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Cunk On Britain - S1 E4

🕑 Added 2025-01-19 13:00:08 +0000 UTC

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Mandy Cane Lane

How peaceful life without mosquitos must be! WELC9ME BACK 🙌🏻

Josh

dont think mosquitos exist here, YES IM BACK 😁

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

😅😅😅

.

My missus has left me, Steve, and she claims it is over my bizarre obsession with pasta. I admit I've been feeling cannelloni lately.

Carl-Fredrik L

As Ive understood it, midges are a type of fly. Like sand- and blackflies. There are 35 different species of biting midges in Scotland

Joshyboiiiiii

Well I've managed to fraud an interview for next Thursday

.

The first time, definitely creepy, it makes it feel infested. But it's probably like 20 or so little guys that got to play in the whole fields for a week without it being disrupted.

Mandy Cane Lane

The "female - ____- men was hilarious 🤣🤣. Midges sound the same but smaller 😭

Mandy Cane Lane

Oh my, that took a turn 😅. No worries Josh! You do you and best of luck to the change!

Mandy Cane Lane

HAHAHAHAHA! KENNY IS RE-PAINTING ITTTTTT!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

BAHAHHAHAHAH! Very informative, thank you!! 🤣🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

That sounds wonderful 🥹

Mandy Cane Lane

The lil' rammstein girl is awesome! So happy you are Ok Steve, and Furby was adorable 💚

irreverend

No no, I mean /probably/ but there is a reasonable chance those pigeons are still alive. But you know, everything dies eventually. But don't feel bad about those pigeons, London pigeons get the best scraps and food. Regarding fidget cubes I'd be happy to print some and send them to a PO box.

Mandy Cane Lane

"Met a mosquito", haha! Love it!! 🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

I agree with Julian! Have heard both!

Mandy Cane Lane

"Wee beastie" is adorable 🤣. And midges sound awful. I mean, do we need 'em?

Remi

Because if you eat it with alcohol you'll die 👍🏻

Mandy Cane Lane

It is amazing to me that mosquitoes aren't an issue over there! 😅

Mandy Cane Lane

Lmao! I have no problem with worms 🪱🤪

Mandy Cane Lane

HAHAHHAHA! This cracked me up 🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

Ahh ok! Thank you! Exactly like a SUBE card. Why is it called Oyster though? 🤔

Mandy Cane Lane

Pidgeons = dead, got it 😭. Lol, glad you enjoy Cunk Irreverend! I think these are so fun! Not sure if my fan is good enough to do that, and I would freakin' LOVE a fidget cube! Gonna look into those!

Steve with a beard

Omg! And no need to reply to this, I just rememberd and wanted you to know that you're not alone with the seeing RIP pigeons haha. If I watch a film from the 90s and see an elderly extra in the background I'll think "damn...😐". Not all the time, but it does happen, and with seeing animals too - as you said haha. Not important, but high five to being normal 😂

Mandy Cane Lane

And it is to my understanding Mr 44 that orthodontics is only braces and the straightening of teeth. Everything else is dentistry 🤗

Mandy Cane Lane

Hahaha, well must be nice to not have mosquitos!

Mandy Cane Lane

Haha! You know? I almost did that one myself 🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

OH YEAHHHH!!! Forgot about the NFTs! That was ridiculous! And yes. Parents lies that stick too long is most definitely a thing! Hahhaa! Also the spider silk on the grass - pretty? Yes. Horrible? Also yes! 🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

Regarding the mosquitos in the grass, it would stand to reason (since it rains so much) that water stay stagnant in the grass and gives them a great place to spawn. Lol. And yes, those pidgeons are indeed now famous! 🤣

Josh Read

It's a seal of approval not a stamp. There is a world of difference 🤗

Mandy Cane Lane

HAHAHSHHSHAHHAHA! HEY! How dare you use my face as a stamp of approval I haven't given! Lol 🤣🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

"A minute shorter" Hahahha!! 🤣🤣🤣 So glad you liked it Steve! These are great fun!

Mandy Cane Lane

No mosquitos? What a blessing! Not too keen on the other stuff, but at least they don't bite (usually) 😅

Mandy Cane Lane

🤣🤣

Mandy Cane Lane

Ohhh, Lol 🤣

Superclarky666

King edwards is also a type of potato

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

https://www.instagram.com/p/DFJUVL8PBuS/ 😁

Maik Kellerhals

...and some spiders. (friendly too, but i don't like them)

Maik Kellerhals

...but they're friendly

Maik Kellerhals

No mosquitoes in the grass here (Switzerland). But thousands of Grasshoppers

Joshyboiiiiii

If it's bleeding you might have a problem

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

When I came out it was in the 160's. I go to the Doctor on Thursday to see what's what, and also to get results from an echocardiogram I had.

