Author Frank Morin
patreon
Ch 165 - I Pretend to be a Ping Pong Ball
🕑 Added 2025-05-05 16:00:09 +0000 UTCAfter the movie ended, we spent an hour resting and preparing in another fancy lounge. When we got dumped back into the real world, no time had passed. I quickly selected the rest of the party, including Nigel, and used another Party Time Token to whisk them all into a movie. This time I selected randomly and ended up with The Man From Uncle.
Great movie. Badly underrated. The opening scene where Henry Cavill walks into East Germany wasn’t the most uplifting scene for our discussion, but we could have gotten something worse, like some valium-paced, sleep-inducing flick.
I quickly outlined the plan, shared Road Runner potions with each of them, and summoned Switchblade for Jane. She grinned fiercely as she pulled the goggles over her eyes.
“Should we let them run when they break under the onslaught we’re about to unleash, or keep hitting them?”
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” Her boundless spirit helped buoy my own nerves.
“I admit, I was getting a bit freaked out seeing an entire army with laser rifles coming at us,” Hector said, although he didn’t look freaked out. The olive-skinned older gentleman looked calm and prepared for battle. “Now that we have a plan, I agree with Jane. They will rue the day they chose to attack us.”
“That’s the spirit.” I shared a scroll of Earth Armor with him, just as I had with Sally. They’d be the most exposed of the melee fighters.
“It will take a lot of steak to get the taste of so many zombies out of my mouth,” Nigel said.
I scratched behind his hears. “As many as you can eat.”
“Really?” he perked up and suddenly I worried I might not have enough.
Reviewing the plan and brainstorming last-minute adjustments took up more than half of the movie. Then we just had to wait. My thoughts kept wandering as I stewed over the best ways to take on Noctarus. His evolved form looked extremely powerful. Even if he didn’t have other surprises up his clawed franken-sleeves, dealing with him would be tough.
Jane flew over to join me during the evening scene in Rome. Gesturing at the Spanish Steps the characters were discussing, she said, “Tomas and I talked about going to Rome, but never did. Always figured we had tons of time.”
“You can go when we get back to Earth.”
She leveled a serious gaze at me. “Just make sure you get back to Midmount Vale. We’ll figure out how to get home eventually.”
I lifted a fist for her to bump. “Give them hell.”
She grinned, her eyes flashing with Phoenix power. “I’m going to have a blast tonight. It’s you who’ll have to take a beating.”
“I’ve got a plan.”
She snorted. “Not inspiring confidence, Lucas. Your plans seem to end up with you getting eaten or beaten to a pulp before killing the monsters. Try something different.”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
All too soon, we were dumped back into the real world, standing on the banks of a sleep-spelled lake, surrounded by billowing fog, with an army of zombies charging right at us. Only 2 seconds had passed for them, but we’d all had 3 hours to prepare. Double that for me.
As one, we exploded into action. Ruby started throwing out energy barriers while Sally activated the shimmering white dome of their defensive array. Burns sent updates to Tony while slinging lightning bolts, and Steve and half a dozen of his clones spread out and unleashed a barrage of elemental-infused arrows into the distant horde.
Robin leaped skyward, disappearing into the fog before hurling a rain of fiery missiles that detonated with wonderful ferocity into the midst of the horde. Hector drew his swords and waited patiently for the zombies to approach, while Nigel swelled to full size and crouched, a low steady growl setting his entire body shaking.
Tomas and Jerry appeared in the air above Noctarus’s distant form, a hazy, dangerous shape looming at the edges of our vision through the fog. They returned a split second later, just as I cast Potential Hammer, setting it right in front of where Noctarus stood.
The giant monster wasn’t moving fast, and I expected a lot of fighting to happen there. I read a scroll of Earth Armor to boost my defense and equipped my Crash Test Dummy jacket and Phantomstep Breeches. The 6 hours in the movie had allowed the equipment to keep repairing.
