illu
patreon
camera roll #9
🕑 Added 2020-09-14 14:03:01 +0000 UTCHowdy;
We are now fully on fire in California and Oregon, and the heatwave is frying our little brains while we breathe air that smells like smoked turkey. Additionally, Mars entered retrograde a few days ago, making everyone horny and combative on top of everything else. Oh you don't think Astrology is real? Your name isn't real either, Ned.
As always, the internet is abuzz with theories on how the fires started. The most popular theory, that has really captivated my attention, suggests that a family of Big Foot are responsible for starting the fires on the West Coast. These hairy idiots are addicted to an extremely spicy pepper that only grows at the peaks of tall mountains, and when they poop, a little bit of fire shoots out, causing the dry floor of the forest to catch flame feelings. The fires are not at all started by arsonists, or by the Vitamin-D deficient activist groups known as ANTIFA.
I'm just making shit up like CNN and The Atlantic, obviously. This is supposed to be a patreon for photography, what are you doing reading this garbage?
Tune in next week where I get nominated for a peace prize.
CHOW!