Josh Read

Bloody he'll that is high. What has it gone down to??

Jeffrey44

Can I call you about my rectum?

Steve with a beard

This episode was amazing haha, I loved the reaction too - particularly to the erotic Winton Churchill speech and the Radio 4 figures 😂 I've nothing greatly against Robert Peston, but he was on the news tonight, as a correspondent, about Trump's inauguration. The way he was talking and draaaagging out every other word and pausing was so frustrating 😂 It could have been at least a minute shorter haha. Anyway, great stuff Mandy, loved it! 😁👍🏻

Joshyboiiiiii

Nhs call centre inbound calls stuff

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

I am indeed Josh, thanks. Just until I get my blood pressure under control. It's a bit of trial and error with the dosage, when I got to the hospital last Monday it was over 200. I will get there.

Josh Read

Are you taking things easy now you are out of hospital? Bet you are pleased to be home again 🙂

Benjamin Taylor-Yates

May as well be, they're just as annoying.

irreverend

Midges aren't mosquitoes, just saying

Josh Read

Awww look how happy she looks 🤗🤗🤗

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

https://iili.io/2i2M679.png

Josh Read

https://youtu.be/GpI0H_NB-Do?si=0zl_W2Kb1bSn7DTX This was the earliest I could find, there were just a few episodes. Enjoy 😉 I won't be watching it myself but I'm looking forward to your reaction 🙌

irreverend

Especially the part where it suddenly changes into a diary. It's very much why V for Vendetta is clearly influenced by it, and more significantly than other things based upon it.

irreverend

At dot? @. Listening to the audiobook counts. Watching the original film or any doesn't quite count but it's better than just saying you read it because you've seen things or understood the concepts the book is known for, without actually understanding the nuances of it

Stevus

It has paragraphs, they're just invisible.

Jeffrey44

Edit this post. Put some paragraphs in. It's not too late.

Stevus

Almost forgot, there's also this! https://youtu.be/kXtq7KVi5SM?si=BR7JqWEtYxDnjHoO

Stevus

That was very informative... oh, wait 🤔 never mind. With regards to mozzies, as a few others will comment, there are things that live amongst the grass, but mozzies generally aint one of them, unless there is stagnant water around. That's really the key with mozzies. The stagnant water. Interestingly, imo anyway, the reason councils etc. put fountains in water features in public spaces is not for aesthetic purposes, although i'm sure that's a consideration, but simply to prevent mozzies from breeding in them. You probably have some bodies of water around there somewhere that lie stagnant at certain times of the year that cause a massive increase in the mozzie population temporarily. It only takes someone with a neglected pond or container of water sitting around, or even a rainwater tank to increase the numbers locally. I leave buckets out to collect rainwater off the roof and if I don't use it quickly, they inevitably end up with mozzie larvae in them. Regarding Brushstrokes, I know my brother used to watch it a lot, but I don't know why they keep referencing it in this. I'd guess it's some in joke with the writers or something. And I need to check, because I'm not sure I was hearing it right. The pigeons on the statue, did you say "those pigeons must be famous"? Other than all that nonsense, Thanks 🤗 until next time 🫡

.

I know you said you have forgotten so this is not a question as such but I wonder; does listening to the audio book or even having seen the movie count as having read it? I would probably claim i'd read something if I'd listened to it, although I hadn't literally read it.

Jeffrey44

To be clear, I don't actually know that either.

.

Oh I've got one for you maybe dumber than the fidget spinner things and disappeared faster too - the NFT fad.

.

When I was little my dad once advised me not to go walking in to long grass (like, knee high) because it was full of hidden grass snakes and it stuck with me for ages. Didn't prevent me much, but I remember I was always worried about being bitten by a camouflaged snake out of the blue . 😐I was probably in my early teens by the time I worked that one out. 😅 So I empathize with Karl sometimes (reads; often). Because I think some of Karl's "true" stories are things like this that he heard once when he was about 6 or 7 and hasn't thought to question it since. Just unfortunate for him when he happens to remember it live on the radio. We must all have had things like that we forgot about until it's too late, right? Please say it's not just a me and Karl thing. 🥺😆

.

Nothing too nasty in our fields. Maybe the odd leech or tick in the wild grass? Bees or wasps and ants might annoy you if you're sitting with friends in a park. There was a worm we called a blood-sucker but I'm questioning myself as to whether they are even real now. We do have harmless spiders in them too with the other general creepy crawlies. Back in school after a half term break, if we had PE for first lesson we'd go outside and could see all of the spider silks stretching across the fields glistening in the morning dew. Was very pretty like fairy dust sparkling.