Did that mean the movie was actually some kind of time-dilated pocket dimension? Made sense since we all interacted in it. Either way, getting ongoing healing and repair was a huge bonus. We could even retreat back in there to regroup if needed. My jacket wasn’t at 100% yet, but it was close enough and I needed its impact protection. Then I triggered Energy Ward along with Elemental Harmony to add ice and fire effects from potions.
A series of grenades detonated under Noctarus’s leviathan, ringing the monster in crimson flames, white divine power, and eerie gray smoke. The last seemed to come from the Ages Past potion. A network of complex runes lit up across the monster’s body, as expected, and it seemed unaffected by the attack. Better yet, neither Tomas nor Jerry suffered any backlash.
Jerry cursed. “I can’t believe they didn’t do anything.”
“Hopefully it took a chunk out of the rune’s power. You two, hit it with more grenades between my strikes as often as you can. Let’s go.”
“Good luck!” Ruby shouted, then turned and started lobbing a mixture of acid grenades, lava grenades, and fiery immolation grenades from the launcher she cradled in one hand. With the other, she launched a steady rain of potions over the zombie army.
She’d done a lot of trading in town and had accumulated a vast array of offensive potions. Waves of different elements, detonations of pure force, and flashes of brilliant divine energy swept across the leading elements of the zombie forces.
The sight of her standing behind the glowing energy barriers, dressed in her battle ranger outfit, hair blowing behind her from the gusting wind, dual-wielding grenade launchers was awesome. If only I had a camera to capture the moment.
Tomas rapidly blinked across the space about 100 feet in front of our defensive bulwark, moving from left to right, dropping constructs he’d built. They looked like octagonal pillars coated in some of the crystals that had sheathed the drake dungeon, and they started spinning as soon as they appeared.
“What are those?” I asked when Tomas appeared right next to me.
“Deflection towers. Those energy rifles are the biggest threat, at least at first. They’ll deflect incoming laser blasts back against the zombie army.”
“Sweet.” Clever thinking.
“I’ve got some different ones for when the zombies get closer. Let’s go.” Tomas grabbed my arm and together we blinked away, landing 20 feet from the leviathan.
I charged, my Titanbreaker ax dropping into my left hand, Earthshaker Maul in my right. The disgusting skull heads on their serpentine necks swiveled toward me from both ends of the monstrosity and Noctarus’s voice echoed out from one of them.
“Give me my crystal!”
His voice boomed like thunder, and up close, the freakish leviathan was even bigger and more disgusting. I considered hitting him with Mana Desert again, but what if his rune barrier was another tier-1 prize he’d taken from his homeworld? If so, I’d end up in a fatally weakened state. I couldn’t afford to take the risk.
So, to quote a necromancer I needed to kill, I had to do it the hard way. I accelerated into a sprint, drawing deep from my Alpha-enhanced Agility and the double-boosted speed from the Road Runner potion. I crossed the 20 feet in a blink and slammed both weapons into the side of the monster that was literally as big as a barn.
With my Strength doubled again by my ax and the 3000 pound weight of the maul, I hit the leviathan with the force of an exploding volcano. Runes blazed to light at the impact points and a mind-boggling force punched me across my entire body from the rebound effect.
Green foam exploded out in a sticky wave as the brutal impact triggered the Death Catcher mini waffle defense. Even with it, the impact still felt like I’d tried catching a runaway truck with my face and I catapulted away, hurtling backward like a cannonball. My entire torso creaked as my jacket spread the massive amounts of force all around to lessen the impact point. It felt like a giant was trying to squeeze me into jelly.
“One down,” I muttered, spitting a mouthful of blood. My Tesla Coil bracelet was pouring restorative power into me, but for a moment I hurt all over.
Energy Ward started shuddering as I blasted through ranks of zombies, deflecting them aside and draining some of their energy. Barely slowing, I hurtled through the zombie army, knocking dozens of zombies off their feet. Cool. I swept my weapons out to the sides, crushing more zombie bodies. I also summoned another Death Catcher waffle and affixed it to my foamy jacket.
First strike down. Noctarus was big and no doubt insanely strong, but also seemed rather slow. Good for us. If he’d gotten a titanic fighting body with super speed too, we’d be toast. I had a few of the mini waffles left. Would they run out first, or would Noctarus’s rune shield crack?
