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Chapter 12: Rough Deal

🕑 Added 2024-12-11 13:12:09 +0000 UTC

Comments

CosmicQuill

Hi, thanks for the feedback. Can you please elaborate whan you meant by the unreasonable without gain? I'm writing the story from Jayden's perspective so there will be some details or nuances that goes right over his head and I can't exactly switch between POVs mid chapter without breaking the immersion.

Storyflower

That kind of unreasonable without gain stops the story. The author seems to have a habit of making the opponents of the MC into mindless 1-dimensional characters. It would be good to put some of the inner musings of the MC in his opponents as well to give them a more believable character.


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