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A Soldier's Life - Book 5 Castile's Epilogue (1 of 2)

🕑 Added 2024-09-25 23:58:02 +0000 UTC

Comments

HappyNoms

1) "She sighed as she pulled the short knife hidden on her hip and cut the cordage and leather straps binding her ankles but leaving the hands tied." -> cut and leaving are different grammatical tenses. Pretty sure this should either be cutting + leaving, or cut + left, vs mixing tenses, though perhaps it's valid as is. 2) She/her/her is also probably a mild grammar break, as technically they all refer to the last referenced character, though it's fairly obvious the first two reference Castile and the second her is Selene, by context. 3) "Lirkin nodded obediently, took two golds from the desk". Grammar trolling for all I'm worth tonight, apparently... This one is gold, not golds. Long pedantic threads on the internet about this niche topic. The nutshell is that Olympic gold medals can be 3 golds, but for coins it's just 50 gold or 3 gold. It comes up in online games/UIs a lot, and nerds get frisky flinging around phrases like 'grammatical vs etical countness' and 'is it an invariant (10 aurochs) or an inflected form (10 oxen)'. Good times. 4) "Many hours later, the Selene Greko stirred." -> delete 'the'

Andrew Crews

“You are far from the Empire, and Empire (→ the Empire) is being squeezed from all sides.” “You are far from the Empire, and the Empire is being squeezed from all sides.”

daniel dantas

I find it curious how Castile never even considered having anything to do with eryk, interesting

Erick Thiemke

I dont think they ever knew Ginger was there

Magical Mushhh

Weary Spirit

MrGroxy

The king's rest. Or reward. I'd say emperors, but he's not exactly loved in those parts. But it's still a bit of cheeky "I shot the sheriff" to those in the know.

saber

The legionare might cause stigma for being in the name aswell as a target. I say name it after one of the lost legionares or after Eryk since it was his kindness. Maybe something to do with otherworldly things or one of his wacky sayings that they never understood. I'd crack up seeing the "clusterfuck inn" or "Revanets Rest." Paying homage to his nickname.

Aiden Wilker

Inn Name Ideas: 1. Swords and Sandals 2. Legion Bound 3. Triarii (Was the third line in the Roman legion formation. They were often the seasoned veterans and considered the best in their Century) 4. The Mage’s Merry Men 5. Revenant’s Rest (Meaning Eryk and also an oxymoron due to revenants not sleeping but place for Eryk to always return to, to recover) 6. Camp fire 7. Sentry’s Fire 8. Chef’s Choice 9. New Beginnings 10. Fresh Start

inkaral

A Good Knight's Rest Inn & Tavern

Erick Thiemke

hah - yah remembered that

Gravonhaft

Well, as a cautious person, naming the tavern 'Legionnaires Rest' felt like asking Telhian spy to come knocking on their door 😂. Might also need to clarify if it's gonna use Latin, Elven, or other languages too, to promote that the tavern owner or cuisines are Telhian specialty in the Gramney. And cause seems like we are entering multilingual region too.

Erick Thiemke

that kind of works. doesnt cover the tavern, more the inn. Lirkin is a cook remember

Shane Wood

Kraken's Salt

Eriach

Tftc

Eriach

Wine bottles from a famous dungeon that's been closed for 500+yrs? That would surely draw unwanted attention

Eriach

The amount of things he can put in his space....lots of money making

hrs

this works bc it isnt too modern it sounds more like how old pubs were named, usually people couldnt read so the name had to be discernable from the sign art. also its not blatantly stating they are former legionaries, since that might piss off some people.

PatronTurtle

Possible name "Requiem Leo" for "the resting lion". Actually put it in latin to remind that's the language they are speaking, in a land with others

D375

I would distance the name from the legion/assassinating the emperor. If noble's or Octavian found out about them being alive I could see them dispatching the hounds to assassinate them. What about something vaguely military themed like the garrison, catch 22, or luckies.

Chachi

amazing kino once again thank you

Raelik

I think something like Eagles Rest would be best. It's ambiguous enough that it's not directly tied to the empire.

John Donovan

Ehh they are also trying to possibly create a base of operations for others to find them.

