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The Simulacrum - Chapter 102 - Part 1
🕑 Added 2023-01-08 18:38:11 +0000 UTC"Look, ue-sama! Look! They have massage chairs over here!" Ichiko exclaimed and ran across the entire lounge, making some frankly comical noises as her bunny slippers slapped against the tatami-mat-covered floor.
"Did you say 'massage chair'?" Arnwald perked up at once and followed after the tiny miko, despite still holding his enormous luggage under his arms.
"Why don't you put the bags down first?" Morgana spoke up while accompanying him, but he only scoffed at the idea.
"Oh please, Sister Morgana. I told you, my back is fine."
"And you should make sure to keep it that way," Ms. Gorgon retorted and all but pulled the big duffel bag out of his hand before handing it over to the nearby Galatea, and she accepted it with a dutiful 'Affirmative'.
"These really remind Rinne of her homeland," Mountain Girl mused, followed by a forlorn sigh. "Rinne's high school class used to visit the local onsen during Tanabata, and Rinne would spend hours relaxing her muscles after soaking in the yang energies of the hot spring."
"That's right!" the foxy miko agreed, though she was considerably more upbeat about the topic, and quickly climbed onto one of the massage chairs with an ear-to-ear grin.
That was an eclectic collection of people if there ever was one. If someone told me 'A shrine maiden, a ninja, two knights, and an android walks into a hot springs resort', I would've immediately braced myself for a very lame (and equally tortured) dad joke, yet here we were. Not that the average onlooker would've even suspected that there was anything out of the ordinary with these people, considering they were all wearing casual clothes, but still.
In detail, Rinne was still sporting her usual ensemble, but as for Ichiko, we managed to convince her to switch her miko outfit out for a more season-appropriate sweater and leggings combo, while Mr. Eagle Knight apparently decided to follow the trend set by his epic sideburns and donned a black leather biker jacket and a pair of thick jeans. Even Morgana let loose a little, literally, as she undid her usual hair bun and wore a black sweater with blue jeans. The only odd one out was Galatea, as even though she wore a sensible beige jumper with equally plain brown pants, she still had her robotic earmuff things on her head. They were apparently very, very crucial and couldn't be removed, so in the end we agreed that if anyone asked about them, we'd say she was really into cosplay.
Not that there was anyone who could potentially ask any questions here, as my initial fears had proven to be far from unfounded. According to the receptionist lady at the main entrance, mom-in-law seriously reserved the entire place for us. Now granted, this wasn't one of those huge bathhouse complexes, but rather more of a mid-sized traditional establishment, but the main lounge still felt way too empty with just us in it.
Speaking of the lounge, it was yet another example of the oddly yet consistently eclectic cultural mish-mash of Critias as a whole. As I mentioned before, the floor was covered with thick tatami mats that made soft creaking noises with every step we took, yet the walls were more reminiscent of one of those picturesque mountainside wooden lodges, with some vaulted ceilings and carved wooden columns thrown in, for good measure. At the far end of the hall, the first batch of our group was busy observing the four leather recliner massage chairs, facing a huge flat-screen TV. It was currently tuned in to some kind of wellness channel, but that was neither here nor there.
The wall on our right was occupied by a row of arcade cabinets, with a fancy air hockey table serving as the centerpiece of the gaming corner, while the rest of the floor was taken up by various sitting apparatuses, from modern sofas in front of the large windows to padded divans couches arranged in a circle in the middle. Last, but not least, in the back I could see a large map of the resort, with a bunch of arrows pointing at various services provided by the establishment. At a glance, I could already make out the ones pointing at the open-air baths, the normal sauna, the special sauna, and then the large gate leading into the indoor baths, but there were a couple of others that were hander to identify.
I was just about to walk over and take a closer look at the map (and maybe figure out what made the special sauna so special), but I was interrupted by someone practically pushing me aside.
"Comin' ben, comin' ben!"
Our Mr. Minotaur, unsubtle as always, pushed the swing door open with his foot and made his way into the lounge. It would've been hard to recognize him at a glance (if not for his voice, of course), as he was carrying a small mountain of cases, luggage, and other assorted bags in various sizes and colors.
"Be careful, Duncan," Roland pushed past him, though only to keep the door open.
"A'm aye canny," the big guy scoffed and placed all that baggage onto the floor, and then he theatrically stretched his back. In stark contrast with the rest of us, who were dressed at least nominally season-appropriately, he was wearing an honest-to-goodness tacky Hawaiian shirt with a pair of cargo shorts and a baseball cap. Was he trying to invoke the stereotypical annoying tourist look on purpose, or by chance, I wondered?