.

It's hard to tell how long pigeons live for 'cause you never see a baby pigeon.

irreverend

@Jeffrey44 awww, well I didn't know that, but I'm sure you've destroyed all hope Mandy had now :) I jest, it's safe to assume they were probably dead even if it was recorded in 2018 but I thought I'd try to put a positive light on it :P

Jeffrey44

That footage of Queen Victoria's statue with the pigeons was stock footage from 2007. Those pigeons are not only dead now, they were also dead by time this episode was broadcast. They only achieved posthumous fame like Vincent van Gogh (or Van Gogh as an American would say).

Jeffrey44

Americans don't have dentistry. They have orthodontics.

Rusty Dog

She does a philomenal job even 😁

BobSandwiches

Except in Glasgow, after the pubs close. They can get pretty vicious then; especially if you are English and they think you are giving them a funny look...

irreverend

I think the reason for the phrasing "Festivals of hatred" there is because as a result of racism towards people from the Caribbean, London now has the Notting Hill Carnival every year.

irreverend

An interesting thing about George Orwell's 1984, I've forgotten the actual statistic, but a very significant number of people who claim to have read it, haven't.

irreverend

"Twatted" in that context means hit very hard. If you twat someone it means you've punched them. It's probably a more Northern colloquialism, so they might not say it much down south, but they would understand still.

irreverend

I don't know if it's still a thing in school playgrounds these days, but from the 40s and definitely into the early 90s (when I was still in primary school), singing that song about Hitler only having one testicle was still a thing.

irreverend

The circular target looking things on British planes are called Roundels, they were a way to identify friendly aircraft in the sky. I think in WW1 they were only on the bottom of the planes, since I don't think plane to plane fighting was a thing then, so others in the air didn't need to be able to identify friendly aircraft. It seems the British air forces got the idea from the French in WW1. In WW2 obviously we changed where the "targets" were so others in the sky could tell :)

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

Oh, by the way, Mandy, the cat in my picture is a little cat I used to have called Furby. She was similar to Kitana in that she was tiny. She looked bigger because she was very flooffy, but if she got caught in the rain, she'd come home looking a quarter of the size she left. 😸https://iili.io/2PZn76v.jpg

BobSandwiches

"and eyes" means spectacles... Dentistry and glasses (or, eye-glasses as an Amer . . . Oh BUGGER - he's got me doing it now! [breathes out slowly] ) . . . were considered separate from general medicine. Mozzies are not a thing in the UK generally - you occasionally get some blown over from France and they set up shop in the South East, but they generally die out in a year or three. It's too cold for 'em. But for some reason, the rain and cold does not stop the (tiny, tiny, wee) midges in Scotland... Seems mosquitoes are a bunch of wimps.

AWR93

An Oyster card is a smart card that you add money to, so you can pay as you go. It’s mainly used for Bus or Train/Underground in London. https://ibb.co/MNqPhVC There’s also a kids Oyster card which allows children up to 16 years old, to travel for free!

irreverend

You need a fidget cube! Possibly anyway. Having been into 3D printing for the past 8 years I've seen a lot of designs for things like that, little clicky toggle buttons on one side, other things on other sides etc. I'll admit I didn't really see why something which spins would necessarily help with ADHD or stimming, but a satisfying click toggle button and suchlike, yeah, might be calming.

irreverend

King Edward is a breed of potato, like Maris Piper etc

irreverend

UK wild pigeon average life expectancy is 3 to 5 years but they can live up to 15 apparently. They probably are dead, however I think Cunk on Britain was 2018? So they may still be knocking about

irreverend

If it's a well designed fan, it should be cooling it's own motor with the air flow? It ought to be fine :)

irreverend

I live up in the Lake District and I do recall as a child what we'd call bloodsuckers, I guess they were mosquitoes. They're not that common, but I definitely had one on me once and I was told to just leave it until it was done. Midges (also called gnats elsewhere in the world I think) have never bothered me, I didn't realise they bite. I was born in Scotland and visited there a lot too, the Scottish midges leave me alone as well. Regularly walked through clouds of them when I was younger and I thought the biggest problem with them was accidentally inhaling them :) EDIT: Also London is a pretty built up area, maybe the few mosquitoes we do have in the UK don't like London?

irreverend

Oooh yay more Cunk \o/

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

Cheers, Benji, I appreciate it. Also, Jeffrey, I will be paying the store a visit. I know a few of the staff because they use the taxi firm I work for, so I will be thanking them for their help. Mr. T, those drinks sound good! I mean, they used to give pregnant women Guinness in hospitals, so I say why not? 😅

Remi

An Oyster card is the London/English equivalent of the SUBE card

Remi

Can't wait for you to see the other series's of Cunk because they are fucking gold, I live in the Welsh countryside and I think I've only ever seen one mosquito back in 2022 when we had a heatwave, but I'm not a biologist so realistically it could have been anything

Julian T

The green grass in Scotland is only infested with worms, which do not attack

Julian T

Sounds like a business opportunity. You could serve a Morphine Margarita or a Benzodiazepine Bloody Mary. The hospital would save money on anaesthetics, everyone would be passed out already.