That was the million dollar question. Our lives might very well hang in the balance.
By the time I punched a hole deep into the flank of the zombie army, my momentum finally started slowing. Some of them were starting to shoot at me, but so far Energy Ward managed to deflect the blasts. I dropped a pair of acid and lava grenades, cast Knock Knock on top of them to hopefully distract some of the zombies for a moment, then triggered Shadow Walk.
The world lit up in my mind as all the crazy dancing shadows across the battlefield called to me. I picked one on the opposite side of the leviathan and stepped through shadow. I appeared 10 feet behind the leviathan, still flying pretty fast, just as more grenades detonated under and around it.
The blasts rattled me, but I had enough momentum to sail through. I hit the ground running, accelerating even faster, and with all my strength, I slammed my weapons into his other side.
I didn’t have quite as much momentum as last time, but still packed a mighty punch. Again the rebound force clubbed me like one of the Colossus’s fists. My second Death Catcher waffle detonated, absorbing some of the impact, and again I was sent careening away, this time along the shores of the lake toward the distant ships.
I activated Spellseer’s Gaze again, and the world lit up in living color. Flying away from the battlefield, I got a panoramic view of the fight. Spells and grenades and energy beams lit the night in a crazy strobe of brilliant flashes. The team were fully engaged, unleashing a cascading torrent of spells and attacks that were decimating the front ranks of the zombie army.
If there weren’t so many of them, we’d crush them all, but with several hundred more zombies still pouring out of the castle, we’d run out of grenades, exhaust our mana pools, and wear down our strength long before we ran out of enemies.
It wasn’t hopeless, though. All I needed to do was stop Noctarus. If I could kill the leviathan, the zombies would break. Maybe. So I focused on the monsters.
I affixed another Death Catcher mini waffle magical airbag, then Shadow Walked again, appearing on the opposite side of Noctarus again to take advantage of my momentum and raced in. The closest head oriented on me and he hissed in anger.
“Lucas, this foolishness is useless. All I want is the crystal. I’m willing to make a trade.”
“Call of your hordes and we can talk.”
“You are in no position to set terms, child. You—“
I interrupted before he could start monologueing, slamming my heavy weapons into his side. Third time wasn’t the charm. Another brutal impact triggered the waffle defense and catapulted me away.
Noctarus kept talking, his voice booming over the battlefield. “Your foolish obstinacy will get your team killed.”
Waves of black magic roiled around Noctarus and his other disgusting skull pivoted toward my distant team. A beam of pure blackness shot out of his empty eye sockets and punched through space in a single heartbeat before slamming into Hector’s chest. It ignored his Earth Armor completely.
The duelist staggered, clutching at his heart, one sword dropping from his hand. His face paled and he dropped to one knee.
“No!” I shouted, still sailing away at insane speed, and only barely resisted the urge to Shadow Walk over to him. I had the most important mission to do. I couldn’t allow myself to get distracted.
Burns rushed from the defensive barrier. Lightning ripped open the night sky, blasting the zombies nearest to Hector and blinding more. Burns scooped up the injured warrior and even snatched up his sword before sprinting back behind cover.
Jane roared in from the other side, Switchblade surrounded by a tornado of flames and crackling chain lightning. She ripped through the leading elements of the zombie horde, driving them back long enough for Burns to make it back under cover. Four of Steve’s clones also stepped outside of the protective barriers and hurled a dozen molotov cocktails in rapid succession, raining a cascading firestorm across one side of the zombie army.
Through the shimmering haze of the energy barriers, Ruby was already crouching over Hector. Meanwhile, Tomas and Jerry blinked rapidly through the zombie horde, sowing destruction and havoc. Jerry dropped acid, lava, and divine grenades, while Tomas slashed apart zombies with his blessed sword.
