the end if you want?"
Not waiting for them to respond, I lurch forward faster than they can properly react and grab them both by the face before slamming both of my hands down to the pavement below, making sure to control my strength so that I don't injure them too much.
"My my~ You guys are like, sooo~ clumsy, falling over like that," I quip with the inflection of a typical white trash woman, "maybe if you answer some of my questions, I'll help you up?"
Looking past where my hands are holding the two of them down, I can tell that my act of instability is working just fine if the fear in their eyes is anything to go off, why I can practically smell it.
Wait, is that a feature of my power? Can I literally smell fear?
Something to test later, business first.
"F-fuck you! F-fucking p-psycho bitch! I ain't no snit-" Uno is, unfortunately cut off before he can finish by his own bloodcurdling scream as, once again faster than they can react, I move my hand from his face to his arm and using my leg on his torso as leverage, I rip his entire arm off from the base in one brutal move.
"Sh-sh shhh. There's no need to scream, everything's going to be ok" I hush him, knowing full well how hypocritical it is to pretend to care for his well being at this point.
But he isn't the important one here anyway, this show is all for ol' Triple D.
And as Uno's whimpers die down to light sobs as he starts to get woozy from blood loss, I turn to my other new friend and one look in his blown wide eyes and I can tell that he will tell me everything I want to know, and so I started asking my questions.
Less than an hour later and I am back to jumping across the rooftops, only this time with an actual direction in mind.
