Author Frank Morin
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Ch 83 - I Make Lots of New Friends
🕑 Added 2024-11-06 17:00:08 +0000 UTCThe interior of Ruby’s Bast Camp tent was probably twice as big as the exterior. My castle had to be pushing the limits of the spatial-twisting magic. It felt several times larger than her tent, but it had to still be fitting on the same-sized lot. That was some fun Hermione tent magic.
I now had an entryway with a vaulted ceiling and a chandelier with soft lights slowly morphing into different colors. The kitchen had been moved to the left of the main entrance, while I had a new trophy room on the right, complete with a pool table and the heads of some of the monsters I’d killed mounted on the high walls.
So weird. I felt like a country nobleman accepting visitors as I headed up the central corridor from the big, open combined living and dining rooms that took up the entire rear half of the little castle.
Before I reached the door, an ethereal figure materialized in the hallway in front of me. I reacted instantly, willing Soulrend to drop into my hand.
Soulrend was gone.
The reminder of the loss of my blade made me pause. In that second, the apparition abruptly sharpened in focus and suddenly a middle-aged butler, complete with tuxedo and tall, black top hat stood in the hall in front of me, regarding me calmly.
I blinked. The apparition no longer looked ethereal, but totally solid. I sensed it wasn’t, but even to my enhanced Perception, it looked like a slightly pudgy fellow in a fancy suit.
“Greetings, my lord,” the ghost said in a formal British accent.
My mind caught up and I eased my fighting stance a bit. No way a monster should be able to slip past the upgraded wards of my castle house. Something else was going on.
“Who are you?”
“I am the steward of your estate, of course. Did you not read the particulars of your Concierge Package upgrade?”
“No, actually. I haven’t had time.”
“Very good, sir,” the fellow said, calm expression unwavering. “It is not unusual for the gentry to leave such mundane tasks to their staff. Indeed, it is my express purpose to remove all concern for managing your estate from your busy shoulders.”
The pounding on the door resumed, but I ignored it, a slow grin spreading on my face. “Are you saying the Concierge Package actually mean I got a butler along with my castle?”
He sniffed. “Butler. A quaint term. It is my responsibility to oversee every aspect of your estate to ensure your comfort and tranquility.”
That was so cool. “So, what kind of things can you do?”
“Within these walls, nearly anything you require. I will ensure the property remains clean and in good repair, prepare your meals, manage any resources or inventory left in my care, and oversee the castle defenses.”
“Wow. I’ll admit, you caught me by surprise.”
“I apologize, sir. Would you like me to answer the door?”
Someone had added shouting to the pounding, but the thick walls and door made it hard to recognize the voice. I could guess, though.
“Do you have a name?” I asked instead.
“You sure like naming things,” Cyrus interjected.
The butler regarded me for a second before answering. “I was not expecting to need a name.”
“That’ll never do.” I snapped my fingers as I realized why the butler looked so familiar. He looked just like the butler Jeeves from that old British comedy tv show, Jeeves and Wooster. “I’ll call you Jeeves.”
“Very good, sir,” Jeeves said in that same unflappable calm as the TV character.
“Perfect choice,” Cyrus laughed and an old-fashioned pocket watch and chain appeared on Jeeves’s coat. He did not react.
“If there is nothing else, I will see to the door,” Jeeves said, then walked with a stately stride across the entryway and pulled the thick oak door open. The outside of the door was carved with figures of animals and monsters and looked solid enough to stop a battering ram.
“Where did you get a castle?” Ruby exclaimed.
She stood outside with Steve, Tomas, Jane, and a growing crowd of gawking onlookers. Her fist was still raised to knock again. At the sight of Jeeves, she took a startled step back.
“Welcome, Madame,” Jeeves said with a short bow, then turned slightly to look back to me. “Are you expecting visitors, my lord?”
“My lord?” Tomas laughed, pushing forward to stand beside Ruby in the doorway. They all studied Jeeves with interest.
“Jeeves, these 4 are part of my team and are welcome here any time, night or day, and should be treated with every courtesy. Let me introduce Ruby, Tomas, Jane, and Steve.”
Their incredulous expressions were beautiful to behold. Jeeves only nodded again. “Very good, sir. Access noted.” He gestured them past with a flourish.
The 4 of them rushed inside. The rest of the crowd moved to follow, but Jeeves raised a hand to stop them. “Sir, what of the others?”
“Give us a second, please.”
“Very good, sir.”
Tomas exclaimed, “A castle and a butler? Where’d you get that guy?”
“He came with the castle.”
“He’s not real. Some kind of projection?” Jane asked, brows furrowing. I bet she was using one of her class skills to study Jeeves.
