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World Sphere - 45 - Modicum Of Revenge

🕑 Added 2025-04-24 02:58:13 +0000 UTC

Comments

Karnnie

In chapter 44 you describe Mia as: "Mia was a head shorter than me, but thick of body. She had feminine curves, but her body appeared to be well-muscled from extensive training. " So essentially short and thick, meaning Not athletic but bulky IN Chapter 45 you describe Mia as " She was a head shorter than me, with an athletic build, with rich black hair tied into a ponytail and lightly tanned skin." Please correct the description so that they match, or are at least complementary of one another. Maybe instead of saying she is thick, state that the way she walked made it seem as she might weigh more than her looks convey, meaning she is dense and well muscled.

Jordan A

“The barracks were a stone building about 150 feet long and 50 feet wide, standing in the shadow of the stone monolith.” were -> was (as the barracks is a single building, not multiple based on the description)

Erick Thiemke

corrected

Erick Thiemke

it should read as Storme healing him or the mages

Dennis Crocker

Did I miss Gareth learning a healing spell? I didn’t think he had access to his core.

Ivan Kanewske

Mera and Fera had corned Gareth and me, and we started talking. Corned to cornered


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