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A Soldier's Life - 299 - Castile Versus Konstantin (Final edit 7-7-25)

🕑 Added 2024-11-20 21:36:15 +0000 UTC

Comments

Battleborn

Selene rubbed the red marks on her wrists and Castile watched her carefully, read[y] to act if she tried to form a spell. Final edit: Selene rubbed the red marks on her wrists and Castile watched her carefully, ready to act if she tried to form a spell.

Random Guy

I dont think there are mercenary shifters. Rather evident in the shock Konstatin had when he realized that one was acting loyal to anything.

Erick Thiemke

nice catch....editing

Aaron Spielman

“Selene Grecko, the former First Citizen Mage, wanted to confront them directly, but they didn’t have an army, even though Selene was training as diligently with her legionnaires.“ Who are these legionnaires? Helene and Sylph are not known to Selene and Castile until after Konnie arrives, which is after this conversation. Is this meant to be the mercenaries that are guarding the olive tree orchards, who are mentioned later in this chapter?

Aaron Spielman

Eh, imho you can keep the He assumed, since it is Castile speaking informally. But I do think it would be clearer if you moved the “here” so the sentence ended with: “…and portaled here from the Elven lands.”

Erick Thiemke

edited

Erick Thiemke

corrected

Erick Thiemke

corrected

Erick Thiemke

corrected

Erick Thiemke

corrected

HappyNoms

Eryk could have taken a shapeshifter along in the guise of an orcish guide, dimension boxed up the warlord, the shapeshifter impersonates the warlord, proceeds with a reasonable trade/deal to free the slave, off Eryk goes, easy peasy. The shifter stays a couple days so they have a plentiful lead. He pops the warlord back out at the border, doesn't even have to kill anyone at all. Dead simple. Mercenary shapeshifters whose whole professional lane is being hired for just such things would have no problem with impersonation or discretion. Instead Eryk is pantsing along the most absurdly complex vaguely half-defined fever dream plot to elect the supreme cleric, rife with uncertainty and innumerable risks. I find myself wishing that Eryk's cleric gambit disasterously fails or ends in attempted betrayal, and Konstantin shows up at the last minute when all seems lost to roast him for being a fool before presenting the shapeshifter as a sensible plan that proceeds to actually work.

Andrew Crews

Konstantin winced as he rubbed his sore chest, shifting his position to sit down. This allowed him to take in the striking green-eyed beauty seated next to Castile. Her gaze was focused on him with the same intensity [he] directed toward her, and he couldn’t help but notice the way her emerald eyes sparkled with curiosity.

Andrew Crews

They meandered through the bustling streets of the city for half a day, completely captivated by the vibrant tapestry of cultures intermingling. The skyline, dotted with a blend of ancient architecture and modern buildings, [rose] near the mighty Halton River, which stretched two hundred miles [to] the ocean. He recalled reading [about] histories [of] when the city thrived right along the riverbanks, but relentless flash floods over the centuries had forced it to retreat to safer ground. Now, along the river’s banks, a myriad of port towns flourished. This region stood as a vital nexus of inland trade for the neutral Duchy, where merchants from distant lands converged, their voices echoing in a harmonious blend of languages, each adding a unique note to the city’s vibrant symphony. Konstantin saw a number of people in the current Telhian popular fashion, and each time he hoped he would recognize [someone], but as [they] turned, [disappointment followed]. It was a massive, sprawling city [climbing] up a slope, and he shouldn’t have been surprised when he had no luck. “I’m bored,” Gilda [sighed theatrically]. He had almost completely forgotten about the shapechanger following him.”* Final Edited Version: *“They meandered through the bustling streets of the city for half a day, completely captivated by the vibrant tapestry of cultures intermingling. The skyline, dotted with a blend of ancient architecture and modern buildings, rose near the mighty Halton River, which stretched two hundred miles to the ocean. He recalled reading about histories of when the city thrived right along the riverbanks, but relentless flash floods over the centuries had forced it to retreat to safer ground. Now, along the river’s banks, a myriad of port towns flourished. This region stood as a vital nexus of inland trade for the neutral Duchy, where merchants from distant lands converged, their voices echoing in a harmonious blend of languages, each adding a unique note to the city’s vibrant symphony. Konstantin saw a number of people in the current Telhian popular fashion, and each time he hoped he would recognize someone, but as they turned, disappointment followed. It was a massive, sprawling city climbing up a slope, and he shouldn’t have been surprised when he had no luck. “I’m bored,” Gilda sighed theatrically. He had almost completely forgotten about the shapechanger following him.”*

GoodEnough Name

Konstantin is such a great character! I loved this chapter

Erick Thiemke

corrected on the master

Joseph Snyder

Viridia had been doing everything she could to gain control over her fractured husband’s Empire This says her dead husband is fractured you mean her husband's fractured.

hasrul naim

Seconded! Reading about the old man makes me feel like reading an adventure story, while reading the main story sometimes feel like a diary for me

Lost1nCarcosa

I would like to lobby for a Konstantine spin off!

Blorcyn

One bit of perspective/POV shift where it reads like Castile thinks that she know what he will do and that all men think they know better than all the rest, as if we’re in her head and not Konstantin’s that I noticed.