“More than that, I think. I just met him a few seconds ago. I’m still trying to figure this out. I got a sweet upgrade in one of my loot boxes.”
Ruby turned a slow circle, staring in wonder at the fancy interior. When she turned her smiling face to me, she inhaled sharply and stepped closer, her hands rising to my face.
I froze, surprised and suddenly nervous. What was she doing? Would she kiss me again? I thought we were past all that. I didn’t want either of us to get hurt by chasing emotions stirred up by battle and my near-death escape of stage 1.
Steve laughed. “One kiss, and suddenly you’re attacking him on sight?”
Ruby ignored him, which shocked Steve into silence. She leaned close, studying my face intently. I wasn’t sure what to do. I was intensely aware of her beautiful face so close to mine, framed by her deep red hair, her athletic body close enough to embrace.
“Your eyes,” she breathed.
I sighed with relief. I was the one being the idiot. She’d just been looking at the ring of gold around my irises from my many titles. It was probably getting pretty thick.
“What about his eyes?” Tomas asked.
Ruby stayed close, her hands still on my face. She was being unusually friendly, but maybe she’d just never noticed the gold ring before. Her brown eyes were like dark pools of mystery, with flecks of gold from her own title. “Lucas, what happened? Your eyes are completely gold now.”
“Really?”
“That’s totally boss,” Steve said as he peered around Ruby’s shoulder.
“I hadn’t realized it happened.” Was that a product of getting so many titles? Could the golden ring around my irises take over completely? Apparently it could. Or maybe it was my Spellseer’s Gaze.
“Do you like it?”
Ruby flushed and seemed to realize finally what she was doing. She dropped her hands and tried to step back, but the others were pressing in close around her, so she couldn’t. “It’s . . . different.”
“That’s no answer,” Steve chided. “Do you like his flashy gold eyes, or did you prefer his baby blues more?”
“I . . . I mean . . .” Her flush deepened. Leave it to Steve to make a moment awkward.
“I think your new eyes look great,” Jane said, saving Ruby and clapping me on the shoulder. As she did, she bumped Steve, making room for Ruby to retreat a step.
“Part of a loot box, I guess.”
Tomas chuckled. “It’s sounding like you got a lot of loot boxes.”
“I’ll say!” Steve laughed. “This is awesome! What else came with the castle?”
Outside, someone shouted, “Hey, what’s going on?”
I stepped to the door beside Jeeves, tempted to just shut the door and tell people to back off for a while. I’d love some quiet time with my close team, but a distraction was also welcome.
Outside, the other members of Tomas’s and Janes’ teams were pushing to the fore, with lots of other folks pressing in behind.
One voice called out from the crowd, “Hey, how do you get a log cabin to ugprade to a castle?”
I tried to play it casual. "I got a special loot box. Pretty cool, eh?"
Didn't work as well as I'd hoped. One heavily-armored warrior shouted, "How does the last minute loser get a special loot box that good?"
A womam wearing a striped red and green wizard's robe added, "Yeah, we all had to help save your butt and literally carry you over the finish line. I’ve been living in a tent for a week. I should have gotten a better loot box than the stupid gold Remember the Titans box."
That actually sounded like a cool loot box, but I resisted the urge to ask about it. They wouldn't appreciate it. The good will that had swept the community as everyone united to save me hadn’t lasted long.
Poeple were people. They loved the idea of doing something heroic for a weakling who would remain in their debt. The idea of having to sacrifice for someone who had advantages they did not just ticked them off.
So I plastered a wide smile on my face and said, “It was unexpected, for sure. Come on in everyone and check it out.”
Jeeves did not look pleased, but still stepped aside as the crowds surged in. I resisted the urge to ask Jeeves to summon a big door mat so everyone could wipe their feet. This was my sparkling new prize. I didn’t want a hundred pairs of dirty boots tramping through it, even though I bet Jeeves could clean it in a snap.
So I shouted, “Drinks are on me, as long as someone calls Sam to bring a bunch of ale over too.”
Two men dressed as rangers bolted for Sam’s tavern. The rest pushed to get through the door.
“And who’s the guy in the suit?” Andy, the dual-sword-wielding guy on Tomas’s team asked.
“This is Jeeves.”
Jeeves added loudly enough for all to hear, “I will be monitoring all who enter this domicile. Please note that no hostile actions will be allowed, and no theft or damage to property will be allowed.”
Some of the crowd paused, looking suddenly nervous. A few laughed, but then wilted and tried to look invisible when no one joined them.