"Thanks, Duncan! You're a life-saver!" my redhead sister chirped with a bright smile, and entered with a raised hand. Unlike the big guy, she was properly dressed for winter, scarf and beany included. Incidentally, it only made Duncan stick out of the crowd even harder.
"Na kinch, Penny-gurl!" The big oaf grinned back and gave her a high-five.
"Yes, thank you," my other sister added once she arrived at the scene, and this time Mr. Minotaur responded with a much more subdued, "Yoo're welcoom tay, Ah s'pose."
"Snowy, look! They have games here!" Penny all but squeed the moment she laid her eyes on the arcade-corner, and pulled my Abyssal sister over before she even had a chance to object.
"Kihihi! Sure, we can try making a catalyst like that!"
"Can it be put into the Magiformer?" Josh inquired, appearing in the company of our resident mad scientist, and after some thinking, Fred sent me a glance.
"Probably? We should ask the boss about it."
"Oh, no you don't!" Before either of them could reach, Josh was forcibly pulled over by her childhood friend, currently sporting one of those curled sideways-ponytails that never made much sense to me, combined with a large beret. She made it work, somehow. "We're on a vacation! Stop talking about business!"
"It's not really business…" Josh moaned, but followed her lead as she pulled him over to the map. In the meantime, Fred made his way over to me and let out a jaunty whistle.
"Wow, boss. This place is pretty neat!"
"Looks that way." I waited for a beat, then decided to prod him a little. "What were you talking about with Josh right now? Some kind of catalyst?"
"Kihihi. Don't worry, boss. It's just a side project. Purely theoretical at the moment."
I let out an intrigued hum, but before I could ask for details, Fred was displaced by my girlfriend closing our procession. Elly was looking all over the place like a kid in the candy shop, though I was pretty sure she must've had seen much fancier hotels and resorts already, while my dear assistant was seemingly absorbed into the brochure she was holding.
"Oooh! This place is so cozy! I love it!" my draconian girlfriend exclaimed as she entwined our arms, inadvertently pushing Fred aside. He didn't seem to mind too much though and soon headed for the group at the massage-chair corner, leaving me behind with my girlfriends. Also, Duncan and Roland, but they were busy organizing the luggage on the floor, so they didn't count.
"It sure is," I spoke a tad absentmindedly as I tried to peek at what Judy was reading. I couldn't really manage, and using Far Sight for something like that was wasteful, so I simply asked, "What did you find?"
"I'm looking at the VIP room service options," my dear assistant told me without looking up from the pamphlet. "We need a breakfast menu that's rich in protein. The same goes for lunch. Dinner too." She paused here and glanced up at my other girlfriend. "Elly? Did we pack the energy drinks?"
"They're in the blue bag," the princess responded without missing a beat, and Judy let out a content hum in return.
There was something that caught my attention just now, so when neither of them spoke up again, I quickly asked, "What was that about VIP service?"
"We've got the VIP suite," Judy told me matter-of-factly and showed me the brochure on her own. "Or rather, one of them. There's three."
"How come I'm not surprised?" I mumbled under my breath and was just about to take it from her when we were suddenly interrupted.
"Elly!"
Angie ran to us like she wanted to tackle my girlfriend, but came to a screeching halt just before she hit us, and enthusiastically pointed behind herself.
"Look over there!"
My draconic girlfriend first blinked in surprise, but then her gaze followed her finger and landed on the air hockey table.
"Oh? Is this a challenge?" my dear princess inquired with an uncharacteristically wolfish grin.
"You bet!" our friendly neighborhood Celestial answered with a matching smirk of her own, and before I knew it, Elly already let go of me and followed after her.
"Oh, come on, girls! At least unpack first!"
My pleas, predictably, fell on deaf ears. My other girlfriend, in the meantime, took the princess's place like it was the most natural thing in the world and gestured for me to pay attention.
"It says here that all of the rooms are for two, with separate beds."
"All of them?" came a surprised question from our left, and I found Josh leaning over my dear assistant's head to take a peek at the brochure.
"When did you come back?"
"Just now," he responded with a shrug. "There's not much for me to do once Angie gets fired up like that, so I figured I'd come over. More importantly, what was that about two-bed rooms?"
"Aye. Whit's that aboot?" came the next new voice, this time from Duncan, who was peering over my shoulder.