He also triggered his zombie joke book over and over, distracting zombies with bouts of insane laughter while he slashed them apart. Every 3rd jump, he dropped off another slapdash construct too. Most were built like A-frames with a dozen long, wooden arms, capped with scraps of steel like makeshift swords. They each tore through a bunch of zombies like out-of-control threshing machines before getting smashed apart.
I had a good team. They knew what to do. I could count on them. Focusing on Noctarus again, I condense all my rage into a white-hot intensity and once more triggered Shadow Walk.
This time I appeared 30 feet in front of Noctarus and instantly cast Mana Beam, mixing in 3 potions of Stygian Ichor. I’d saved Mana Beam for Noctarus, and despite the chance that his rune barrier would block it, I still had to try.
The blue beam of dense magic appeared, streaked with black as it crossed the distance and engulfed Noctarus’s skull head. The rune matrix lit up again, but either the rebound didn’t affect the spell as much, or the Mana Beam sucked out enough of its power because the spell didn’t snuff out instantly.
Noctarus’s skeletal head reared back, trying to escape the brutal mana-killing beam, but it followed.
His other head bellowed, “Stop, you fool! I have proven I can injure your people. Do you want them all to die for your vanity?”
“No. Just you.”
I sprinted in and slammed both of my weapons into the center of his chest with all my Strength.
Again the defensive runes flared and again a crushing force blasted me away, as if a giant invisible Babe Ruth hit me with his best home run. Yet another Death Catcher waffle exploded in blue foam, saving me a lot of damage, but the brutal strike still crashed over me. Bones cracked and my insides felt like they were getting jellified.
I spat another mouthful of blood. “Ow.”
Maybe I should have also bought Rundak's Crushing Mace after all. The added direct spiritual damage might have helped, but that Unstoppable Force ability would have really come in handy with becoming immune to knockback for one big hit.
Back to doing it the hard way.
Noctarus called after me, “Fine. I’ll regain my crystal when I loot your corpse. No more restraint.”
He called that restraint? I blasted back so far through the air that I shot out over the glowing green lake. Crap, I’d been so mad, I hadn’t realized the rebound would shoot me into the dangerous sleep-inducing light. Instantly a sense of lethargy spread over me.
No no no, I couldn’t fall asleep now. I activated my Indomitable aura to boost my mental defense and cast Tether Slide. A golden chain shot out, connecting to the center of Noctarus’s chest and I groaned from the massive G forces as my hurtling speed suddenly reversed and Tether Slide yanked me in the other direction.
Even with my elevated stats, my body felt on the verge of simply snapping in half from the immense strain, despite the ongoing healing from my Tesla Coil bracelet. But it worked, and I left the deadly sleepiness of the lake. The intense pull yanked Noctarus’s leviathan stumbling forward a few steps too.
As I hurtled in at Noctarus again, he focused on me through the ongoing haze of my mana death beam. It wasn’t hurting him yet, but had to be helping wear down his rune defense. He shot another death beam at me.
I couldn’t dodge, so pushed my mana in front of me in another shield. His necromancy beam struck and burst through, severely weakened, but it still plunged into my chest and struck my heart.
Searing pain lanced through me and I gasped as his dark power tore into my mana pool, trying to disrupt it. I sensed evil magic trying to spread, but it flickered and winked out. It must be some kind of zombie poison, but I was immune to poison and my convergence mana was far more durable than his death-attuned mana. His evil power still shook me, but I was able to withstand the assault and it really pissed me off.
He reared back as I hurtled in, swiping at me with his poison-tipped deadly clawed hands. I triggered the Implacable upgrade to Tether Slide and my speed doubled over the last hundred feet. That helped me slip through unscathed to slam both weapons into the center of his chest again with all my strength, shouting with the effort.
His defensive rune barrier flared yet again, but this time a thunderous crack sounded and the flash winked out. Enough rebound force struck that it would normally knock me stumbling. It definitely shook me, but rolled past without knocking me back as Earthshaker Maul’s unshakable footing kicked in.
Yes! I’d cracked the rebound force. Runes still coated his entire gigantic body, but I’d broken through the first layer of defense.
“First step’s always the hardest,” I growled and spat a mouth full of blood.