“One of my other loot boxes included some harder liquor than Sam’s got. Like I said, drinks are on me, but you’ve got to offer something in trade.”
I didn’t need more stuff, but free drinks did weird things to people. Some of the initial enthusiasm waned, but one clever older guy with an honest-to-Ruby pointy wizard’s hat shouted, “He didn’t set a price!”
Cheering, people surged in past Jeeves. I let them come and led my core group back to the sitting room where we claimed the comfortable couches before anyone else could. The enlarged living room now had 3 couches and half a dozen overstuffed chairs. Ruby dropped onto the soft couch next to me, grinning.
“How many upgrade tiers was your loot? A full castle with some kind of AI butler?”
“I got a legendary upgrade package.”
Ruby leaned back, laughing. “Wow. You have to show us around.”
“As soon as there’s room to walk.”
I was intensely aware of the feel of her smooth, muscular thigh pressed against my leg. She didn’t seem to notice, thankfully. I was being an idiot. I needed to push the memory of that accidental kiss out of my mind and stop inventing drama. It would wreck our friendship.
It was harder than it should have been. The kiss might have been accidental, but it affected me more than any kiss ever had. With an effort, I cleared my head and acted casual, joining the chat and engaging in friendly banter with Steve.
Then Sam burst into the room at the head of a dozen assistants. They commandeered the dining table and pulled huge wooden kegs of ale out of their inventories, along with tankards and glasses. Others produced grilled meats and fresh-baked pastries. That reminded me, I still had several trays of pastries and donuts, and I needed to go check my confection oven to see how the new batch of donuts had turned out.
Jeeves appeared out of thin air, standing right in front of a trio of two men and a woman dressed in basic leather armor standing close together near the table.
Jeeves’s voice carried over the tumult. “Sirs, madam, with all due respect, I must insist you return the cutlery you stole from the master’s table.”
The largest warrior scoffed as conversation died and people turned to look at the confrontation. “Who the hell are you?”
“I am Jeeves. Please cooperate. I do not wish any disturbance to my lord’s other guests.”
“Your lord?” The man sneered while his companions shuffled uneasily behind him. “I ain’t giving you jack.”
The woman put a restraining hand on his arm and met my gaze. “Um, sorry. It’s just we need a break. We barely made it to level 10, just like you.”
“Yeah, but we still helped save your sorry Abercrombie,” the big warrior added. I wasn’t sure what Cyrus was going for with that weird swear switch.
“I even spent the last use of my temporary spell,” his companion added.
I rose and approached them, every eye in the room locked onto the little drama. “I appreciate all the help, but do you think it was cool to come into my house and start robbing from me?”
“We just took a few of the gold cups and cutlery you left lying around on the table,” the woman said quickly.
“Shut up,” the big warrior hissed.
I sighed when Identify kicked in.
“Ernest Manning. Baby human level 10. Team Shackleton.”
“Tim Jarvis. Baby human level 10. Team Shackleton.”
“Electra Carlin. Baby human level 10. Team Shackleton.”
They really were just level 10. Their team was cool, but they seemed to be struggling. Maybe they’d had some bad luck in the first days. I tried not to make assumptions since I hated how everyone kept doing that to me.
So I addressed Ernest, the big warrior who clearly led the trio. “Why didn’t you tell me this before stealing from me? I would have been happy to help, especially since you helped me.”
Jeeves held out his hand and the trio reluctantly produced several fancy goblets inlaid with gold, along with half a dozen golden forks and spoons.
“There. We’re square. Now, you owe us,” Ernest said, trying to use bluster to hide his embarrassment.
“Yeah! You owe all of us,” another voice shouted from the crowd. That triggered a flood of people clamoring for some kind of reward for helping me earlier.
Earnest shouted above the din, “We asked first! We get dibs!”
I held up my hands, motioning for quiet, but people kept shouting until Jane whistled between her fingers, a loud, piercing sound that really worked in that enclosed space. I fought down my annoyance. I’d invited these moochers into my new home and promised to share alcohol, which I knew many of them had been craving, and they just wanted more and more.
Facing the trio of thieves, I said, “You should have asked. Instead, you came into my home, stole from me, and then hit me with all this entitled Bethoven.”
Earnest started to protest, but I spoke over him. “You three. Out. I’ll decide if and how to assist you.” Turning to the rest of the room, I added, “Everyone else, I’m already promising to share drinks, so don’t act like a bunch of locusts.”
“Look out!” Tomas shouted, leaping over the couch.
I spun to find Jeeves holding Earnest by the chest, his not-quite-tangible fingers gripping right through the man’s breastplate. Earnest had drawn a sword and was still trying to wave it, but Jeeves’s grip on his arm restrained him.
