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SotD Concepts: WtD Deleted Scene
🕑 Added 2018-08-04 20:38:39 +0000 UTCHere's a deleted scene from Speak of the Devil: Wake the Dead - Part 1!
This was originally going to be pages 8-10. While I liked giving some action to the opening scenes, I really hated how cheesy it was to have Sunday literally save someone's pet.
I ended up scrapping the scene entirely and replacing it with something more quiet, and hopefully a bit more subtle storytelling.
Also, a special treat since I don't usually post any of my scripts. Here's the original script for the deleted scene:
EIGHT
Panel 1: Sunday exits a bus in Riverside, hurrying off the bus to meet her date.
Panel 2: I big happy bulldog rushes in.
Panel 3: The bulldog runs past Sunday, startling her. Its leash is flapping in the air behind it.
Panel 4: A woman runs past (a Whisp using a metal Mech body, basically a robot suit) trying to catch the dog. She is unsteady on her feet. Sunday watches her pass by.
- 1: Whisp Mech Woman: Ah! Come back! Someone help!
NINE
Panel 1: Sunday dashes past the Mech woman, determined to catch the dog.
NO COPY
Panel 2: Sundays hand grasps the leash quickly.
NO COPY
Panel 3: Sunday slows down with the dog so the Mech woman can catch up.
- 1: Whisp Mech Woman: Oh my god, thank you.
Panel 4: Sunday hands the leash back to the woman while the dog hops around happily. The woman looks exhausted. Sunday isnt happy.
- 2: Whisp Mech Woman: Im so embarrassed. I just bought this new Mech body today, its my first one. Im so clumsy with it.
- 3: Sunday Blackburne: This is dangerous for your pup, you need to be more careful.
TEN
Panel 1: Sunday tries to leave, but the Mech woman meekly tries to get her attention.
- 1: Sunday Blackburne: Now get on home, its almost sundown.
- 2: Whisp Mech Woman: Right, that would be bad. Wait! Can I... ask you something?
Panel 2: Sunday stops and looks back to her.
- 3: Sunday Blackburne: What?
Panel 3: The Mech woman continues to shyly question Sunday, but Sunday rubs her head and tries to figure out what the woman is talking about.
- 4: Whisp Mech Woman: Uh Have you heard of a place called Jacks Lantern? You look like the kinda girl that might know.
- 5: Whisp Mech Woman: Im trying to figure out how to get there myself.
- 6: Sunday Blackburne: No, what is it? Sounds like a pub or something...
Panel 4: The Mech woman quickly turns and waves it off quickly.
- 7: Whisp Mech Woman: Nevermind, its fine! Thank you!
Panel 5: Sunday raises an eyebrow at this, confused, but not curious enough to stop her.
NO COPY
Comments
kou32
Thanks for sharing this. It's cool to see the process and ideas that would have been used. Maybe parts of it can be used later. Not the whole thing but it might be useful later.
kou32
I think it's a good scene but I can understand the change. I do like the quiet part. It lets us see more of the world she lives in.
