Snowing_Melody
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Chapter 26 I love it here
🕑 Added 2025-10-12 14:12:37 +0000 UTCCarrying a backpack and ignoring the surveillance that could be seen everywhere in Arkham Asylum, Connors was as laid back as if he were back home. First, he ran to the madhouse director's office and took a hot shower, then rummaged through the boxes and found a map. Finally, he walked slowly towards the prison area where the prisoners were being held, holding a treasured cigar that he had pulled out of the dean's office drawer.
Extremely dangerous prisoners such as the Joker and the Riddler were held incommunicado, not far from the ordinary prisoners. Picking left and right, Connors ended up choosing a vacant solitary cell. His little tricks made the surveillance impossible, and his ability to unlock locks easily opened all the protections.
He then took off the backpack behind him and opened it. It was full of what he had brought from the Andrew Hotel: a complete set of clean and tidy bedding, as well as toiletries. He even would have soaked his feet if conditions had allowed it.
His peak human physical fitness and spider-induction made him sleep without the slightest psychological pressure. Since these prisoners were held in solitary confinement, in order to avoid accidents, the prison guards did not have the same procedures as with ordinary prisoners, where they had to conduct surprise inspections every hour or two.
So he slept until daybreak, until he was awakened by the noise of a solitary cell next door, and by the sound of heavy shackles smashing on the ground.
"I slept quite comfortably, but there was no air conditioning…" Connors criticized the quality of his sleep last night. Listening to the sound of unlocking outside, he estimated that it was time to eat, and his cell would be opened casually. This cell was empty; the guards knew it, and the inmates of the other cells knew it.
At this point, a sound was heard. Almost everyone turned their heads, and then Connors, dressed in a neat prison uniform, was seen coming out of the empty cell. He held a mineral water bottle in one hand and a toothbrush in the other, with foam remaining around his mouth.
The Guards: "???"
The Joker: "???"
Riddler, Scarecrow, Penguin: "???"
After brushing his teeth as if no one was around, Connors took out a wet wipe and washed his face like a trick. He opened his mouth and yawned, and then greeted the stunned group of people. "Morning—we are all acquaintances."
After saying this, and seeing these people still in a daze, Connors walked familiarly towards the location of the restaurant from the map, and said as he walked, "If you don't eat, your brain doesn't work."
The prison guard, who was not a fool, knew that there was something wrong with Arkham Asylum at this time, so he quickly took out his walkie-talkie. "Did another prisoner come in last night??"
From the other end of the intercom came a voice: "No, Batman drove his car all night in Gotham last night, and no prisoner was caught. I suspect he has emotional problems… Well, what's going on in the repeat offender area?"
"Yes, a guy who had never been seen before came out of the cell that was originally prepared for Bane, and without any shackles on him! He even brushed his teeth with mineral water!" The prison guard's voice was full of disbelief.
Inside the dining room at Arkham Asylum, Connors sat at a deserted table with a dinner plate. Soon enough, dozens of prison guards, armed with shields and guns, rushed in and surrounded him. Three more prison guards came up to him, two with guns in their hands, and one with an anklet.
"Who are you? Why are you here?" one of them shouted sternly.
Connors didn't resist and stretched his foot over without hesitation, letting the other party put the anklet on him. "I was sent in by Batman last night. How could you forget?"
The guards looked at each other with blank looks on their faces. Soon, one of the guards slapped his head. "Oh, by the way, he was indeed sent by Batman yesterday. I don't know who was so careless and didn't put him in shackles."
The other guards showed a sudden look of understanding, and the tension suddenly relaxed.
Among the other inmates in the restaurant who were gloating at the play, one of them sneered, "Hey, brother, these prison guards don't take you seriously. They can even forget about your shackles? Maybe you should have just escaped from jail last night."
"Shut up!" an outraged prison guard shouted.
Soon, the prison guards, who had just been menacing, left one after another, leaving only a portion to prevent a riot. Connors was not at all surprised that they so easily believed his nonsense. He'd had a delayed melon report from the previous day.
[Eat Melon Today: What Selina Likes] [Melon-eating reward: Intermediate Hypnosis]
I only ate such a small melon all day yesterday, but the reward was pretty good. It was also due to the existence of "intermediate hypnosis" that Connors had come to Arkham Asylum with such confidence.
Just after the prison guards left, another group surrounded Connors.
The Joker's pale palm pressed against Connors's table. He leaned down, and the corners of his mouth almost grinned to the base of his ears. "Welcome to Arkham, pal—"
The Scarecrow stretched out his long, skinny leg and stepped directly on the table. "Want breakfast? Five million dollars a time, boy." He was retaliating against Connors for his five-million-dollar lockpicking fee. After saying that, Connors's dinner plate was kicked away. Fortunately, Connors had quick eyesight and quick hands and saved an egg.
The Riddler stood by, speaking theatrically. "Now, let's guess a question. 'I can sneak up on you, or be right in front of you, and you won't even know. But when I present myself, you will not be the same.' What am I?"
Connors pondered for a moment. "A cockroach?"
The Riddler happily spread his hands and laughed. "Wrong! It's 'betrayal'! Hahahaha—When you helped Batman catch me, did you ever think that you would also be betrayed by Batman? How does it feel to be delivered here by his own hands?"
"Pretty good." Connors didn't know what the Riddler was so happy about. "The people here are all talented, and they speak nicely. I really like it here."
"You like it here? I'll let you stay here forever, like a sewer rat, and never see the light of day—" A whisper came. Connors was peeling his egg with his head down. He looked around at a loss. "Who? Who's talking?"
The Penguin was so mad he could pop. "It's me, it's me! You despicable villain! You messed up my Iceberg Lounge while I was away! I'll have to settle this with you!"
The Scarecrow and the Riddler also began gearing up. The Joker chuckled on the side, and the other prisoners continued to watch the fun with an attitude of having nothing to do with themselves.
Connors hurriedly admitted his mistake. "I'm sorry, Mr. Joker, Mr. Riddler, Mr. Scarecrow, everyone. It was my fault before. Come on, this is the egg I just peeled…" He then shoved the egg, shell and all, into the Riddler's chattering mouth.
After stuffing it, he took out from his pocket the high-end cigar that he had gotten from the director's drawer, broke the seal with his bare hands, then took out a match and lit it. He said comfortably, "I'm here to join you."
It's just that he was sitting in his seat, puffing away, and the others were standing by. For a moment, it was hard to tell who had defected to whom.
Outside Arkham Asylum, Harley Quinn leaped onto the muscular buggy that Connors had parked there, carrying a large mallet over her shoulder in high spirits.
A tight-fitting vest was covered with an open coat, and the contrasting colors of half black and half red were paired with the collar around her neck and the hot pants on her lower body, which made her look heroic. Her delicate facial features were no less than those of any film or television star. She was here to cause sabotage, but her target wasn't Arkham Asylum. The target of the sabotage was the Joker's plan for his own escape.
As one of the prisoners who had escaped from Arkham before, Poison Ivy knew all of the Joker's plans, and now Harley knew them all.
"Harley Quinn, come on! This is the first battle to make you famous! Gotham's highway will soon be named after you!" Harley said to herself. Then, she got inside the muscle car and crashed it through the doors of Arkham Asylum.
