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Bella's Tantrum Layout/Dialog/Inner Thoughts?

🕑 Added 2019-03-12 18:12:37 +0000 UTC

Comments

capone justice

I love that Maggie gets to fuck Mary, I have been waiting for that in each episode!

I like get down to business lol but either way is up to you i don't mind

bigwiggy

I love the fact that not a single person has said the Anna bonus scene is a dumb idea so I think it's safe to say people really want to see Anna. Personally I'd say do both bonus ideas as they're both good as the first serves as an intro for Anna, plus their both funny. Just an idea but I'd have Anna appear just as Bella starts cumming and have their eyes meet with Bella having a "deer in the headlights" look as she's been caught jizzing all over the family dinner.

Red girl fan

Can't wait i bet that chicken would be good lol

glrider

First inner thought. Tantrum thoughts should always be about "I" "I want this." "I don't want that." type statements. So maybe it should be something like "I wanted to fuck Maggie in the ass." or "I wanted to Maggie to suck my dick." Regarding bonus scenes. Do them.. if and only if they serve a purpose, if they set up something later.

Kennyannydenny

So my answers were: Anna bonus scene is a must, the alternative ending sounds delicious, and Bella is so cute :D I really love Bella, glad to see more of her.

Ciarán M

Ah, I understand and I agree with you about not wanting too much dialogue bogging things down. I think that making that change to Bella saying Mary is good enough since in scene 2 you have Bella remarking about how they dont want to play with her anymore. So it follows that we hear Bella worry about Mary fuckong Maggie and then in scene 2 we get a hint at the reason why Bella would be worried about that, that concern about being left behind. It'll be interesting to see how the scene cuts back and forth between Mary/Maggie and Bella and seeing the latter's growing concerns alongside all the naughty stuff going on in thenother room. I also like that you plan to have both Bella and Maggie's cumshots happen close to each other in the video timeline.

Agent Red Girl

Heya Ciaran! Yeah all 3 of these would be happening... there would be little cuts from Mary and Maggie to show Bellas thought progression. And she is hoping that Mary isnt fucking Maggie in the ass... the reason is, Mary has fucked Bella in the ass a LOT so Bella is worried that Mary will enjoy Maggies ass more because its... less used? =P But I didnt want to put in a ton of dialog to explain that. I could make it say "I hope Mary isnt fucking her ass..." instead though.

marvin

dirty talk is always good

Ciarán M

So all 3 instances of dialogue here are going to happen? This is the progression of the scene, I mean? Just making sure i understand, I can be pretty dense sometimes 😅. I do like your idea of giving Bella a bit of a "potty mouth" as a fun quirk and yes, I definitely remember that moment in AML3 😉😻. Having her swearing here sounds like a fun call back to that scene. In the scene 1 when Bella says "I hope she isn't fucking her ass", who is she specifically referring to? Is she worried about Maggie fucking Mary or the other way around? Maybe I'm being dense again 😅, but I think it would still work fine if she said the name like "I hope Maggie isn't fucking her ass" or Mary if it's the other way around. I do like the idea though, showing Bella's insecurities here. Scene 2 sounds good too, no issues with her dialogue and I enjoy the the idea of her with this mischievous grin 😈. The description for Scene 3 sounds so sexy and I will definitely be eager to see previews of that! Also "various orgasm sounds" is a beautiful description 😹 I definitely think having Anna walk in on Bella is a great idea, like you say, it foreshadows her appearance in AML5 and it's kind of a fun parallel with AML2 where it was Bella who discovered some naughty happenings 😉. Though Anna clearly isnt feeling the same way about this 😹. Hmm, I do enjoy the idea of the alternate ending and it could end up being quite funny 😹. 3-5 days more wouldn't be the worst thing ever either and I think I could deal with that extra waiting. Hope this feedback helps 😸 and I'm looking forward to the next preview.


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