Gumihou
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Tondemo Skill - 440 - Let My Guard Down
🕑 Added 2022-11-02 03:18:01 +0000 UTCAs we crossed the land of snow, from the skins of.f Snow Giant Horned Rabbits and Snow Cuckoos. Now and then, we would encounter a giant reindeer-like monster that was the size of an elephant, the Snow Panther and Giant Snow Tiger.
As one might have expected, these tigers and panther creatures fitted their names very well. They were all A or S rank creatures, and quite a bit larger than Fer. Sadly for them, they were all easily defeated by my two active familiars.
Finally, we reached the cube shaped stage. The stage was hidden under a bunch of snow. As for the creature on top, well, the first word that came to mind was…
“A-a Yeti?”
Indeed, it was a large ape-like creature with white fur.
[Appraisal] immediately confirmed my suspicion.
[Yeti]
An S-rank monster that lives in extremely cold lands. It has the strength to rip and tear the prey that it catches. It has a strong territorial sense, and will mercilessly attack anyone who enters his marked territory.
[8] I vaguely recall watching a documentary about the ‘Snow Men of the Himalayas’, ‘Yeti’ was one of the names they used to describe humanoid-like creatures living in the frigid area… though I don’t recall them ever being described as violent…
“Fer, have you ever seen one of these?”
“Umu, once before. However, I never get to fight one. Well, I get the feeling they tasted bad so ignored it. Also, it was too cold and I was more interested to find a place to sleep.”
“… …” well, that’s just like Fer, right? He certainly has his priorities… [5a]
[5a] “He’ll only attack if we step into his territory, so,”
“”Sui wants to fight that~!””
“Ah, Sui…”
“Sure, go ahead.”
“”Yay~!!””[5b]
[9] Words like ‘will tear the enemy apart’ wobbled through my head but… considering Sui’s ability to stretch like taffy even if she was caught… she was probably the worse type of enemy for a strength based monster like the Yeti.
[5b]
[9] What happened next was pretty much a repeat of most of Sui’s fights. There was the obligatory taunting, followed by the roar of the monster and Sui’s pew pew…
Occasionally, the Yeti manages to squash Sui into the snow, but then she quickly popped back out again.
A final Acid Bullet struck the Yeti in the stomach and it fell to its knees.
“”Sui won~!!””
Sui was bouncing all over the place, happy at the victory, when-
“Ugoaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!”
A white fur covered hand grabbed Sui mid jump.
“Sui?!”
The hand was squeezing Sui like an overfilled water balloon.
“Fer! S-sui, she-”
Fer was already bounding forward.
““Uwaaaahhh, let gooo~~~!!!!””
Acid struck the Yeti’s face.
“Uggaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!”
Sui was flung away as the Yeti staggered backwards, hands covering its face.
Finally, it collapsed and disappeared.
“”Sui is stronger~!””
[5c]
I sighed. I think I burnt a lot of calories just from the excessive emotional roller coaster just now.
“Sui…”
“”Aruji~ Sui is strong~!””
“Hahh… that may be true, but it not change the fact that you were careless, Sui.”
“Umu, Sui, you should never let your guard down until you know the enemy has been properly defeated.”
“”Yes, Sui was bad,””
“You even let the Yeti grab you. That nearly gave me a heart attack, you know?”
“”Hehehe, sorry Aruji~””
[10] I squished Sui’s cheeks (body?) and pulled and pushed until she was a little out of shape, “This is punishment, punishment for being careless!”
“”Hehehe, Sui is sorry~~””
“Hey, the body is gone.”
Indeed, in place of the Yeti’s body was a giant magic stone and…
“A treasure chest? That’s nice.”
“Umu, treasure chests are always interesting. This one is pretty big.”
Indeed, the treasure chest was larger than the others we have seen. It was pure white with snowflake like patterns on the side. There were no special decorations like jewels or gold.
Still, it was a very beautiful chest and I have a sudden urge to open it right away. Even so, I restrained myself and cast [Appraisal] first.
[Boss Monster Treasure Chest]
A treasure chest that is rarely dropped by defeating the floor boss. No traps.
Heart pounding, I pushed open the lid.
Fer, Sui and I looked inside.
“Hm?”
“It’s fluffy?”
“”It’s white and fluffy~””
I took out the thing, and it spread out like a cloak. Another [Appraisal] informed me that it was:
[Yeti Cloak]
A cloak made from yeti fur. Great heat retention effect. Allows you to stay warm and comfortable even in cold climates.
“Ooh~, this is excellent. Especially if the next floor is going to be as horrible as this one.”
“Umu, Dora would be more comfortable with this too,”
“That’s right.”
It was rather pitiful to see our energetic Dora-chan just sleeping in the bag, or curled up under the futon only to move out for meals. Still, with this cloak, she could huddle just a little more comfortably.
“Right, shall we go?”
Our party headed for the stairs to the 46th Floor.
[Gumihou: Over 600 words were deleted. Leaving barely 900 words behind. Sigh.]
[1] Structural Change: Combine 2 paragraphs
[2] Structural Change: Combine 3 paragraphs
[3] Structural Change: Combine paragraph & dialogue
[4] Structural Change: Change passive sentence to dialogue
[5] Delete Repetitive or Pointless Information… starting to delete pointless scenes now
As a reminder:
[Boss Monster Treasure Chest]
A treasure chest that is rarely dropped by defeating the floor boss. No traps.
“A treasure chest. It doesn’t seem to have any traps, so I’ll try opening it.”
[a] Deleted all pointless repeats on over Yeti descriptions and
[b] Delete Mukouda being wobbly, like, what is this poop show:
“No no no, wait a minute! What are you going to do? Sui by herself is no good! He has the strength to tear down the prey that he’s caught! Sui will be crushed in a pinch… What will I ever do if Sui’s torn apart…”
[c] Deleted excessive ‘oh noes Sui, ur boo boos~’
[6] Additional Information for Aesthetic Purpose
[7] Add Dialogue Tag
[8] Creative License – Replace ‘horrified realisation’ with ‘vague recollections’
[9] Change ‘oh noes, panicking Mukouda’ to ‘resigned Mukouda…’
[10] Change ‘ahhh/kyaahhh/ohnoes Mukouda’ to ‘I’m gonna punish you with pinches Mukouda’