Kbzzy

If you have a really long term plan for this novel I think it would be cool if Eryk kept tabs on the descendants of his friends and swings buy every few decades as like a wondering, mysterious uncle to all of their families

Kyle Cunnane

Maybe something like “lions den” for legion of the lion

Silver Beard

Last bit; but Castille, Selene should seriously consider changing their names... at least in public. Selene is supposed to be dead. Didn't Castille already mention the Empire had ears 1000's of miles away. Doubt Octavian has forgotten about Castille. If rumor of her thriving reaches his- could be hound assassins in their future. Doubt Lirkin is in any danger... but Mages?

Win Rar

Just read your comment, my suggestion is similar with having the word "respite". I've always liked that in a tavern name

Win Rar

Suggestion for Tavern name: Caelorian Respite with a few bottles of wine to represent their adventure. Respite because it will be rest or relief being a tavern and because you need that rest after delving a dungeon. Caelorian because of the wine and art work on it

Silver Beard

I like it but that's inviting the kind of attention they are looking to avoid.

Steven Savage

Always up to the author but I think in the context of the story that they should want to distance themselves from the Legionnaire name itself--even if they want to have a subtle nod to their soldier background. Riffing off what you wrote something like The Lucky Shot. Their logo would be like a barrel of Ale with an arrow in it or something. Liquid luck shots would be their signature drink.

John Donovan

They left the legion and the inn name should denote that. I feel they should name it after our sweet "Wayward Hound".

InfernalDrake

The Duchy is human ruled, it just has elven ambassador's from other nations.

Silver Beard

If Castille goes into trade...then securing Eryk's help will be invaluable if she can afford to pay for his time.

Ivan Kanewske

Her magic is burnt, she is not going to use it in a frivolous fashion, She may wonder about it at a later date, But nothing indicates that anyone from the company but Maveith knows that Ginger is there

Silver Beard

I find it a little curious when she speaks about his space that she is unaware of what happened to Ginger. She's still clearly using her magic. It's a little out of character for to not be snooping constantly in a new environment. She did make the comment that she still didn't feel completely safe yet.

BubblyGhost

Dunno if they'd want to be associated with the legion in an elvish city lol. I'd throw in Proserpina's Retreat, aka the roman version of Persephone, the god of death's wife. What with Eryk and the surviving company in general escaping the god of the underworld's clutches as the goddess does in the myth.

Silver Beard

Name will be difficult. Not sure how wise it will be to advertise their origins. Also any 'soliders theme might be mistaken for a brothel, especially with so many ladies around. Go with something more general: Wayfarer's Rest? Also depends on what class of clients they are trying to attract?

Enk

how about the 'legate's respite' - legate in the archaic sense of messenger and avoiding 'legionairre' , and respite indicating a rest that is temporary.

Erick Thiemke

the merchant wife, had the two kids - rode in teh MCs space...

Erick Thiemke

i don't know...there would be an ambassador from the Empire. i think legion and legionnaire is unique to the Empire, though

Jordan

Who’s Viridia again?

Da Worst John

So would they want to draw that much attention that they are ex-Legionnaires with these names?

Erick Thiemke

maybe I will get suggestions and put it to a vote

Erick Thiemke

Legionnaire's Last Call...

Jordan

Love the idea. Thanks for the chapter!

Da Worst John

Tavern suggestions: Legionnaire's Lodge, Bacchus Bistro, Sharp Shot Saloon, Steady Aim Inn (Last two references to the assassination)

Andrew

Thank you!

Erick Thiemke

corrected on the master

Erick Thiemke

it still can be. don't see Castile coming back until book 7 and she is going to make allies with Selene and Viridia to frustrate Octavian. Maybe as a powerful trader triumvirate - with wealth comes power

Jordan

“Castile cheeked her eyes to make sure she was not faking being asleep” cheeked -> checked

striderfighter

Nice....good ending

Win Rar

It would have been a good fanfic like you suggested but I'm glad you decided to write it. Enjoy your work and thankful for your engagement with the comments.

Devourerofwords

You the real mvp

Erick Thiemke

1st of 4 for cycle. It is going at the end of Book 5 but people wanted something of Selene/Castile so here it is. Back to World Sphere....should post that tonight too


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