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🕑 Added 2024-02-04 06:00:04 +0000 UTC

Comments

SenescentSoul

Woah, yeah, he forgot contractions exist. Fixed, thanks!

Framing Device

I feel there’s something off with Jamus’ dialogue on page 11 (in the pdf, the paragraph with geomancy mentioned). I can't lay my finger on what exactly, but he speaks more formally, or deliberately? Like someone who’s speaking a second language they learned for the most part through literature rather than immersion in its society.

ricky jackson

I love this, its a great oppurtunity for a random blue to cross their paths, and with a dynamo, diviner, attacker and future space mage together they could deff traverse the danger zone. Idr their levels but maybe we might be getting our first set of silvers outside the main group

SenescentSoul

If you're in the app, try in a web browser instead.

Radius Morse

It says attachment not found when I click on the pdf.

SenescentSoul

Fixed, thanks!

JoshCalmick

God I love Staavo. So much of the dialogue with him is just a joy to read

"Any signal we made could be seen by an areal patrol..." -> "Any signal we made could be seen by an aerial patrol..."

SenescentSoul

Fixed, thanks!

Elaborate

see the man haphazardly toward him -> slide/move haphazardly?

Gnossos

Felt kind of like the chapter didn’t need to end there and could have included the fight or whatever happened next. After the last chapter I am waiting for things to get back on track. Not hugely a fan of the sprawl of focus. I know this group’s misadventure is important to explain how Rain gets information about the situation at the maelstrom, but it feels like a bit of a tangent.