That loser had tried to stab me in the back right in my own home. All thoughts of helping evaporated.
“Jeeves. Get rid of this piece of Schuman,” I growled.
“Very good, sir,” Jeeves said in his normal calm, then hurled Earnest at one of the shuttered windows. The portly butler had a good arm.
The warrior shouted in surprise, limbs windmilling as people jumped out of the way. Just before he crashed into the window, the shutter disappeared, along with any glass that might have been behind it, allowing the man to tumble through the gap and soar out of sight. The shutter reappeared a second later.
Jeeves brushed off his hands and turned to me. “Would you like me to escort his companions out the door?”
“Please.”
The two remaining Shackleton team members looked after their companion with open shock on their faces. When Jeeves motioned them toward the door, they bolted. Jeeves disappeared, no doubt following them. An uncomfortable silence settled over the room.
I spoke loudly. “You’ve all been warned. Don’t wreck my party. The bar will be open shortly, right Sam?”
“Oh, yeah!” Sam called as he approached, rubbing his meaty hands together. “I hear you’ve got some more liquor to add to the party.”
“I do, and I’m willing to trade for more later.”
I produced 10 cases, each with 20 bottles of assorted hard liquor and piled them on the table next to Sam’s casks of ale. That improved the mood again, triggering cheers and not a few tears. I gave Sam control over distributing the drinks and collecting contributions.
That would give him extra experience. Not that he needed it. He was already level 28. People crowded in so tight around the table, we abandoned the couches and moved to the trophy room. There we found some more padded chairs to talk while a group of heavily armored men and women started a clanky game of pool.
An hour passed in a blur of laughter and conversation as we reunited and simply relaxed. Jane eventually moved to sit on Tomas’s lap and they looked as happy as when we’d hung out back in their apartment in Denver.
Steve joked and teased everyone. Ruby was his favorite target for a while, and the others joined in teasing her about accidentally kissing me. She blushed and stammered and protested, which just made them laugh and tease harder.
Finally she rose and said, “Enough! That kiss was an accident. We’re not dating and it meant nothing, so drop it!”
Steve started to make another wise-crack, but I shook my head and amazingly, he relented. The conversation shifted to discussing the craziest recipes anyone had seen the Base Camp ovens produce so far, but I found it hard to concentrate.
Ruby’s words confirmed I’d been inventing drama over something that didn’t exist. That was a good thing. We could return to being great friends. And yet, a small part of me felt disappointed. I crushed that part. It wasn’t helpful. Then, feeling a renewed sense of calm, I re-joined the conversation.
A moment later, a female warrior whose helm sat a bit askew on her face stumbled up to me and waved a mostly empty bottle of vodka. “Thanks for a great party.”
“Glad you could make it.” I had no idea who she was and didn’t need Identify to tell me she was drunk. She must have been drinking hard to get that plastered, despite her natural regeneration. Maybe she’d found a poison-magnifying potion to help. They probably existed.
“Have any more pastries? Everything in the kitchen’s been eaten already.”
“Those moochers,” I growled.
Before I could jump up to see how badly they’d pillaged my kitchen and pantry, she leaned closer. Her breath stank of booze and she said in a loud voice she clearly intended to be a whisper. “No matter what people say about you, I don’t believe any of it. No traitor shares the good stuff so freely.”
“Who says I’m a traitor?” My good mood tanked further. Maybe I could find someone to beat up. That might help.
She waved vaguely toward the living room. “Lots of folks. You’re buddies with the AI who kidnapped us all. Some folks think you got this castle for helping him kill people off.”
“They do, eh?” And I’d invited those two-faced back-stabbers into my house?
The woman wandered off and I turned to my friends. Tomas said, “I’ve heard some rumors, but didn’t believe they were widespread.”
“And I’ve corrected any idiots I heard suggest anything that stupid,” Jane added. I bet she corrected them by throwing them through the nearest wall with her telekinesis.
“Why hasn’t anyone mentioned this?”
Ruby placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “You had enough to deal with.”
Steve added, “I’ll keep an ear out and see if I can figure out who’s spreading the rumors.”
“Good. Then we’ll go pay them a visit. For now, I think this party’s over.”
Before I could kick everyone out, a booming female voice shook the night, loud enough for us to hear inside the castle.
“Help! Werewolves on the west edge of town. Werewolves on the—“
It cut off abruptly.
Sirens sounded. Where had someone found sirens? People started thundering out of the castle, most still trying to finish their drinks.
I cracked my knuckles and lifted a fist for Tomas to bump. Time to test out my new stats and work out a bit of frustration.
