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Lore Post #3: Smasher-Masher-Flabber-Crasher
🕑 Added 2016-04-01 07:51:51 +0000 UTC Beastiary Entry #2: Cantu PetramCommon Names: Smasher-Masher-Flabber-Crasher, Knockers, and Bonkers
Habitat – Caves, Mines
The Cantu are a short, sturdy creature most known for their mace-like right arm—which they wield with deadly efficiency. They reside underground and have never been spotted in sunlight. Given their eye structure and their ability to see in dark settings, scholars question whether they are capable of withstanding bright lights. Well-lit caverns have proven to be a fairly effective defense measure against the creatures.
Mostly found within the Dragon’s Spine mountains, there have been isolated reports of the creatures as far south as the Divine Spires. Old legends tell of a large underground network of tunnels that may explain how these creatures managed to travel so far south, but the existence of such a network has never been proven. It is just as likely they are capable of traveling above ground during the night.
While these creatures tend to avoid human activity, they become incredibly aggressive when their territory is invaded. A plague on most mining operations within the northern mountain ranges, the Cantu have earned a number of nicknames from the miners who work those mines. Perhaps the most colorful is “Smasher-masher-flabber-crasher,” which appears to originate from the goblin tribes who reside in the Dragon Spine mountains. While lacking scholarly merit, the nickname does accurately define the creatures’ behaviors.
A coarse brown fur covers the creature’s body and helps it to withstand the often cold nights. Observation of the creature’s natural behavior is extremely limited, but one scholar, “Wherzat Thys” authored an essay titled, “The Eating and Mating Habits of the Cantu Petram.” In the essay, Thys describes how the Cantu are able to break through rocks walls to find water and small insects. Thys also claims to have witnessed a Cantu assault a female miner—claiming the creature possesses a thin phallus located within the fur of its nether regions. According to Thys, the Cantu will aggressively assault human women, which begs the question of what form the female Cantu take. Thankfully, the vast majority of miners are men, which alleviates this issue.
Attempts were made to reach Mr. Thys for further questioning, but his whereabouts are unknown at this time. He was last seen in the Cirtan Mines north of Kavidan conducting further research on the creatures. Miners reported they have not had contact with Mr. Thys in over three weeks, but that he had disappeared for lengthy periods in the past. Follow-up attempts will be made to contact Mr. Thys in the future.
Given what we know, the Cantu Petram have been labeled a manageable threat for kingdom mining operations. We recommend using male miners and keeping all active channels well-lit. Miners should be told to listen for "knocking” sounds, like rocks being smashed together, for indications that these creatures may be near. It is recommended that miners do not engage.
Sudoh Lu’Kear
Royal Cartographer and Historian
Comments
YummyTiger Gaming
Well, knockers will probably be the more common usage. It just fits better. The poll was pretty split between those two in first, so I figured including them both would not be terribly inappropriate. Those crazy goblins though, you'll see the long version when they're around. Plus, it lends itself to a rather comical exchange when Bogwort tells Aylia about it.
YummyTiger Gaming
As far as the name goes? That would have been funny, but FML it is not. Damn you thswherizat, damn you. :-)
YummyTiger Gaming
Not sure if I'll post a lore update for every monster, but there will be a variety ranging from monsters, to places, to items, etc. There will also be a bestiary in-game to read about monsters, a la Witcher 3 and similar games.
YummyTiger Gaming
I'm already including a bikini (or perhaps a couple bikini options) in the game. So, I left that one out. The bikini I have planned it a leather one, but I may look at adding a chainmail one as well. If I just changed the bikini texture, it would not be much more work.
TheNetsrac
Awesome lore piece there Yummy. Keep em cumming ;-) PS . Thank you for including my "Bonkers" suggestion as a 3rd common name. I'm kinda happy about that... Sometimes a third place is a partial victory =) PPS. What happened to my Chainmail bikini suggestion for the poll?... Got a good deal of likes... Did the added "Oh and a mankini for Bogwort" bit mess it up? ... made you unsure if people voted for one or the other? If so, I completely understand and I am sorry. It was meant as a joke....shouldn't have added that thing. Believe me, I would much rather see Aylia in a chainmail bikini, than Bogwort in a mankini..... even hough he is a sweeeet piece of man goblin meat ;-P
Mizu
Neat lore snippet. Will we get something like this for all the monsters? What about country history, or specific items you could find while wandering the world?
I'm going to be impressed if this was a well written April fools joke
Not Telling
Well, my suggestion didn't win the naming poll. ...but I'm rather happy with the consolation prize. My name is the sound of impending danger. I'm now imagining a scenario where a tunnel collapse traps the party underground, forcing them to navigate a map with little light to another exit. And minutes later, the sound of knocking... "...Who's there?"
YummyTiger Gaming
Nobody said you were dead. You might be, nobody knows. You strange, monster-studying scholars are an unpredictable lot. :-)
MasterQi
You guys sure have a good sense of humor
thswherizat
Oh NO, and here I thought you were making it so that this actually couldn't win! Wait so I'm dead in the mountains now? Oh well.
Justjorge
The H scene possibilities intrigue me
