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Town Builder - 70 - Never Trust a Thief

🕑 Added 2024-08-11 03:24:18 +0000 UTC

Comments

David Mclellan

Why did they not have mad dog sell the location for protection

Erick Thiemke

yep - I lost track of the NPC connection completely in book 2 which was a strength of the first. too many characters and exposition and balacing with plot advancement and town development...just bad. i struggle to write this story every week

Andrew G.

I feel like MC is too detached from his wife and child. They are like peripheral things in his life so far, and so for me it doesn’t really make sense why he’s bothered with it to this point

Koral

minor correction: "an alternative thieves hall FOR him" I had gotten a lot done in those five days and even drafted an alternate thieves hall him

Tetsu-nii

Fun chapter! Looking forward to seeing what Sinful Echo's comeuppance ends up being. Hopefully something that echos into (or maybe even originates from) the real world and teaches his entire family a lesson. 🤞🏼

Tetsu-nii

Typo: /were packed for lunch for lunch/ delete repeated /for lunch/

Tetsu-nii

Typo: /especially after I think he had to give me most/ => /especially *since* I think …/

Tetsu-nii

Typo: /Or I can have it built is one of the World Capital cities!/ => /[…] built *in* one …/

David T

Should have threatened to alert Bladed (thieves guild) that he is coming to take them over, in exchange for silence.

Peter Jørgensen

more chapter

Huy Ngo

I want more chapter 😭, the waiting to long for me.

Silver Beard

Ugh, melodrama. I suppose it couldn't be helped. At the very least post his grand plan on the market so everyone knows he can never be trusted.

Eriach

Oh no! -epic music sounds-

Jo

I hope he can keep the town, I really like this story


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