Lilpy
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Sacred
🕑 Added 2022-10-26 16:58:04 +0000 UTCNovember's postcard! This is supposed to be a tender foot massage, nothing dramatic but definitely in "an angel kneels & worships a demon" territory. You are absolutely free to interpret it as Aziraphale patching up Crowley's burnt feet after the church thing as well though I didn't have the heart to draw visible wounds this time around 💕
Because I have many feelings about this piece, I wrote a little... text? explanation? below but you can definitely skip it if you like!
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This is a very personal painting for me, I cried many times while I was working on this, took many breaks, talked to a lot of my IRL friends about it. The WIP tier patrons already read about me wanting to scrap this piece and starting a different one. I've never drawn anything from the "Blitz era" because I have trouble enjoying the scene in the first place. It's hard to explain my feelings behind it because the "Germans don't want to talk about WWII" thing doesn't work here. I want to talk about the war, the past, I do talk about it all the time, I was taught a lot about in school and life in general.
Knowing so much about it has not only left me feeling incredibly ashamed of my heritage, it also kind of taught me that it's "wrong" to enjoy media that focuses on the subject. All the films and documentaries are made to teach you a lesson!, make it so that horrible things like this will never ever happen again. How dare you, Lilian, to build a love story around it? It felt like I crossed several lines while I drew this, like it was forbidden and that someone was just waiting to call me out on it. How can I talk about love and warmth when so many horrible things happened at that time? It's always been hard for me to enjoy the romance we see in the show. I felt like I'm not allowed to. I feel incredibly dramatic saying so because there is so much comedy in the scene as well. You're not supposed to take it incredibly serious.
Anybody who's ever spoken to me on discord knows that I often bring up that I'm German or weird stuff about the language and that I'm incredibly anxious about my accent. I've realised that a big part of that anxiety is mixed with the shame I feel about the past of my country. When I open my mouth, you can tell where I'm from, there's no hiding from it. But speaking in English with friends helps, talking about feelings helps, constantly mentioning that I'm German helps and allowing myself to enjoy things despite the mean thoughts in the back of my brain *also* helps. I'm glad I pushed through and let the ineffables have a safe space during that scary time. It's easier to be less scared when the most important being is right there in the room with you. It made a safe space for me too and I feel like I'm a little step closer to letting myself relax when someone mentions how great the Blitz era is. It's funny how much it feels like Aziraphale and Crowley are holding my hands whenever I try to work through hard things via my art and Good Omens. It feels good and, again, safe and I cherish that and the people who share so much love in the fandom.
I hope my tangent here wasn't too much of a downer. This piece is very much supposed to feel warm and welcome (with a little bit of drama of course✨)
Love you all, thank you for reading all of this💕
Comments
ScrapHeapChallenge
oh my gosh it's beautiful, I'm so sorry it dragged you through a rough spot mentally, but something wonderful came from it. <3
gingerhaole
I'm so proud of you for finishing this, for sitting with those feelings and making something so beautiful. I've said before that learning from the past should teach us empathy and compassion, but not instill more trauma. That's a hard line to walk. But why shouldn't love stories exist in times of desperate horror? Isn't that why we exist? Isn't that what helps us survive? Love can shine through tragedy like little plants that push through the cement. At the end of the world, the plants will always win out, and so will love, kindness, compassion.