"It says it right here." Judy unfolded the paper in her hands and pointed at a table. "The standard rooms are all upstairs, and they come with standard room service and unlimited communal bath and sauna usage, while the VIP rooms are on the ground floor, and they not only come with extra breakfast menus, they have separate outdoor spring baths."
"That's not what we're curious about," Josh cut in and reached over to poke at the pamphlet. "Are you saying all of these rooms are for two people each?"
"I believe that's what the receptionist said, yes," Roland butted in, adding to our impromptu huddle. "Is there a problem with that?"
"Erm… Maybe? Let me count." Josh glanced around and pointed at everyone in turn before he returned to the conversation. "And with me, that's fifteen. Do we have enough rooms?"
"Of course we do," I spoke up, followed by an eye-roll. "Do you seriously think we would've made an elementary mistake like that?"
"Hey, I'm just asking," my friend backpedaled, and in the meantime, Judy turned the page around and pointed at the smaller version of the same map I'd already seen on the wall when we entered the lounge.
"It says three VIP rooms and twelve standard rooms. It should be more than enough."
"Oh, that's good." Josh nodded, then after a beat, asked the question on everyone's minds. "Sooo… Who's getting the VIP rooms?"
"Dibs," Judy declared, causing everyone to look at her funny. "I said dibs. One is ours."
"I believe that was self-evident," Roland noted on the side, and the rest of us nodded along.
"So long as we're clear on that," my dear assistant grumbled, no doubt feeling a tad embarrassed. That was cute, but I wasn't going to tell her that right here, because she would've gotten mad at me, so I only patted her back.
"The girls are getting the second one," I stated, on no uncertain terms.
"Dae ye mean Penny-gurl 'n' th' white lassie? Fair 'nough, ah suppose."
"Nepotism strikes again," Josh noted on the side.
"Careful, Josh. Keep poking me like that, and you might just get a standard room," I jested, but it made my friend raise a brow that was both intrigued and alarmed at the same time.
"Wait. I'm getting the last VIP room?" I nodded. "With Angie?" I nodded again. "Are you serious?"
"Sure. Since you've only just started dating, I imagine you'd appreciate the privacy."
"VIP rooms have their own minibars and toilets, they are separated from the main building and fenced around, so nobody can hear or see what the occupants are doing, and since they have their own baths, it's very convenient to clean up in them. They're great."
I sent a wry glance at my dear girlfriend and raised a hand to roughly rub her noggin.
"Too much information, Dormouse. Too much information."
"I suppose the rest of us have to divide the standard rooms then," Roland noted a touch absently, but then he paused and cleared his throat to get my attention. "On second thought, there might be a small issue remaining."
"What do you mean?"
"Since the rooms only have two beds, wouldn't it pose a problem for the three of you?"
"Right, that's an issue," Josh interjected with a troubled frown. "Should we bring over one of the beds from the other rooms?"
"Are we even allowed to do that?" Roland asked back, so before they could get too worked up over the topic, I stopped rubbing Judy's head and raised a palm to halt them.
"Hold your horses, people. I don't need a bed."
"Ye dinnae? Howfur come?"
I glanced over at the big guy behind me and nonchalantly told him, "It's not a problem because I won't be sleeping."
There was a long beat, but instead of any further inquiries, Duncan started snickering, and he soon descended into full-blown chortles.
"What? What did I say?"
Ignoring my confusion, Roland shook his head and stepped away from us.
"I'll go talk with the others about the room arrangements."
"Wait, don't just leave like that!"
In the meantime, Mr. Minotaur also walked off and exclaimed, "Hey, Penny-gurl? Listen tae this! Yer brother's nae planning tae kip while staying ower 'ere! Ye get it? It's coz ay his burds!"
"A-Awawa! Duncan, don't shout! I-It's private, and none of our business!"
My knightly sister tried her best to rein in the still cackling oaf, with little success, and even Josh excused himself in short order, leaving me in the sole company of Judy.
"We barely arrived, and we already had our first misunderstanding," I grumbled, followed up by a shallow sigh. "This does not bode well."
I expected my dear assistant to agree with me, but instead she looked up at me, cocked her head to the side, and after a long beat she simply uttered, "What misunderstanding?"
Comments
Danielle Warvel
She probably is. Leo even mentioned how he was a little worried she felt like she had to compensate for originally being a background character.
Orion Dye
Judy has gone past enthusiastic and is edging into Nympho territory. Im starting to think shes compensating for something.
Danielle Warvel
Hahaha. Judy’s response. 🤣