AWR93

Heavy topics in this episode but as always, hilarious delivery from Ms Cunk 😂 Also, yeah I’m from London and can confirm that I’ve never seen a mosquito in my 31 years. It’s those damn flying ants you need to watch out for in the summer, especially in or around parks/rivers! That call of duty bit was too funny 🤣

Julian T

I’ve always thought that both would be valid. I’ve definitely used both, and heard both being used, so no idea which one is more prevalent.

Benjamin Taylor-Yates

Oh, I've not kept up with this, sounds like quite a story. Hope you're all okay Steve mate. 👍

Benjamin Taylor-Yates

Not to worry mate, best of luck to you. I'm about to start out a new job on the coaches. My schedules gonna get turned upside down, but it should be a bit more cash (much as Mr taxman will try to stop that). Plus Mandy's got house stuff on too so we're all busy. 🤗

Yoshua Simoleit

The midges in the Scottish Highlands definitely do bite a lot!

Yoshua Simoleit

I can tell you the green green grass is not that infested with mosqitoes. It's not too bad. In the Scottish Highlands though, at certain times of the year near water sources, there are tiny flying biting bastards called midges. There can be many thousands of them and the bites are very itchy. In Scotland, any small creature is often referred to as a 'wee beastie' which I love, but those particular wee beasties are truly wee bastards.

Jeffrey44

Back out in society, one testicle lighter and a handful of strong drugs to force down each day. It's going to be tough but I'm glad to hear you have the opportunity to return to Tesco to apologise and pay for any damages.

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

Hi Jeffrey, they released me back into society this morning, thank God. Did you know they don’t have licensed bars in hospitals? They don’t, I checked. 😅

Jeffrey44

Are you still in the Welfare State, Steve?

Jeffrey44

Cunk on Britain is a humorous series that shouldn't be taken 100% seriously, that's a given. However, sometimes it also features truth amongst the laughs. In this particular episode, historian Ashley Jackson refers to World War 2 but then goes on to say something like "Or the Second World War as an American would say" (see 26:22). Is this true? Do Americans call World War II, the Second World War?

lemmy

I've lived in the UK for my whole life and am old and I don't think I've ever knowingly met a mosquito - apparently we have them but they aren't a part of our life generally compared to warmer climates. We have midges though, which are our 'annoying flying thing that can bite you' in an evening in summer, but i think they are generally smaller and far less bother than mosquitos and rarely bite. More just a cloud of annoying tiny flies.

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

DO HAVE FISH! https://www.instagram.com/p/DFAuxvMPRND/ 🤣

𝑭𝒆𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒚 𝑺𝒕𝒆𝒗𝒆

That was terrific Mandy, thank you. 🤗🤗

JokerDanny

No the grass in the UK is mosquito free, well at least in the north, don't know about the south where it's warmer.

Carl-Fredrik L

😆

Carl-Fredrik L

Whaaaaat!?!

Tony Mingoia

Just to be clear for Mandy, a variety of potato. Not an individual potato that we singled out for exaltation.

Carl-Fredrik L

There is a potato called King Edward.

Jeffrey44

What line of business are you looking to get in to, Josh?

Josh Read

Brilliant 🙌🙌🙌 No our grass isn't normally infested with mosquitos. A king Edward is a type of potato. Cunk has come out with some very silly stuff. Yet even she knows that young Kenny is unable to get the face paint off and that he doesn't wear it by choice. It's certainly nice to see you enjoy a show where you are not sickened, shocked or appalled just happy 😊

Joshyboiiiiii

Sorry for hardly being here this year so far, been really busy on a course hopefully making a career change so I'll probably not be first much

Benjamin Taylor-Yates

🥇 And nah, Mosquitos are very docile here. We have small mosquito like bugs called midges that gather near water like ditches, ponds and rivers and move across fields at sunset and sunrise. But no, the grass is mostly prone to Beetles, worms, ants and spiders. We don't really have any poisenous or venomous wildlife besides one type of rare snake, some ticks and bees/wasps. "Female-bus-driver-men." 🤣 That one got me. There's a few Alpha females in our depot, let me tell you. Tis amazing how much can happen in one century. All the things we take for granted now.