Friend Me First, Bro 😎

LittleMago

Same here Teacup, that's why i'm feeling like i have no place in the society :/ but i'm fine with kt, maybe i will fined someone someday ❤️

Gustavo Meras

Good to know it's not just me who's constantly thinking that.

Richard Hardslab

Oh man, I totally feel this one. While I would rather to naturally slide into things, I've fallen into the mental habit that the girl is going to ask 'me' out. Hasn't happened yet and I'm at the point I need to not rely on that idea. My hobbies are pretty solitary too, which means I need an alternative plan.

Mike Taylor

Yeah, I prefer sort of naturally sliding into things versus the various ways people set up dates. That was how my relationship with my boy's mom happened (the fact that it didn't go as planned is another story) and it's how my brother and his now wife got together.

Minos

I understand the sentiment, but sometimes it's important to take the plunge. You may find that you like things more than you thought! Also some people have the (reasonable) expectation that a relationship may eventually lead to a family, and waiting four years to initiate contact might be quite an ask depending on where the individuals are in their life. I'm not saying your wrong to feel the way you do, but I am saying that the world wasn't made by people living in a constant state of comfort <3 take care of yourself, Tea.

Phoenix Brave Hideki

Once again Tea is spilling some truth. I have to agree first befriend for some years then we can talk about dating.

I've always had this feeling as well. Both relationships I've had in my life started as friendships where I enjoyed the other person's company and felt comfortable with them. I've tried doing the "date a stranger you don't know and try to figure out if you actually want to be around them or not" and it has never gone well, at least for me. I'm sure it works sometimes but good lord it's unpleasant to start that way. Dating is hard enough when it's someone you already know some things about!

phoenix

Hard agree. I've tried it the other way around and it just never works out!

bodaciousboii

I’ve always thought that was a good idea, but today’s culture seems to be one in which you date first and figure if ur compatible in two-three meetings. I’ve always hated doing it because your setting yourself up for failure down the line by doing it like that. And the expectation to get to the level of intimacy after the third meeting is also bizarre to me.

I'd love to agree, but I've never had luck with friends to lovers situations. It's never been reciprocated for me which has turned me off the whole idea for good. It's probably just me though. :/

Yup, unless i already feel comfortable around someone i'm just not interested in looking at them romantically.

Funflame

The holding hand if you feel slutty enough hits home for me 😅 Using a label for this would be demi-sexual/romantic, (of which I am both). Just knowing a person enough to decided they are your person to attempt things with (like how people describe the choice of marraige but for the 'first step'. How I see it!) Though I have jumped in early a lot only to be burned cause of it 😭

Seth JayArch

Yes but I also hate meeting new people on my own. I just feel awkward