Jordan A

“He arrived in Gramney before us! Took an Adventurer’s Guild ship to Esenhem and portaled from the Elven lands here.” Sentence fragment issue: ‘He’ took and Adventurer’s….

Erick Thiemke

got half done on WS last night, just starting the last half now. It is about noon here

Enk

Well the problem really is that we are assuming that the assumption that shapeshifters are monsters is true. I'm glad it's shaping up to be NOT true - those freaky kids + poisonlady are groovy. We need a girl/boy shapeshifter pov asap! They ARE the one 'monster' that talks, right? Kinda like orcs, really.

MN

The question refers to the quintet of Konstantin’s group as referenced in the first paragraph. And your reply forgot Benito

PatronTurtle

I think the problem is more that she's not human, so knowing her goals and morality will be extremely difficult. Knowing what drives humans is hard enough

PatronTurtle

Eryk, Mat, Blaz, Mav, Rae

Shandlar

Maybe way down the road. Author is clearly setting up the next arc already. The Duchess Veronica will hire the adventurers guild to clear out the specters to administer the Shimmering Labrynth ASAP. Eryk and crew will get tapped for the mission cause Kon-man is bringing the cauldron of souls. He won't get promoted from silver until after that.

Shandlar

I disagree with this one. A half dozen dialects would say it just like this without the "to" and that line is spoken dialog. It's actually good to have dialect variation in your characters dialog instead of always speaking in absolute Oxford written English.

BubblyGhost

Woe is us, that pesky volume known as World Sphere bullying our poor author for precious time!

Jordan A

I think tying an unthinking character specifically to racism is a bit of a stretch, but I agree that Gilda being a more well rounded and thought out character with something in her personality that makes her want to follow a strong leader is a much better approach. She should have an interesting history that can be drawn from and a unique perspective.

NightRider

he hoped he would recognize the person as the turned. Should be as THEY turned.

Jordan A

These types of chapters are my favorite. Lots of dialogue, general relationship building between characters, and moving the plot forward. I very much enjoyed it. Thanks for your hard work!

Salvo

I don’t like that Konstantin is leaving without any real direction. the caliphate is vast, and he is playing catch up. Konstantin activating a blood compass on Benito, or what I think would be funnier: Ginger, would help. I doubt the adventure guild would hand out info on teams, and they didn’t have one at the start. There is the language barrier too, Gilda maybe?

Jordan A

“He arrived in Gramney before us! Took an Adventurer’s Guild ship to Esenhem and portaled from the Elven lands here.” …portaled from the Elven lands ‘to’ here…

Jordan A

Castile said, his voice heavy. his -> her

Jordan A

“Konstantin saw a number of people in the current Telhian popular fashion, and each time he hoped he would recognize the person as the turned.” …recognize the person as ‘they’ turned…

Pope Yoda I

I suspect MCs medallion might see an upgrade fairly soon. He's still fairly young for running his own branch of the Adventurers Guild, but I suspect a position as 'Problem Solver' would be fairly lucrative for both plot and loot.

Alex

I missed Konstantine!! Now he has to bail Eryks ass out of fire one more time and grumble about it!!

Erick Thiemke

no, he stashed it outside teh city in the chapter

Justin Garrett

I really like how konstantine considers eryk like son even though he doesn’t admit it.

Justin Barnett

Didn’t Konstantin break his old sword fighting Sergius?

Jo

Sorry seems not in Australia

MN

Quintet or Quartet? Who’s the 5th?

Aaron Weingrad

“Castile said, his voice heavy.” Should be her voice

Shade

Please don't make Gilda into a animal without personality and her own thoughts. That was what people did to justify racism.

Erick Thiemke

Yes sharp shifters are dangerous

Erick Thiemke

Prob just reg army and legionnaires. Just tracking and killing those who are abandoning the new emperor

InfernalDrake

With both Archives burned, how would they be hunting deserters? Just the old fashioned way?

Silver Beard

Esenhem will be a challenge if he starts asking about Eryk and gets the GuildMaster's attention; who in turn might out Gilda for what she is.

Brett Ulakovic

5th paragraph 1st sentence says ducky instead of duchy

John Donovan

I know, but she told Ignis to come here. I assumed she might have mentioned it to you as well,” Castile said, his voice heavy. It should be her voice heavy.

Da Worst John

Good for Konstantin!

PatronTurtle

Gilda makes me nervous that she's a plant somehow. Hope not, though. A sharpshifter member of the troop would be cool

Erick Thiemke

neither was Konstantin

Dominic French

Lol I was not expecting Gilda

Erick Thiemke

weird....corrected

Andrew

Thank you!

NightRider

I am a little lost with this sentence. He had been posing as Gilda's brother and Helena and S as the quintet moved deep into enemy lands pretending to be refugees. ?and as Helena and Sylph’s uncle

Erick Thiemke

the hardcover was released at the same time as the soft cover

Jo

It was a good chapter I was hoping Konstantine would find his way to them. Is book 3 going to come out in hard cover I have the first 2 books in hard but amazon only has e or paper at the moment

Erick Thiemke

4th of 4 for the cycle. The next cycle begins tomorrow. Guessing about ten chapters left for book 5 (not including the epilogue chapter, i know I wrote half of the epilogue with a Castile POV, but it might be out of order with this chapter and get moved in the book). This might have been rushed in some points, so it might get some more words later onto World Sphere.


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