Maya Ben David
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Answering questions that I shouldn't
🕑 Added 2023-02-22 19:19:37 +0000 UTCI know I've come to you four times today asking you to change the angle of my cage but this time it's different!! The sun is hitting the cage at the perfect angle and if you move it 20 degrees to the right it will really toast up some of my sawdust and make it a nice lounge area.
I asked you about a month ago to give me some questions for a Q&A video and you really did deliver. I felt like the questions were thoughtful and interesting. Strangely, I chose to answer questions in my Q&A video that many would describe as bad faith questions. I suppose I have an agenda, and that's to humanize myself to the casual random viewer. The video will be coming out tomorrow!
In December, a right-wing shitposting channel streamed my modestycore video and commented over it. They called me a Jew like 7 times and spoke about my body for most of the video. This particularly felt weird because one of the hosts was Jewish himself. Two comments that struck me as interesting were: "what's the point if she doesn't have only fans?" and "she's a paper bagger for sure."
The first comment was interesting to me because it's not uncommon for someone to ask if I have OF, therefore there's something consistent happening. Consistent yet not necessarily personal. The second comment made me think of the term "butterface", a term used to describe someone who has a great body but an ugly face.
In my QandA video, I sincerely answered why I don't have an OF, what I think about it, and the experience of being a weird girl on the internet. Sometimes I think answering questions with sincerity and taking the question seriously is more effective than refusing to answer. As a woman who also likes women, I have a part of me that's a dirtbag incel. I see a hot girl in a movie and then look up what her boob size is after. Maybe I'm insane, but I see the question "do you have an OF?" as more complicated than just a transactional question.
As for the terms paper bagger and butterface, I also find them interesting. Why can't I just study normal topics? I have no idea. When I was in school, the popular girls were like a special class of people, especially since I went to a private school. They had very pretty, mature faces were fashionable and maybe had money. Classic popular girl trope.
There was another tiny tier of distinction and that was the butterface. The girl that was maturely developed but had a normal/average/"ugly" face. She had some power because of her body but she wasn't a popular girl, she was most likely a nerd or had few friends. Butterface is a term made by children to come to terms with the dissonance of being attracted to someone who is attractive for the wrong reasons. Wrong reasons as in, she's not cool, popular, or pretty, you just like her body. I was called a butterface and I still think about the term, digesting it. I spent a lot of my life cultivating hot girl energy, you all know I am obsessed with trends and femininity. I think because I've both been called degrading things, been flatteringly and disturbingly sexualized, AND have sexualized women myself, that I think answering these questions is important. One day I think I will make a butterface video but for now, I am ruminating on the idea. This isn't a post looking for you to be like "but Maya your face shines like the winter moon!" I just wanted to explain why I made this video. I wanted you to know where I was coming from.
Another question people often ask me, especially women is: "what bras do you wear in your videos/what's your bra size"? I decided to answer this question because I think a large amount of the population (even bra wearing population) doesn't know that bra sizes are a scam. I think it's something that brings a lot of people agony, stress, pride, or excitement to talk about, so why gatekeep something that I know a lot about?
These are some of the topics I speak about in my video and I guess I wanted to check in with you guys and explain myself and why I felt these questions were worthy of answering. I think I can answer them so that other people don't need to and with the hope that people who watch my videos understand me better. The questions that I didn't answer in my video will be answered, thank you so much for caring enough to be curious!
-Your salacious and gossiping rat
Comments
Maya Ben David
I think it's good to be honest that you do have those impulses, I think everybody does, me included. You are right that beauty is pretty subjective and aesthetic trends are constantly changing. If anything, I consider butterface to be a compliment now because it meant I evoked some confusing and strong feelings from people. It's a crazy word because it means the head is separate from the body in how you perceive a person. I want to think on it more
Bill The Outsider
First of all, content! Yes! I was surprised and dismayed to read that someone called you a butterface, but the rest of your entry caused me to think a little further about that. I would never think to apply that term to you, but there are girls I might apply it to, at least inwardly. Hopefully never out loud. Am I saying you're more attractive or better than them in some way? The simple fact is that beauty and attractiveness are subjective qualities. Any given person is likely to know how to find beauty where I don't, and that's good! I hope that for every girl who I might privately perceive as a butterface, there are people who appreciate her where I do not. I'm thankful for the women who have found my weird face entirely adequate to their taste. Ultimately I hope we can all get to the point where hearing someone say "butterface" very clearly tells us something about them, and not ourselves or our prospects for being aesthetically appreciated. In closing, yes! Content!
Maya Ben David
I agree that often when people have bad opinions, it is out of ignorance. Taking the time to address them without sarcasm or dismissiveness is a really good tactic. That's cool I didn't know you were a teacher!
Maya Ben David
If you did ask a question I WILL be answering it :) I think we will have to see if sincerity pans out, I'm super curious to see how people react and also nervous. Hehe, thank you 🌕
Robscurantist
I’ll have to check the older post bto remind myself if I asked a question before I watch, but I am, as ever, looking forward to watching. Think you are right about the power of sincerity even though the discomfort of that power sometimes goes both ways. And but of course your face shines like the winter moon. Just one of your many phraseworthy qualities.
Only dog on the left
There's a Marcus Aurelius sentiment that roughly translates to 'teach or tolerate'. Although possibly due to the fact that I'm a high school teacher, I feel that addressing people sincerely (even if they're coming in bad faith) is a powerful strategy. People quite often have bad opinions for similarly bad or uninformed reasons and a little bit of genuine reciprocity can do more to change hearts and minds than all the billionaire-funded Rightwing griftosphere can muster.
Maya Ben David
I'm sorry you've had this experience! I think there is a lot of truth to that. Thank you very much I appreciate your support :)
Brendan
Don't give a-holes any attention (in my experience). I tried fighting back sincerely and sarcastically, it doesn't work. They just want a back and forth to validate themselves. These sort of people may have tried kindness in the past only to have been put down themselves. I appreciate you sharing your experience. Keep doing what you're doing.
Maya Ben David
moon winters are the most beautiful of all. Thank you! I'm excited and nervous to post it
Maya Ben David
I'm glad!
Tom The Not Quite So Brave As Sir Lancelot
But Maya your face shines like the winter moon! (Sorry, felt obligatory.) Seriously though, I respect your thoughtful approach to responses to you that honestly don't deserve thoughtful consideration and I look forward to watching your video!
Blake Rothwell
That does fill some gaps in your thought process.
